Urgent advice needed re: lodger

anselld

djdust wrote: »

Actually he was lodging with me because it had something to do with the fact that if he was living at home just before going to Uni he got a smaller grant or less preferential treatment for something or other. Not entirely sure what, he never really explained. Anyone got any idea what it could be..?

So... a cheat and a scrounger then.

djdust

melanzana wrote: »

Ok, I know this is stressful for OP.

Indeed. I know it's not particularly relevant and I'm certainly not looking to score any sympathy but I had a traumatic event happen to me at the end of last year that completely knocked the stuffing out of me and I've been practically a hermit ever since just trying to sort myself out and hold my sanity together. I really didn't need this crap happening to me and, for the last time, was just trying to do a mate a favour. If I'd have know how this was going to turn out, I'd have definitely not bothered and happily done without the money. Lesson learned.

melanzana wrote: »

Will you stay friends with Mother? I wouldn't, no added value there!

I've barely seen her over the last few years anyway, we both live busy different lives now.

djdust

missbiggles1 wrote: »

Well, he could be claiming to be from estranged from his family and so an independent student, in which case the power's in your hands to report this. Neither does it reflect favourably on your old friend, his mother.

Well, if he is, I'm not going to grass him up. I've no doubt if I did, I'd end up being the bigger loser in the grand scheme of things.

missbiggles1 wrote: »

How old is he?

About 22 I think.

Smodlet

Just another way to screw the taxpayers?

summerholiday

My thoughts:

Take a deep breathe. Say to yourself: I am strong and in charge of what happens under my roof!

Get your priorities right and grow some backbone here! No more understanding - its his story - right?

And his story is of no further interest to you - you now judge and jury.

1) Retain any further post addressed to him.

2) Write and let him know that you are prepared to shop him to the university if he does not pay you the outstanding monies. That should bring him down to earth.

3) Write that should he not pay you the outstanding monies in one lump sum within 5 working days that you will take the matter further to the small claims court and mean it ! (Get papers ready to do so in the meanwhile).

4) Do not return his goods until the debt is paid - (put them in the attic for safe keeping - do not tell him this).

5) Is he really selling his guitar I doubt it.

Really the question is, are you prepared to take control here.

summerholiday

My thoughts:

Take a deep breathe. Say to yourself: I am strong and in charge of what happens under my roof!

Get your priorities right and grow some backbone here! No more understanding - its his story - right?

And his story is of no further interest to you - you are now judge and jury.

1) Retain any further post addressed to him until he pays up. One may be confirming his grant!

2) Write and let him know that you are prepared to shop him to the university if he does not pay you the outstanding monies. That should bring him down to earth.

3) Write that should he not pay you the outstanding monies in one lump sum within 5 working days that you will take the matter further to the small claims court and mean it ! (Get papers ready to do so in the meanwhile).

4) Do not return his goods until the debt is paid - (put them in the attic for safe keeping - do not tell him this).

5) Is he really selling his guitar I doubt it.

Really the question is, are you prepared to take control here.

Mojisola

djdust wrote: »

That's not true at all, I've no idea how people are coming to that conclusion simply because I mentioned in my opening post that he was the son of an old friend. 2 + 2 =/= 5.

Would you have taken him in as a lodger if he hadn't been your friend's son?

Would you have been such a 'soft touch' when the first month's rent wasn't paid in full?

-taff

Personally, I'd sell his stuff and keep the money for his unpaid rent, however illegal it may be.
If he can't prove he owns it, he can't prove it's his stuff.

His mother has nothing to do with it, he's an adult at 22, and basically, he screwed over someone and expected to get away with it.

-taff

A quick search turns up 'estranged student' where he can be assessed on his own money not his mother as well if he can prove he's estranged.

martindow

Personally I would stop worrying about what he is selling on Ebay and hiding in your own house and let him collect his stuff. When he comes I would give him a letter before action with a list of payments made and rent owing. I'd also send a copy of the letter first class with a certificate of posting to him at his mother's address.

After a week I'd open a claim. Despite the mother washing her hands of her son she might pressure him to pay up or settle it herself so he is not saddled with a CCJ.