large booking at restaurant- how to split the bill?

missbiggles1

PasturesNew wrote: »

I've no job, no hobby group ... so a bit limited. The one person I do know I did meet at a job. When we've eaten out there's been three of us - me, her and her other friend ... and we all just pay for what we ordered, without any discussion.

We've been out twice so far, in about 3 years. Once it was a pub meal, the other time was a carvery and also included the husband of one and the "down on holiday" friend of the other. Everybody just naturally paid for what they had and went to the bar to buy their own drinks.

Well, I'm retired, have been almost housebound for years and only belong to a book group so I'm hardly Ms Popularity.

Person_one

missbiggles1 wrote: »

If somebody's that skint, why would they be going out for a meal in the first place?

To get out of the house and see their friends, or to join in a social occasion they've been invited to, to make a change from sitting in the cold eating beans on toast!

Honestly, check your privilege.

missbiggles1

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

That's it, isn't it. We too tend to go out with people in a similar situation/mindset to us.

If there was someone in the group who genuinely couldn't afford it, then tbh, the rest of us would pay for theirs.

I also think it tends to balance out with people you see regularly.

The last time I went out with one particular couple, I had a pudding and he didn't - the time before that we took them both out for lunch (as in we paid) and he chose to order a la carte, in a Michelin star restaurant so, who cares?

seven-day-weekend

Person_one wrote: »

To get out of the house and see their friends, or to join in a social occasion they've been invited to, to make a change from sitting in the cold eating beans on toast!

Honestly, check your privilege.

It's not a matter of that. If I only had a fiver to feed the family, I wouldn't be spending a tenner on eating in a restaurant. There are places you can socialise that don't cost anything, or only a small amount. Even half a pint in a pub is cheaper!

Person_one

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

It's not a matter of that. If I only had a fiver to feed the family, I wouldn't be spending a tenner on eating in a restaurant. There are places you can socialise that don't cost anything, or only a small amount. Even half a pint in a pub is cheaper!

Not everybody has a family to feed.

warehouse

I've been in situations before where we've split the bill and somebody has absolutely taken the pee with what they've eaten/drank and not put in the extra. As someone said previously, I'll never fall for it again.

seven-day-weekend

Person_one wrote: »

Not everybody has a family to feed.

That was the example given, so that was the one I was responding to.

Georgiegirl256

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

What? I meant we all paid for what we ate and then added a tip. I said £20 because that's usually what my share comes to. If it was £15 I'd have paid that. .

Well that's what we've been saying! Everyone pays their own share. I thought you'd said you were for splitting?

Person_one

PasturesNew wrote: »

Heat or eat, the beans always win with me ... and I try to keep £10 in my bag in case I randomly get invited out somewhere.

People don't like people who say "No..." you might not get asked again!

Socialising is important, if you can at all manage to get out and see people, even when you're absolutely broke and know that it means going out without something else basic I do think its good for your mental health.

missbiggles1

Person_one wrote: »

To get out of the house and see their friends, or to join in a social occasion they've been invited to, to make a change from sitting in the cold eating beans on toast!

Honestly, check your privilege.

It's nothing to do with privilege - when I've been skint (a pretty frequent occurrence:o) I didn't eat out except for the occasional curry/Wetherspoons and invited friends round for a cheap meal. I didn't go out to good restaurants with better off friends and spoil their evening by ordering one cheap course and a glass of water.

That's just common sense and good manners.