I am really struggling with christmas

whitewing

Boyfriends aunt & uncle

http://www.tesco.com/groceries/product/details/?id=278480834

The tin is gorgeous. I got it last year.

You can get a selection of cheeses too if you want/can afford it.

You could probably get the same for nan and grandad. All my older relatives love this kind of thing

missbiggles1

Moonbean wrote: »

I already brought most of the adults.

My oldest cousin - £10 voucher
My auntie - £10 voucher
My nan - a little something (I put £20 towards getting a laptop for her)
My younger cousins x2 - their parents by me socks & choc thats worth £2 but expect me to spen a lot and they always snub my parents (up to £5 each)
My boyfriends mum - I dont talk to her anymore really
My boyfriend sister - I dont talk to her anymore really
My boyfriend brother - I dont talk to him anymore really
My boyfriends Aunt & Uncle - They gave him a place to stay when his mum kicke him out
A girl in work - up to £15
Another girl in work - £15
£12 towards a girl in work bday present
Boyfriends nan - birthday present
Grandad C - toblerone
my "adoptive" aunt & uncle (parents close friends) - they always brought me something when i was younger

nan & grandad

Forget about your boyfriend's family, they're his responsibility, particularly when you don't speak to them anymore.

Why would you spend thirty quid on a couple of girls at work and only buy your grandfather a Toblerone? I think you need to take a close look at your priorities.

Al1x

Have you visited the boost your income section to find ways of earning vouchers? You could take a look at the money shed, there are loads of ideas how to earn extra on there.

Does your partner chip in with present buying?

How about looking for bargains or making mini hampers that look more expensive than they are?

A few years ago my sister bought her nieces some jewellery hangers from home bargains and some cheap bracelets and necklaces from primark. That could be a nice idea for yours cousins if you can find some cheap bits.

I wouldn't buy for people you don't talk to, seems a bit pointless. maybe wait to see if you have some money left over before buying them a tin of chocolates or a bottle of wine.

Moonbean

I'd spendefinitely £30 for girls in work because they'd spend the same on me.

My grandad doesn't want much , can't have much because of the size of their house. He likes sweets and not much else

edwink

duchy wrote: »

It takes one year of you refusing to play the game.

You can say No- and more and more people are doing so every year (and lots more wish they had the guts to do it) and give small thoughtful gifts just to the people who actually matter.

I think this is very well said. We did that years ago and it became easier for us that very Christmas. Now it is never mentioned and everyone has a good Christmas and does not expect much and some don't expect anything except a nice card from us. It has been that way for years now and we are so pleased that the financial strain was spoken about all those years ago.

I have a friend that does not have much money at all and the strain she puts herself under is awful to watch to be honest. She is mentally worn out by all the worry by the time it gets to Christmas day.

Who else is like me and limits their Christmas spending on presents etc.? A few other hands up might show the OP that they will not be the only one if they decide to do that in future.

mrgaz

for several years, when money is tight I have told everyone Im not doing christmas this year, no problems. i certainly would NOT consider getting into debt for what is quickly forgotten. As for work mates I never contributed to any present funds and nothing bad has happened to me and Im not in debt.

Moonbean

Next year I'm going to say token gifts to family but the kids get presents and obviously my parents and sister and partner.

I'm going to buy :
Grandparents, godparents and boyfriends family tins of busicuits or chocolates.

IrishRose12

OK a few ideas from Boots - which are all under £10 and in the 3 for 2 offer
These could cover aunts, gran, cousins etc.
http://www.boots.com/en/Garden-Collection-Soap-Set_1700512/
http://www.boots.com/en/Garden-Collection-Mini-Indulgence_1700514/
http://www.boots.com/en/Garden-Collection-Magnolia-Mini-Duo_1737639/
http://www.boots.com/en/Garden-Collection-Mini-Candle-Trio_1700518/
http://www.boots.com/en/Garden-Collection-Mini-Candle-Trio_1700518/
http://www.boots.com/en/Jack-Wills-Lip-Gloss-Stocking_1688809/
http://www.boots.com/en/Glitter-Babes-Nail-Polish-Set_1700642/
http://www.boots.com/en/Twinings-Tea-Selection_1719141/
http://www.boots.com/en/Jack-Wills-Set-of-3-Lip-Balms_1687910/
http://www.boots.com/en/Ted-Baker-Remarkable-Sparkle-Soap-Gift_1689268/

Or this http://www.boots.com/en/GHOST-The-Fragrance-Bauble-5ml_1757196/

£4.50 - not in the 3 for 2 but is big enough, and is pretty. Esp for the 2 work colleagues and oldest cousin you mentioned.


Me personally I wouldn't be buying the cousins - if you do, buy what is bought for you. 2 pairs of bed socks from Primark for £2 and a selection box from Poundland.

Boyfriends family - they'd be getting nothing - it's his family not yours so his responsibility. A card would be all they'd get from me. If not - Tescos are doing a box of Biscuits for £3.

For your adoptive aunt and uncle, grandparents - a bunch of flowers maybe?

Or how about cheap bottles of wine for each pair of adults. At the end of the day it's the thought that counts. And once it leaves your hands who cares if they like them or not lol

marmiterulesok

Moonbean wrote: »

I already brought most of the adults.

My oldest cousin - £10 voucher
My auntie - £10 voucher
My nan - a little something (I put £20 towards getting a laptop for her)
My younger cousins x2 - their parents by me socks & choc thats worth £2 but expect me to spen a lot and they always snub my parents (up to £5 each)
My boyfriends mum - I dont talk to her anymore really
My boyfriend sister - I dont talk to her anymore really
My boyfriend brother - I dont talk to him anymore really
My boyfriends Aunt & Uncle - They gave him a place to stay when his mum kicke him out
A girl in work - up to £15
Another girl in work - £15
£12 towards a girl in work bday present
Boyfriends nan - birthday present
Grandad C - toblerone
my "adoptive" aunt & uncle (parents close friends) - they always brought me something when i was younger

nan & grandad

Lots of good advice already Moonbean.

Christmas can quickly become a nightmare:'must do this','must do that',buy,buy,spend,spend.
It's really sad,but so easy to get sucked in.
It's like we're suddenly supposed to throw caution to the wind and spend all our hard earned money and more,because that's what's done now.Christmas isn't about money though.We all know that really,but it's worth reminding people.
It's definitely not worth getting into debt,so if people feel snubbed/hurt/offended,then tough.
The priority during this time is still you:that you have money to buy food until next payday,money for your bus fare etc,some spare cash in case of emergencies.
That's all that matters.

You have to reprioritize:if these people care about you in any way,they will respect you for being honest.If anything ,a token present should suffice..... a nice card with a heartfelt message is nicer than any gift.

Which of these people do you actually like and respect and in turn like and respect you too?Then maybe for these people,a token gift?

Be strong and take care of your needs first.

I would hate for you to waken up on the 26th with the awful realization that you have to survive until the end of January on next to nothing.

And,please,please,please don't even think about touching your savings.

Be strong.

Moonbean

This is a huge confidence thing for me to tRyan and be valued as the rest of my family. I feel like I been devided out from the family a little bit.

Should I take back the stuff I have and just do biscuits for the adults as a couple and some wine then the kids are done ?

I brought loads of sets for like 8.50 ?