Here we can all be heard for a little while. Part 3

System

Hello shipmates, apologies for absence....this week has been somewhat up and down with coming off my anti depressent, ive been taking it very other day and the days not taking it have been not so great. I seem to be stupidly forgetful right now and my mood is up and down like a bloody spring. But new meds on thursday! Scary as i have no idea what effect they will have ( ihave however been proactve and warned my managers at work that i could be affected by side effects-they said they will work around it )

Its Swain's mum's birthday tomorrow, i'm going to get her some nice soap from TK Maxx (she loves soap) and also put in her card a little voucher saying it entitles her to one trip to the cinema to see a film of her choice. I get on really well with her Shes likes another mother to me (lol that takes the count to three with my mum and step mum too :eek: ) and always treats me like on of the fmaily so i want to treat her.

System

Calley so happy to hear things are going well with Lego Man :j you're an amazing person and you deserve happiness!

WaS- so glad Millefluer has her social days out and that she seems happier with it! and glad WaSP is having some me time to pursue his hobbies!


i said the word glad far to many times there ...i'm just very glad (i need a thesaurus)

calleyw

xXMessedUpXx wrote: »

Calley so happy to hear things are going well with Lego Man :j you're an amazing person and you deserve happiness!

MU,

thank you. I know I am deep down. Just difficult with the way I have been treated by people who claim to love you. And then mess you about. There mega loss

Its funny as I was only said to husband today that I would like them to meet. And his reply was yes fine. I am have not see you so happy in a long time :T

you be kind to yourself to MU as well. You have the support of a lot of people both on and off the internet.

Yours

Calley

System

calleyw wrote: »

MU,

thank you. I know I am deep down. Just difficult with the way I have been treated by people who claim to love you. And then mess you about. There mega loss

Its funny as I was only said to husband today that I would like them to meet. And his reply was yes fine. I am have not see you so happy in a long time :T

you be kind to yourself to MU as well. You have the support of a lot of people both on and off the internet.

Yours

Calley

I know it can be difficult when you've been treated badly in the past, you always have that niggling doubt that the other person isnt genuine, or stringing you along, that they;re not really interested, that they will hurt you. It takes a lot to get past that. Swain has been understanding n that part, he knows that the way he treats me (very very well) is alien to me but that i'm trying my best to embrace it as see it as normal. You'll get there hun enjoy it and try and beleive you are worth it.

also seeing as we are calling him Lego man (i think i missed the story behind that!) it reminded me of this song https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c4BLVznuWnU


Glad hubby is supportive My best friend (also ex) has been so supportiive of Swain even though they've not met yet (i'm working on that!)

System

May need some advice

back story, best friend knew this guy, he was somehwat unstable shall we say, i didnt like going to see him but went with my friend. the lst ocassion i went we all got drunk, was fine. few weeks later get a message from my friend sayingthis guy has claimed we broke his hat and hes very !!!!ed off with us. we didnt but my my friend told to just say i was sorry to calm him down. i did. that was a mistake. few weeks later he started calling me loads, giving me abuse, i blocked him. thenone sunday i got repeated calls off my friend in the morning eventually answered and she said this guy was at her flat and then he came on the phone, started threatening me so i hung up, friend calls back, swain answers friend is apparently being threatened with a knife but police are on their way. he gets arrested and it goes to court and she gets a restraining order and hes found guilty but on a suspended sentence.

now: a few weeks ago went to festival with friend, wasnt well and was trying to sleep in hotel room, friend come back and was talking to other girl (she thought i was asleep), overheard her saying that this guy has actually threatened to kill me i didn;t know this, she never told me this and now i'm feeling a)!!!!ed off at my friend for not telling me and therefor putting me in danger and b)scared as hell cos this guy lives at the next tram stop along and now i know he wants to kill me

can;t go to the polcie as i stupidly deleted the voicemails so have o evidence

i just don;t know what to do about my friend. on the one hand maybe she didn;t tell me to protect my feelings on the other i may possibly be in danger and im scared and !!!!ed off she didn;t tell me.

any advice?

whitewing

MU,

Your friend probably didn't tell you because she knows of your mh issues, and didn't want you to feel worse.

Contact the police anyway, if only so that you become a priority in the future. Perhaps they can offer you some advice.

People can often be very mouthy but not bothered to take the action they are mouthing off about.

Try not to worry too much, but still be vigilant without being hypervigilant.

System

whitewing wrote: »

MU,

Your friend probably didn't tell you because she knows of your mh issues, and didn't want you to feel worse.

Contact the police anyway, if only so that you become a priority in the future. Perhaps they can offer you some advice.

People can often be very mouthy but not bothered to take the action they are mouthing off about.

Try not to worry too much, but still be vigilant without being hypervigilant.

I shall consider going to the police

I know for a fact this guy is not just mouthy, he openly bragged about holding someone hostage and torturing them so i don;t doubt if he got a hold of me he's do serious harm. Problem is proving it. Unless i have proof i haave no chance of taking it further. Swain is not happy, he already doesn't like said friend (he has his reasons) and now ive told him this he;s even more !!!!ed off at her (mainly cos not knowing menat he can't protect me or something along those lines)

I guess i should talk to my friend, i'm just very annoyed (though i do think in hindsight she was trying to protect me) but dont known how too broach the subject?

whitewing

Go to the police anyway, and provide the chap's name and details (if they will take the,). Hope they will be reassuring.

Maybe agree with Swain and your manager at work that if they can't get hold of you for x amount of time, they will call the police.

It doesn't sound as if your friend is the healthiest person for you to be around at the moment, with so much drama. I don't mean to stop talking to her or have a bust up but maybe some distance would help you deal with the risk of this man a bit better.

If you do discuss it with your friend, do it in person, not on facebook or text. Prepare yourself that you may be disappointed with her response. For example, my DH and I have some things we disagree on. Neither of us is right or wrong but some things have no middle ground.

Does you friend know you overheard? If not, then just tell her and ask why she didn't tell you earlier.

Plus, maybe your friend would have told the police herself rather than you, if she wanted to protect you and was worried about your health, but it hadn't got to that point yet.

System

I'm giving her a wide bearth atm, changing meds i'm not in the most sound place of mind to discuss things rationally, but it needs to happen at some point. She doesnt know i overheard.

Its just shocked me to my core, knowing that he was threatening her to find out where i lived and where i worked so he couldget me. I mean i have to be thankful that she didn;t give those details (i need to cut her some slack for that), but i feel somewhat annoyed as she;s safe (so to speak) and i;m still at risk.

whitewing

It may be that he is psychologically messing with her by threatening you, rather than he is actively targeting you (not to say that he wouldn't have a go if he could).

Can you get a personal attack alarm and ensure you are psychologically prepared to use it, even if it turns out you made a mistake and you weren't in danger. (I used to carry one sometimes but secretly knew I was never likely to set it off as I felt too worthless and was more worried that I would sound it and no one would help). Remember that it is extremely difficult for other people to know you are in danger if there is an altercation - an alarm would help remove the doubt. People will try and help if they can, I promise you that.