Money Moral Dilemma: Should I ask my partner to pay me for childcare?

pollypenny

Surely families don't pay each other for various jobs.

Throughout our marriage our finances have varied enormously, with me having seven years as a SAHM. Then, later years, I earned considerably more than OH.

It was all our money ,not his or mine.

Person_one

duchy wrote: »

I
It'd be clear to all but the incredibly touchy (or those trying to stir) that the point is that someone who lives as a couple with children would never ask such a question

Erm, but it seems they have...

Your post implies that you'd have to be single or living at home to be stupid enough to have asked this question, or the previous idiotic 'dilemmas'. It should be obvious from regular reading of this board, and indeed the housing ones, that being in a couple or living independently do not confer any kind of special wisdom or raise your intelligence level!

ButterflyLC

You want paid to look after your own child? Is this a serious question? I can only assume that you have your money and he has his money. In this case it would be best to have a household spending pot (i.e foods, bills, childcare etc) a child spending pot (new clothes and essentials etc) and a personal spending pot that is equal. It's not right that you are asking to be paid to look after your child.

Ebenezer_Screwj

You want to present your "partner" (whatever that means) with a bill for looking after your own child? You should work more hours or budget more sensibly if you want more money.

Stevie_Palimo

pollypenny wrote: »

Surely families don't pay each other for various jobs.

Throughout our marriage our finances have varied enormously, with me having seven years as a SAHM. Then, later years, I earned considerably more than OH.

It was all our money ,not his or mine.

In a way you actually do so here ie:- Partner does work in or out of home and other does things the other way round thus meaning these jobs are not costing actual money but if put to others would do so, Also my oh says that if she can use my cc the following day I will be in for a good night lol, I do get them anyway but she seems to suck up to me all the more when she has her eye on a new handbag, shoes or something else that takes her notion, I'd class this as a in kind payment.

Suffolk_Gardener

You should consider yourself lucky to be able to spend extra time with your children. This is a privilege your partner does not have - perhaps you should pay him rather than the other way round. If you don't consider yourself lucky, perhaps you should ask yourself why you decided to have children.

JayD

Are you serious???

And MSE - are you that stuck for money moral dilemmas you choose to put this one up?

You are partners! Why would you charge each other for 'services' involved in running a home and bringing up a family together?
Like general domestic chores too? How about 'services' in the bedroom???

Get real! And start acting like a family!

Fujiko

Just an idea - why don't you stay at home and look after your children which would mean you wouldn't have to pay someone else to look after them? Nobody makes you have children. If you can't afford them don't have them.

janiebquick

Think yourself lucky that your partner splits the childcare costs on the three days you are at work.

Jagraf

Suffolk_Gardener wrote: »

You should consider yourself lucky to be able to spend extra time with your children. This is a privilege your partner does not have - perhaps you should pay him rather than the other way round. If you don't consider yourself lucky, perhaps you should ask yourself why you decided to have children.

Whereas its a daft dilemma, I would certainly rather work than be a sahm. That is just my experience / opinion but it can also be a privilege to work while your child is being looked after at home.

I can't imagine the luxury of having a job then coming home to cared for children, a clean and tidy house, and dinner cooking.

I did it all myself - job, child, housework while my ex disappeared and concentrated on his new relationship and his career (bitter face). Long time ago but as I said to him, his child was being looked after 24 hours a day for about £1 an hour.

Re the dilemma, a functional family environment would just pool their money to make it go further.