Women who keep their married name YEARS after the divorce.

missbiggles1

notanewuser wrote: »

But it's not as a result of mum changing her name. That would have been my name whatever she did.

Why would it? You could equally well have been given her surname if she hadn't changed it on marriage.

Gloomendoom

fierystormcloud wrote: »

Not having a go. Just curious. Why do women keep the ex's name for many many years after the divorce?

My ex has kept my name (and the Mrs title too.)

She said she preferred it to her old one.

POPPYOSCAR

missbiggles1 wrote: »

Ms doesn't define you as married/unmarried - that's the whole point!

Yes quite. If you answer as Mrs. or Miss that defines you as married/unmarried that is why I always put Ms.


I am often referred to as Mrs a lot of the time as it would seem that if you are of a certain age you are assumed to be married!

missbiggles1

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

Yes quite. If you answer as Mrs. or Miss that defines you as married/unmarried that is why I always put Ms.


I am often referred to as Mrs a lot of the time as it would seem that if you are of a certain age you are assumed to me married!

Rather like the cooks in Upstairs Downstairs or Downton Abbey.:)

notanewuser

missbiggles1 wrote: »

Presumably that'll've put you on a mailing list somewhere.

You can't write a formal letter to someone without using a title. It's totally incorrect to write "Dear John or Mary Smith".

Then the only options need be Mr or Ms. I actually think the writing convention needs changing though. I'm more than happy not to be addressed with a title.

notanewuser

missbiggles1 wrote: »

Why would it? You could equally well have been given her surname if she hadn't changed it on marriage.

Because my mum felt it important that I had my dad's name.

Gloomendoom

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

I am often referred to as Mrs a lot of the time as it would seem that if you are of a certain age you are assumed to be married!

That's sort of how it works in France. When you are young, you get addressed as Mademoiselle until you reach a certain (non-specific) age when it changes to Madam.

Apparently, it can be quite deflating when it starts to happen.

Jagraf

notanewuser wrote: »

How so? My daughter has her dad's name for her surname (mine is a middle name) but I've never used anything but my name. Mum wished she hadn't changed hers - been married to dad for 40+ years - so used it professionally. She's known as both, but I have my dad's name as my surname.

Because your mums name doesnt figure anywhere in your name, showing an imbalance in family connection, which is what you wanted to avoid. You can't help that as it was someone else's decision, but using your maiden name is putting your dads family higher up the pecking order than your mums.

missbiggles1

notanewuser wrote: »

Then the only options need be Mr or Ms. I actually think the writing convention needs changing though. I'm more than happy not to be addressed with a title.

That would be fine for most of us but there are other appropriate titles in general use like Dr. or Rev. without getting into the world of the aristocracy.

Jagraf

missbiggles1 wrote: »

My father's mother was unmarried (:eek:) so my original name (I will not say maiden name!) has come down to me from a woman.:)

Naughty