Nice People Thread No. 15, a Cyber Summer

Doozergirl

PasturesNew wrote: »

You think that as you've spent years at the top of the pecking order tree

On the contrary, I've spent years suffering with anxiety and very much feeling like the bottom of any tree.

None of it is real. Just because we think things, it doesn't make it so. It's an internal voice. If we're hearing it, who is doing the talking?

Do you genuinely listen to one 'pigeon hole' type of person over another when it comes to low level general 'stuff'? I bet you don't. I hope you don't!

Pyxis

One of the nice things about this forum is that you could be discussing something with people of all ages and from all walks of life and backgrounds, and all different parts of the country, and never know it, a least not initially!

Ok, you can 'get to know' roughly what age people are, what sex they are, what job they do, what views they hold etc., but in general terms it's a great leveller.

Sometimes it is rather nice to share a joke with someone, or a brief chat, and not even know what sex they are or what age!

And like when Annie posted, suddenly you could be talking to a complete stranger on the other side of the world, about something you have in common with them!

Ain't t'internet wunnerful!

Tahlullah

As far as I can tell, from what you are saying Pastures, the homes are the right size for families. And if they are family sized, then you will always get families in them. And families usually mean children. And children usually have friends, and friends come round to play.

As you said, the issue is that there is no designated play area or park, so they will play close to home. And challenging the noise or behaviour brings it's own challenges for you regarding being seen to be 'neighbourly'.

You will get reprieve. In winter when they will play inside on the X boxes and play stations, and as they get older when they will go out to the pub, club, wherever to socialise.

What's the average age of the kids. I guess if they are 'sticky looking' they are under 10.

You have a few years more, unless the parents move; or you do.

silvercar

Shame you can't replace the fences with prickly bushes.

Those doofing balls would be flat in no time.

Pyxis

Tahlullah wrote: »

As far as I can tell, from what you are saying Pastures, the homes are the right size for families. And if they are family sized, then you will always get families in them. And families usually mean children. And children usually have friends, and friends come round to play.

As you said, the issue is that there is no designated play area or park, so they will play close to home. And challenging the noise or behaviour brings it's own challenges for you regarding being seen to be 'neighbourly'.

You will get reprieve. In winter when they will play inside on the X boxes and play stations, and as they get older when they will go out to the pub, club, wherever to socialise.

What's the average age of the kids. I guess if they are 'sticky looking' they are under 10.

You have a few years more, unless the parents move; or you do.

I think it's a bit more than that, though. It's the disregard for land that isn't common land or a public street, but land which is owned by individual houses and is open plan.

It's the risk of balls and toys hitting/damaging private property.

It's the fact that the parents don't seem to,care what their children are doing, that might be a nuisance to the neighbours.

All that coupled with the noise does not make for a stress-free time.

I think if it were just children being noisy in their own gardens, it wouldn't be such an issue.




Edit. My post crossed with Pastures'

Tahlullah

Pyxis wrote: »

I think it's a bit more than that, though. It's the disregard for land that isn't common land or a public street, but land which is owned by individual houses and is open plan.

It's the risk of balls and toys hitting/damaging private property.

It's the fact that the parents don't seem to,care what their children are doing, that might be a nuisance to the neighbours.

All that coupled with the noise does not make for a stress-free time.

I think if it were just children being noisy in their own gardens, it wouldn't be such an issue.




Edit. My post crossed with Pastures'

I actually think we are on the same page, just coming at it from different ends.

If the properties were 'family' homes, then they would have child sized gardens and there would be access to park areas etc. Because the houses aren't designated or built for this purpose, then the people who move in with kids have to let them play somewhere. And where is there for them to play?

I genuinely don't think the parents know what effect they are having on their neighbours. Even if they did, it would be unreasonable to ask them to keep their children in their own 'non-existent' garden.

The mistake was renting the properties to families in the first instance, and so that lays with the owners. And the owners would rent to anyone who looks as if they will pay the rent and not destroy the property. Their primary purpose is to generate income from the property, not to consider the neighbours unfortunately.

You can have specific designated accommodation for 'over 50's or over 60's. If that owner chooses to move out, or unfortunately dies and someone else takes responsibility for the accommodation, they can potentially rent to whoever they wish. And that can be a family.

Yes, the lack of consideration is galling, but I don't see it getting any better. And as Pastures says, when one moves out, someone else will move in.

Tahlullah

Sorry, Pastures you made me laugh. So un-PC!

Pyxis

I thought the houses did have gardens?

Even if they don't, or the gardens are very small, then I still don't think that means they can have carte blanche to run about over other people's property without permission. Sorry.

What do people who live in flats do with their children?
Presumably they take them out to parks and playgrounds.


The problem here is that on the one hand you have people who may not realise the property situation and see 'open-plan' as 'communal', and equally may not realise how much of a nuisance their children are being, and on the other hand you have older, reserved, possibly typically British 'mustn't get involved' neighbours, plus Pastures who has legitimate reasons why she cannot approach them.

The juxtaposition of these two camps does not bode well.

PasturesNew

Pyxis wrote: »

I thought the houses did have gardens?

Yes, all do. 2 beds 12'x25'. 3 beds 30'x25'.

Pyxis wrote: »

don't think .... they can have carte blanche to run about over other people's property without permission.

Exactly.

If I had any kids I'd want my own driveway so I could park my car and open the doors and get them and luggage and shopping in/out easily and safely for starters. That would be an option within this general area, it's not as if those who can afford to live in my bit are at the bottom end of the pecking order.... "last chance saloon" and all that.

Tahlullah

Pyxis wrote: »

What do people who live in flats do with their children?
Presumably they take them out to parks and playgrounds.

No, they allow them to run amok, playing football in the car park risking denting the cars. Doofing against the garage doors. Screeching kids climbing on top of the garage block roof and staring in the 1st floor flat windows.

No, they don't take the kids to the park. They let them play outside with no regard for the others who live in the block.