Here we can all be heard for a little while. Part 3

mellymoo74

Tea not rambling at all.

I understand all bar the ivf bit. I think we try and justify it/make out its okay.

mellymoo74

And code
Working in a negative environment is draining just cos I am looking doesn't make your situation any less valid.

codemonkey

Response to tea penguin
I am ridiculously open about the fact that we can't have children. Well, not ridiculously open, really. If someone asks if I have children, I say no. If they push it (the usual you'll change your mind, there's plenty of time etc.), I tell the truth. If that makes them uncomfortable, then tough - they shouldn't push me in the first place. Like you I've reached the stage where it's not physically unbearably painful but it does give me a sad.

Nothing will ever diminish the children you lost, even those you never had because they were yours. I refuse to believe that my grief for the children I wanted is worth any less than the grief of losing an actual child, because those were my children and they had names and personalities and it's very sad that they never go to exist.

Does that make any sense?

End penguin.

tea_lover

Penguin reply to code.
A lot of sense, thank you. Absolutely, they were my children. The 4 embryos that were put back and implanted ever so briefly had names. The 18 that were fertilised but not put back, along with the 12 other eggs that were collected but didn't fertilise all had hopes and dreams for them. Every cycle (medicated or otherwise) for the five years we were trying had hopes and dreams. And when I glibly say something along the lines of "ooh kids.... no, not for me thanks" I feel like I'm letting them down.

How very silly.
End penguin.

In some ways I think it would be better to just be more honest with people, but I'm terrible at that. I don't talk about anything even remotely important in real life. Makes me feel far too vulnerable - my armour is definitely up at all times! I've hardly even mentioned the fact that FOH moved out a year ago to anyone :rotfl:.

Georgiegirl256

Pyxis wrote: »

Too far to go for a coach trip. It'd have to be a long weekend at least.
.

That's what I meant.

mellymoo74

http://www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/1163643/spaghetti-with-sardines

Might have this for tea

Pyxis

((((((((((Tea)))))))))))))))
You're not denying them, you are defending yourself from hurt. You're just deflecting the conversation away from a painful subject. That's allowed. I do it a lot at the moment.




((((((((((Code))))))))))))))

codemonkey wrote: »

I know I'm lucky to have a job but it's just so draining. i'm not expecting a team of happy, happy people all the time as I don't work for ceebeebies and that would be creepy.

Any chance you could get hold of a canister of nitrous oxide and release it into the office air? :D

mellymoo74

That's all 3 confirmed so Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday I shall be interviewing

mellymoo74

And tea I agree with the wise pyxis
It's like when your asked how you are, very very rarely will you say carp, I don't feel well and I spend most days crying usually it's well thanks how are you?

mellymoo74

Sorry everyone

Penguin






















RIP Prince. I loved you in the 80s

WaS not your fault!