No children at wedding

Jagraf

A wedding is a ceremony where two people are united in marriage. Not two families. You do not need any family at any wedding. It is entirely up to those two people who they invite.

Peter333

BarryBlue wrote: »

That may be true if we had large or close families. I have a daughter who lives 100 miles away and my wife has an aged mother. Neither of us has siblings. Beyond that, families play no real part in our lives. She has a couple of cousins whom she sees occasionally, I have cousins I never see. None live locally to us.

I can't see how this would give us a miserable time, I have to say. We manage to lead perfectly fulfilled lives without having to socialise with relatives whom we haven't chosen and may not have much in common with. The thought of having to keep in constant touch with various cousins etc fills me with dread.

This. ^^^ I have been amazed at the amount of people I know who had 300-400 people at their wedding. They can't POSSIBLY all be close friends and close family. I don't even know that many people. Probably not even half that!

Several of these people actually confessed they were not happy with it all too, and the wedding had been taken out of their hands with parents and in-laws running the show. One girl I know (I'll call her Kelly,) was getting married 2 years ago, and her mother and her husband to be's mother managed to invite 365 people! Kelly said she didn't know over 300 of them. And the vast majority of them, she had not ever even met! I could tell you of a couple of similar cases.

So there are some people with huge amounts of guests, who have family members who invited many of them. Then again, you do have the people who think the more people they have at their wedding, the more popular they are.

These are the same people who have 1000-1500 facebook 'friends' and pee their pants every time a post of theirs gets a 'like.' :rotfl:

Funny thing is, I know about 15 people with 800-1200 'friends' on facebook, and all their posts generally ever get is 35-65 'likes.' So there is often more than 95% of their 'friends' who don't even acknowledge their posts!

As far as I'm concerned, it's quality, not quantity. I would rather have 20 people at any wedding or party or 'do' of mine, that I love and care about, and who love and care about me, than 300 people who I barely know from Adam!

Person_one

Jagraf wrote: »

A wedding is a ceremony where two people are united in marriage. Not two families. You do not need any family at any wedding. It is entirely up to those two people who they invite.

For lots of couples it is about two families joining together, I went to a wedding yesterday that was very much on that theme and it was lovely. I've also been to weddings that are very low key adult only events focusing just on the couple and they've usually been very nice too. Both are perfectly valid ways to view the occasion.

Why do people get so dogmatic and competitive when it comes to weddings?

Jagraf

Person_one wrote: »

For lots of couples it is about two families joining together, I went to a wedding yesterday that was very much on that theme and it was lovely. I've also been to weddings that are very low key adult only events focusing just on the couple and they've usually been very nice too. Both are perfectly valid ways to view the occasion.

Why do people get so dogmatic and competitive when it comes to weddings?

I agree. It's entirely what the couple want it to be. There is no right or wrong.

onlyroz

Jagraf wrote: »

A wedding is a ceremony where two people are united in marriage. Not two families. You do not need any family at any wedding. It is entirely up to those two people who they invite.

So how would you feel if your son or daughter didn't invite you to their wedding?

onlyroz

BarryBlue wrote: »

That may be true if we had large or close families. I have a daughter who lives 100 miles away and my wife has an aged mother. Neither of us has siblings. Beyond that, families play no real part in our lives. She has a couple of cousins whom she sees occasionally, I have cousins I never see. None live locally to us.

I can't see how this would give us a miserable time, I have to say. We manage to lead perfectly fulfilled lives without having to socialise with relatives whom we haven't chosen and may not have much in common with. The thought of having to keep in constant touch with various cousins etc fills me with dread.

I'm not really talking about relatives who live at a distance and who you rarely see, if ever. I can see why you wouldn't necessarily want to keep in touch with all your family, or have them at your wedding.

I was more commenting on the posts along the lines of "a wedding is just for two people and nobody else is necessary". Most people do have close family members and I would find it bewildering if they didn't want these people at their wedding. Also, if you are close to your family then I don't really see how a relationship could work if your partner didn't get on with them.

Torry_Quine

Person_one wrote: »

For lots of couples it is about two families joining together, I went to a wedding yesterday that was very much on that theme and it was lovely. I've also been to weddings that are very low key adult only events focusing just on the couple and they've usually been very nice too. Both are perfectly valid ways to view the occasion.

Why do people get so dogmatic and competitive when it comes to weddings?

Well said.

Jagraf

onlyroz wrote: »

So how would you feel if your son or daughter didn't invite you to their wedding?

Lots don't. I would probably be upset. But I know lots of people who have married abroad without any family present. Their choice, their prerogative. It's nothing to do with other family members.

seven-day-weekend

onlyroz wrote: »

Perhaps you don't, but for most people if you don't get on with your partner's family then you're in for a pretty miserable time.

'Not 'loving' them doesn't mean you don't get on with them. You just treat then with politeness and respect, like you would anyone else,

unholyangel

Big wedding, small, cheap, expensive, 1000 guests, 2 witnesses.....people want different things at their weddings for a variety of reasons.

I mean it is their wedding - if you don't agree with how they want to do it then go have a wedding of your own.

Someone invites us to a wedding but not kids, fine...no big deal. If we genuinely couldn't find someone to babysit we'd decline the invite with disappointment rather than resentment that the kids should have been invited just because we were. They're our kids - not theirs. Would you expect them to invite your dog too? Your gran? Your bff? No, but for some reason when it comes to kids people get offended if they're not invited! In some circumstances, apparently offended enough to have ill feelings about it 7 years later.

Life's too short to feel slighted over non-issues like this.