Here we can all be heard for a little while. Part 3

Torry_Quine

Today was another day without anything happening or seeing anyone, that's five. I got woken by people digging up my neighbours garden. Eventually got bus into town bought a sandwich and sat people watching. The only conversation was someone asking about which bus to get. Popped into a charity shop and saw some golf clubs and lost it again.

jobbingmusician

WaS - I'm sort of pleased to hear it. He's in the best place - my worry was, with all the cuts, that he'd be neglected by the health service (and knowing how he hates doctors and stuff, he is probably miserable, but YAY to breaking up the clot!) Hope you're coping ok xxxx



Welcome, Marmite! Lovely to hear from you and hope you are bearing up in the heat.


Torry - I think that is really odd of Bill Roache (or silly journalism). Hugs xxx

calleyw

WaS,


Sorry to hear about WaSp.


My thoughts are with you both at this time.


Massive hugs, squishes or handshakes your choice or all of them if you prefer.


Yours


Calley x

marmiterulesok

Waves_and_Smiles wrote: »

Quick update from me. WaSp was taken into hospital this morning. After 10 days on blood thinners the clot has just become larger and is now moving upwards. They have him on intravenous blood thinners for 48 hours, if these do not work they will surgically break up the clot. He has also developed cellulitis in the leg so is on antibiotics for that. Good thoughts welcome please!

Gosh I'm sorry to hear that.He's in good hands though.Wishing a speedy recovery.

jobbingmusician wrote: »

Welcome, Marmite! Lovely to hear from you and hope you are bearing up in the heat.

Thank you.I'm wilting a bit TBH.

Torry_Quine wrote: »

Today was another day without anything happening or seeing anyone, that's five. I got woken by people digging up my neighbours garden. Eventually got bus into town bought a sandwich and sat people watching. The only conversation was someone asking about which bus to get. Popped into a charity shop and saw some golf clubs and lost it again.

I'm sorry for the pain you're going through.((Hugs))

marmiterulesok

marmiterulesok wrote: »

Is it ok to post here?
I'm really struggling with depression rn,feeling really lost,empty and raw.Going through a change of medication too so got to ride that out.I just need somewhere to vent.
Thank you.

Hi.I don't feel too much better.
I'm very lonely too.I don't work any more and really miss the social aspect of work.(I'm medically retired).I live alone.
I also isolated myself a lot from other peolpe over a number of years due to depression and find that i have precious few people that I can call on as friends.
I live abroad and have just had a holiday with my family.This is what is ripping me apart.I want to be with them now.I so miss their company.
Lots of things to decide and think over.
Starting on new ADs too doesn't help things.This raw feeling and sense of loss is overwhelming.
Trying to take one day at a time.
I can't cry either.I wish I could but the tears won't come.

jobbingmusician

Sorry to be so long replying.


Does chatting on here help at all? Are there any other forums which might help? (Elefriends?) (Not trying to divert you from this forum, of course, just conscious that I'm not going to be around much today, and wasn't yesterday.)

Funny story about Elefriends - I have some friends who set up their own Elefriends. I thought it was for mutual MH support (it was, actually!) It took me a while to realise they had never heard of the 'proper' Elefriends and they are all actually called Ellie or Eleanor...........

dekaspace

My relative has phoned me again, their usual tactics of giving me a call out of the blue and being nicey nicey then a few minutes later saying "don't hate me, I have an emergency I need X cash today or X thing will happen" (his "partner" will be evicted, she has been in an accident and has bills to pay, her "sister" or "mother" have been in an accident or having landlord problems)


He was wanting £100 from me!!! He KNOWS I am on benefits, I sort of guessed when he said that he was planning to pay back his debt starting in 2 weeks time.


His text was basically "you know how im paying you back some of the debt soon, well then I need some money until then as its an emergency"


He says the same sort of wording every time I gave him cash, he always planned to pay it back in a week or two, but was short of cash till then, he would always then have some "unexpected" situation that stopped him paying back.


Even if hes being truthful in the emergencies my interpretation is hes spending his own cash and/or his partner is on top knowing they can turn to me as a soft touch to pay their bills by guilt tripping me and saying if the bill isn't paid things like evicition would happen.


Was a year or two ago I paid them some cash as they said they went to a loan shark as I never messaged them in time (all of 30 minutes after their initial text asking for money) so a £30 "emergency" cost me £120 or the loan shark would break his legs.


Oh and to edit, last payment I sent him was a £20 phone top up as his partner had gone back to her own country for a few weeks, he kept begging me and I eventually agreed and he then went "ok then, instead of a £20 top up can it be £30" when I said no he went "but I have no home internet, I need to speak to her every day and theres data costs"

jobbingmusician

How about saying it's funny you should ring I was just about to ring you as I have a financial emergency?

( excuse lack of punctuation as I am experimenting with dictation on my phone

onomatopoeia99

I suggest not answering the phone when said relative calls. I routinely ignore the phone if I don't want to talk to people.

[Deleted User]

jobbingmusician wrote: »

How about saying it's funny you should ring I was just about to ring you as I have a financial emergency?

( excuse lack of punctuation as I am experimenting with dictation on my phone

onomatopoeia99 wrote: »

I suggest not answering the phone when said relative calls. I routinely ignore the phone if I don't want to talk to people.

Both of these suggestions (the second if you have caller display of course). Saying 'No' the first time is the hardest - it gets easier after that. Whatever your relative's situation is, it's their situation which they need to manage themselves.

If you are ill and in hospital or worse, who will they ask then?
You're not helping either them or yourself if you continue to bail them out. They have to learn that ... I know it's easier to say than do, and maybe goes against your natural instinct to help if you can, but it isn't fair on you!