My devil mother is seeking forgiveness before she dies!

cr1mson

My cousins had a dreadful father alcoholic and abusive, although never physically. One of them chose to forgive him and remember him for his one positive attribute ie encouraging her artistic talents and the other only has hate for him. Guess which one is happier? You don't forgive for her you do it for you.

faerielight

I don't know your background story, but I can totally relate to you.. I have a truck tonne of hate and rage towards my evil mother.. she sexually abused me and encouraged her make cousin too, and she has no remorce, she even wrote me a letter saying it was a good thing to be abused. People have said so many times to let it go and forgive her, but I try every day, but I can't seem to let it go.. some woulds are too deep. I have a lot of revenge fantasies, such as reading out the letter she wrotew at her funeral, and I'm desperate for the appology, although I know it will never come.. I think there is a difference between inflicting revenge fantasies on an abuser and actually doing it, and I doubt I ever would read the letter..
When my dad died and he was very violent, I felt a complex grief.. that he was dead and therefore never going to say the sorry and make it up to me, but I also felt relief, they he couldn't huirt me anymore and I've let a lot of it go, but my mum is still alive and I cant release it.. Maybe when she does die, it will be a relife, and it is at least an apology, which may help you heal a bit from it, and get some closure when she dies.