We're aware that some users are experiencing technical issues which the team are working to resolve. See the Community Noticeboard for more info. Thank you for your patience.
📨 Have you signed up to the Forum's new Email Digest yet? Get a selection of trending threads sent straight to your inbox daily, weekly or monthly!

Accident at nursery

Options
13468921

Comments

  • OP, I love my children and granddaughter dearly, and I would do anything for them. This includes allowing them to grow and develop into well rounded citizens, able to make decisions for themselves. They have never been wrapped in cotton wool, but that doesn't mean to say that I love them any less.


    You seem quite obsessive about your niece. Yes, you love her, but you seem to want to control her life. I love my kids, but don't have that need for control. I think this says more about you (and your insecurities?) than is does about your sister's ability to parent.
  • Poppie68
    Poppie68 Posts: 4,881 Forumite
    Tenth Anniversary Combo Breaker
    VfM4meplse wrote: »
    I am not seeking control, but I don't think its too much to expect for us to be consistent in our actions given the vast amount of time I spend looking after her. If that means ganging up on the nursery, so be it :D

    I'm being silly now. Obviously time for beddyhouse.

    hqdefault.jpg




    Vast amount of time looking after her.....You say she's in nursery all day every day so how vast can this time be?
    You can't gang up on any nursery because it's nothing to do with you, they have a contract with your sister which could be in jeopardy if you cause trouble between them...
    I spend great amounts of time with my granddaughter but my job is to do as my daughter asks with HER child and not have my own agenda which you seem to have with your niece.
    It's coming across as very unhealthy obsessive behaviour on your part and I truthfully pity your sister... You could very well see yourself cut out if your nieces life in the future so you need to deal with YOUR issues before disaster strikes.
    You sister seems like a normal hardworking mum who just wants to provide a decent normal upbringing for her child so leave them to it.
  • On my first day at work fulltime, the youngest offspring, a whole year old, small and only standing for the previous three weeks, decided to join in with the boys (fifteen months and two years old) and play with a toy plane. As she wobbled off her feet onto the three inch thick carpet, underlaid with another inch of cushioned foam, she nosedived into the plane's wing.

    My phone was off - it was my first day at work, after all - so I got home that evening to find offspring #2 had been to hospital and had her head superglued back together, along with a certificate for being 'very brave' crossed out and replaced with 'the bravest baby in the World'. She'd not made a squeak as the poor woman had picked up her newest charge bleeding profusely with a mini 747 embedded into her scalp and rushed to hospital - or when it was cleaned and glued.

    She hasn't had a bruise free day for the 15 years and 4 months since.

    Obviously, the aeroplane got cleaned off and relocated to the bin, but sometimes stuff happens, no matter how much you try. Some kids could manage to damage themselves in a padded cell.

    It's a normal part of growing up and you need to stop fretting about it. After all, her mother isn't.
    I could dream to wide extremes, I could do or die: I could yawn and be withdrawn and watch the world go by.
    colinw wrote: »
    Yup you are officially Rock n Roll :D
  • Savvy_Sue
    Savvy_Sue Posts: 47,310 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    VfM4meplse wrote: »
    Would you expect a child to have an accident whilst supervised at a nursery?
    It happens.
    VfM4meplse wrote: »
    Aside from informing the parents asap, and noting it in the accident book, is there any requirement to look at the circumstances and put additional saftey precautions in place?
    'Best practice' says that any workplace looks at the circumstances around any accident or even 'near miss' to see if anything needs to change. However, there may not be any additional safety precautions which can be taken.

    :rotfl: at some of the toilet related ones. I used to help run an out of school club: one child walked slap bang into a wheely bin as we walked in pairs from the station to the Zoo. He was too busy talking to his partner to look where he was going!
    Signature removed for peace of mind
  • FBaby
    FBaby Posts: 18,374 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    But like I say, I don't think anyone could look after her better than me!
    I am guessing this was written with tongue in cheek, but I would actually say that your niece is likely to be in much better care with someone who isn't half as protective as you are. Parents who think their children should never have an accident, whose every single move are supervise grow up to be children lacking confidence and anxious to take any risk and as such miss out on many opportunities.

    My boy fell down when he was 12 months old and open the top of his eye at nursery. He didn't need stitches but had to have strips over it and 12 years later, he has a small scar. I never ever thought of blaming his nursery because it could have happened at home.

    He also broke his arms.... twice at school! Playing football at lunch time. Again, nothing to do with the school.

    I did spend a lot of time and energy to make sure my children attended nurseries and schools I was happy with the care and education they provided. That didn't change after these accidents. All those people involved in providing care/education to my children have contributed to them becoming contented, confident and successful teenagers.
  • FBaby
    FBaby Posts: 18,374 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    When wife was a primary school teacher and saw how sad these kids were being treated as though they're an inconvenience to their parents career, when all they want is to spend more time with their mum or dad is heart breaking and why we decided when we had kids that she would stay at home and be a parent, not pay some stranger to do their job. We also waited until she was over 3 before enrolling her, partly because if she didnt like it or something happened she would be able to tell us, and partly she went to other clubs and loved spending time with mum. Dont get why youd want to have kids only to palm them off most of the week onto someone else whilst paying extortionate fees.
    Clearly a personal views clouding judgement! My personal experience is the exact experience, a good friend of mine who is a reception class TA saying that children who had been at nursery since they were little were adapting so much better to school and were so much more confident which ultimately allowed them to start learning quicker than those children who had only gone for a few hours of pre-school and really struggle to detach themselves from their mum, who needed more care to learn to be happy away from mum.

    My kids are teenagers and I can now look back and know I did the right thing for them. They both loved nursery. Maybe it is because I made sure they went to one I knew they were getting personal care rather then being treated like just any other child coming to their care. They have stayed in touch with a couple of their keyworkers. They became part of their extended family. Not all nurseries treat kids like cattle. They are some who actually employ staff who love kids, love looking after them and actually build some attachment to them.

    You might not understand why some women decide to go to work, that doesn't mean that it is wrong. I have actually asked my children if they wished I'd been a SAHM and they said that they definitely didn't because if I didn't work, they wouldn't have experienced things that loved that unfortunately cost money. They are grateful that they have been given these opportunities.

    Your wife is a teacher, she could afford to take time off and then go straight back to her job earning a decent salary. That is not available to everyone. Most parents do what they think is best for their children. What they don't need is teachers who use their own personal views to be judge others who make difference choices.
  • haras_nosirrah
    haras_nosirrah Posts: 2,208 Forumite
    Have I missed it or has op not actually said what the accident was

    If it is in the realms of bruise, scraped knee, bumped head or something classed as minor then no the nursery are not accountable and can't put safeguards in place to prevent these unless they invest in a load of bubble wrap to wrap the kids and furniture up in. A childhood without a grazed knee sounds like a boring childhood and kids need to experience some 'ow's' to understand danger and consequences.

    If however your 1 year old niece ended up falling off the top of the climbing frame as she had escaped the nursery room unnoticed then it is a different ball game and yes that would be cause for concern

    What was the accident?
    I am a Mortgage Adviser
    You should note that this site doesn't check my status as a Mortgage Adviser, so you need to take my word for it. This signature is here as I follow MSE's Mortgage Adviser Code of Conduct. Any posts on here are for information and discussion purposes only and shouldn't be seen as financial advice.
  • suejb2
    suejb2 Posts: 1,918 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Photogenic
    I predict another post soon
    "My sister is taking over"
    "My sister-in-law is a control freak"
    "How to tell my aunty to back off"
    Life is like a bath, the longer you are in it the more wrinkly you become.
  • Person_one
    Person_one Posts: 28,884 Forumite
    Tenth Anniversary 10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    jaydeeuk1 wrote: »
    When wife was a primary school teacher and saw how sad these kids were being treated as though they're an inconvenience to their parents career, when all they want is to spend more time with their mum or dad is heart breaking and why we decided when we had kids that she would stay at home and be a parent, not pay some stranger to do their job.

    Did you go part time too, to share that responsibility and so your children could have that lovely quality time with dad too?
  • pollypenny
    pollypenny Posts: 29,432 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper Photogenic
    Wow! I answered what I thought was a reasonable question. Now I find that there's a lot more to it.

    I didn't know that the child involved is a niece. The OP is over-stepping the mark and in real danger of estrangement from her sister.
    Member #14 of SKI-ers club

    Words, words, they're all we have to go by!.

    (Pity they are mangled by this autocorrect!)
This discussion has been closed.
Meet your Ambassadors

🚀 Getting Started

Hi new member!

Our Getting Started Guide will help you get the most out of the Forum

Categories

  • All Categories
  • 350.9K Banking & Borrowing
  • 253.1K Reduce Debt & Boost Income
  • 453.5K Spending & Discounts
  • 243.9K Work, Benefits & Business
  • 598.7K Mortgages, Homes & Bills
  • 176.9K Life & Family
  • 257.2K Travel & Transport
  • 1.5M Hobbies & Leisure
  • 16.1K Discuss & Feedback
  • 37.6K Read-Only Boards

Is this how you want to be seen?

We see you are using a default avatar. It takes only a few seconds to pick a picture.