Should I subsidise others' meals?

Kim_kim

Petra_70 wrote: »

What an utterly bizarre post.

And what an utterly bizarre attitude.

I have never ever been invited ANYwhere and been expected to start peeling my own spuds and sprouts. Who invites people over to dinner and expects them to start chipping in with the preparation and cooking? How rude.

I would NEVER expect anyone to ask me to do that, and it's nothing to do with saying COMMAND ME. What on earth are you on about? :huh: When you ask people to dinner, they are your GUEST; you are MEANT to wait on them, not give them a list of chores FGS. I have literally never heard anything like this.

Similarly, if *I* was having a dinner party, I would never ever expect people to chip in and help. I have more respect for my friends and family than that. They are my guests, not my servants.

If I was asked to dinner and was treated like you & Thorsoak treat your guests, you would never have the pleasure of my company again.

I am baffled at yours/Thorsoak's attitude.

Genuinely.

I don't know anyone, anywhere who thinks like you. Like I said, me, and everyone I know, have more respect for our guests. To expect them to do what you are expecting is extremely rude.

I think Christmas at Elizabeths sounds fun.
If I have a dinner party I do everything.
But Christmas Day is different, it's a long haul day of feasting.
I'm going to my daughters where I'll cook.
If I went to another family member I'd help too, if family came to me they'd help.

maiasopohie

Umm... I'd always hope to prepare dinner if I was invited.Doesn't matter if it's Xmas or not. It's just kind to offer to help. They are providing the food so why wouldn't you offer to help?
This post has got away from the original one. Hopefully the original poster will come back with the whole story!
I'm home alone this xmas but invited out for Boxing Day. I'm so happy to be invited, but of course I'll help out. Expected or not

eleanorgansey

I think the best bet to do is a pot luck - if it hasn't already been mentioned. If everyone brings a dish, and one person organizes who brings what so you don't up with 10 of the same thing, that drastically cuts the cost of a holiday meal.

Kim_kim

eleanorgansey wrote: »

I think the best bet to do is a pot luck - if it hasn't already been mentioned. If everyone brings a dish, and one person organizes who brings what so you don't up with 10 of the same thing, that drastically cuts the cost of a holiday meal.

And perhaps most importantly for Christmas, it shares the work.

balletshoes

GobbledyGook wrote: »

A dinner party/meal at any other time of the year - if I'm hosting I do it all, but for us Christmas is different.

Christmas is a big family affair. It's only held at my house because I can fit everyone into the dining room. Everyone pitches in - some cook a dish, some who are staying over/travelling help out with the prep on Christmas Eve and some do the washing up. We all split the cost (I tried once to play the 'my house, my invitation, we'll pay' card and was roundly told off!) and everyone has a great day.

It stems from my Nana and her sisters all bringing various parts of the meal to Gr-Granny's on Christmas Day and the kids getting the job of washing up because no-one would have dreamed of leaving Granny to do it! The tradition has never changed, just that me and my cousin now have kids who can do the washing up.

Although maybe it's not weird (or rude) to us because we don't consider ourselves guests in each others homes - we're just family. Or maybe because I don't get the chance to invite them for Christmas dinner - they just assume they are coming and tell me what they're bringing (which will be the same as last year!).

I wonder how BIL's new GF will find her first Christmas Day with us now! The only person who never liked it was my MIL, but that was because she liked to "host" but her version of hosting was basically to ruin the food, boss people about and generally dictate to everyone. I can't be that rude, there's 15 of them coming this year!

your christmas day dinner with family is the same as mine, we're family, we help out, we all have our "jobs" to do to help get the dinner to the table on time etc, and all of us adults chip in with the cost. Its fun, raucous at times, but thats our family .