OS ways and Poor Health

LameWolf

Polly I'm another who doesn't "do" groups. The first time I got referred to the pain clinic (back when I lived near Bicester - so over 15 years ago) they insisted I do an 8-week group course; and how I got through it without killing someone is beyond me! And I expected to be given pointers on how to do tasks to minimise the occurrence of more pain, not a load of psycho-babble about living in the Now and accepting the pain is part of your life and stuff. It's only my anger that keeps me from giving up totally some days! I'm like, This f&$£%*g illness is NOT winning.
GGGGRRRRRRR <--- Rottweiler growl. :rotfl:

Doom_and_Gloom

LameWolf wrote: »

Polly I'm another who doesn't "do" groups. The first time I got referred to the pain clinic (back when I lived near Bicester - so over 15 years ago) they insisted I do an 8-week group course; and how I got through it without killing someone is beyond me! And I expected to be given pointers on how to do tasks to minimise the occurrence of more pain, not a load of psycho-babble about living in the Now and accepting the pain is part of your life and stuff. It's only my anger that keeps me from giving up totally some days! I'm like, This f&$£%*g illness is NOT winning.
GGGGRRRRRRR <--- Rottweiler growl. :rotfl:

You guys saying about 'support groups etc' and how the people are in them make me glad that I can just say I don't do well with groups if I'm ever advised to go to something like that.
As you say yea this is your life and yes pain is a part of that. However looking at what you can do is better. My ma and dad when I'm at their place always let me get on with things I can do and only step in when I'm obviously pushing myself further than I should, OH does the same at home. Being as independent as possible is a big thing. Working around the 'problem' in a way you can is better than just focusing on it.

Tiddlywinks

LameWolf wrote: »

..... not a load of psycho-babble about living in the Now and accepting the pain is part of your life and stuff. It's only my anger that keeps me from giving up totally some days! I'm like, This f&$£%*g illness is NOT winning.

But that's the reality though when you have a chronic and painful condition.

Accepting that pain is part of your life now is not giving in - acknowledging the limitations of the condition can actually be really liberating - instead of feeling the pain and thinking 'oh no, not again, it's not fair, I feel bad', it's about changing your reaction to thinking 'oh right, pain again, well let's just do what I can to occupy my mind with something more interesting'.

Don't get me wrong - I know how difficult I found it when I first became ill. My life now compared to then is just barely recognisable. I've gone from an operational role with massive travelling and responsibility to taking early retirement with a huge cut to the household income. Plus, my social life is less frantic etc.

But, it is what it is. Life happens. No one to blame.... I had a choice: live with the anger or live with the peace of accepting that my life has changed and so cut my cloth accordingly.

It worked for me - that's all I can say.

CRANKY40

mardatha wrote: »

Anybody else notice the birds starting to nest? I was out in the garden today for an hour tidying up, and the jackdaws in the chimneys were going mad - bickering and arguing about the best chimney to nest in probably lol. What a racket they make. Then the buzzards were spiralling and calling - such a beautiful noise they make.

No, but my cousin heard the first woodpecker today

caronc

Afternoon everyone,
After making a brief appearance yesterday my mojo has jumped back in the cupboard today so not got much done.
Picking up on earlier comments - what is getting me through this period is that I'm a "glass half full" kind of gal which I think helps my overall outlook to trying to live a new "normal". I'm at that point where there are so many uncertainties of what my future looks like regarding work/income that inevitably I get very frustrated at times. Yes, I am much. much more than my condition but still finding my way re living as full a life as possible with it's limitations and at present being essentially housebound which creates a whole different set of both social and practical challenges. I'm finding this thread really useful for a bit of "virtual" moral support.:)

PS- birds are beginning to nest here too:D

pollyanna_26

Mar I had a bit of time earlier when the sun came out , I started cutting some of the smaller twigs off a few of the shrubs and in a matter of minutes the birds were picking them up and heading to their usual nesting places in the garden . Lots of bulbs in flower now and my much loved pale lemon Welsh primroses have begun flowering .

Pain clinics can vary some have rigid programmes others such as ours have a pick and mix style . At ours lots of things are optional including groups and get togethers .

I don't feel everything is about anger . I say over and over again here that everyone is an individual . I and a few here are stubborn and frustrated which is the last way to be in terms of of acceptance .
When my illnesses were diagnosed I researched did the pacing etc . but pretty well all my life I've been the fixer and doer through pretty tough times and the frustration is me not being me anymore .
polly

CRANKY40

I don't think this thread does tend towards the "I'm feeling bad". It's in it's early stages really where we're still getting to know each other and part of this involves stating what problems we as individuals are facing.

There have been lots of suggestions for things that help too such as the sushi roll method of duvet cover replacement. A friend of mine suggested this to me ages ago after a facebook post that I made and I can now strip my bed and replace the bedding without it half killing me and making me very cross. I have the flat purple silicon jar opener from Lakeland and it's so helpful (I gave one to my MIL but she thought it was an air freshener and hung it in the hall).

My greatest allies so far have been physiotherapists. When I'm having a problem (like the damage that I did to my hip which cause the muscle to go into spasm when walking) the physios have always been wonderful. Their greatest interest is helping you to achieve things that you think you should be doing but can't at the moment. My first question to my doctor whenever something else stupid and pain causing has happened is not "Can I have better painkillers" but "Can I go for physio". He usually says yes.

I'm in a lot of pain today because I've just started walking along the prom in the mornings again. It's hurting now but I've been assured that it's a means to supporting my decidedly dodgy spine properly so I'll be in less pain eventually. I try to work on a "use it or lose it" basis. I was laughing to myself this morning thinking that when I was small and forced to walk everywhere I used to dream of being pushed along. Now I'm nearly 50, the thought of a wheelchair would be my greatest nightmare yet it's reality for some EDS patients.

I have the occasional very bad day like the day when my dentist mentioned my son's dental problems thus confirming some of my worst fears. I found that extremely hard to handle coming only four days after the death of a very close friend. Most of the time I try to focus on what I can do, not what I can't - most things in truth if you ignore the constant dropping of stuff and the occasional exclamation of "ouch" as I move. My biggest focus is how many painkillers I don't take. I've managed without dihydrocodeine (still had co-codamol at bed time) for the last two days. Happy? Oh yes, very much so :T

CRANKY40

p.s. Thanks for the nesting warnings. Time to hang a bell on the furry four legged birdie murderer. I wondered why she'd been so keen to get outside the last couple of days.....

[Deleted User]

i have a large fir tree at the bottom of my garden and this time of the year there are collared doves and magpies fighting over it .Gets quite heated at times and pretty noisy as well . I also get a blackbird every year that sits on my study windowsill and taps with his beak.i usually chuck some bits out for him as he nests in my garden and seems to think my house is the local cafe :)

Think there must be rain on the way as my joints are giving me gyp tonight , I'll have to dig out my strong painkillers before bedtime, or I will be awake half the night. I too am not a joiner of 'groups' unless its something that interests me and has nothing to do with my health problems :):)

Prinzessilein

Evening all!

I am another of the no-groupers! I accept that they help some people - but definitely not for me!

I haven't seen much in the way of nesting birds. I live on the East Coast....we mainly see seagulls, and particularly vicious ones that scare any other bird away!...They will have a go at humans too given half a chance. I have seen a gull steal chips from a toddler. ..And the feathered brutes are supposedly 'endangered' so we can't consider any 'permanent ' methods of getting rid of them!

Tomorrow I have a dental appointment (EEK!)...just a check-up. It means a short walk - through the park, we often see squirrels there.