Dad Is Leaving Me Out Of Will

POPPYOSCAR

MatthewAinsworth wrote: »

Children don't ask to be brought into this world and my reason for doing so is so that he'll live a happy life, I'm putting him through a world of work and bullying in places and I feel I owe it to him to make it worthwhile

I want my son & any future children to have a better and happier life than me, there is no point having children if a parent won't make the effort for life

We all want what is best for our children and that is not always financial.

System

Definitely though I think there must be a reason for whatever happened and I'd hope judgement would be reserved

pigpen

My response would be..

'you will need me before I need you.. bye'

why are you putting yourself through the agony f trying to maintain a relationship with him? Either he is a nutter or you are either way... cut your losses and go.. what's the point in being miserable over something that might never come to pass.. you might be dead next week and he might live to be 120 in which case none of this even matters.. get on with your life!!

and your mums headstone.. tell him to go swivel and use your 'inheritance' to pay for it

System

Pigpen - easier said than done, only get 1 set of parents and the hope never dies that you'll resolve it someday, there would be regret if a child walked away and gave up of missed chances

pigpen

MatthewAinsworth wrote: »

Pigpen - easier said than done, only get 1 set of parents and the hope never dies that you'll resolve it someday, there would be regret if a child walked away and gave up of missed chances

no.. it's not.. you just do it to save your sanity.. I've not spoken to my dad for 11 years.. and I have never looked back.

Some parents are just crap.. my older childrens 'perfect parent' hasn't spoken to our older children for 2-4 years and they are for the most part more settled, happier and enjoying life way more than when he was in it being emotionally and physically abusive.. he is a fruitcake!! He actually walked past one of our children in the street last week and didnt recognise her!!! How disgusting is that?!

There i no regret.. how can you possibly regret ensuring your own happiness.. the realisation you will never be good enough and the abuse will always continue is hard but placing them out of your life is not.

System

You're a strong person pigpen, and your case must've been compelling
My parents I get on with, but they refuse to meet my partner, and therefore don't see my son (she fears them). Fault is on both sides, and I have a tough balancing act

Keep_pedalling

Time to cut your losses and move on. Do not give in to what sounds like emotional blackmail over the headstone, go you own way and forget the man, his loss is likely to be greater especially when his is elderly and looking for support and you are not there for him.

Forget the will unless he lives in Scotland and owns property in which case you would currently have a claim on that, but not any of his liquid assets.

Poppie68

MatthewAinsworth wrote: »

Sad to hear and unfair, should be contestable. Inheritance can sometimes be the only way we can help our own children on the housing ladder

My mother left everything to my sister...... I didn't care then and have never thought of it since it happened 6 years ago..... it was never my money!

If grandchildren can't get on the housing ladder without the help of an inheritance then that failure falls to the kids not because of the lack of someone else's money.....Or maybe the failure is the parents for not thinking of the future when a child grows up?

SailorSam

bluelass wrote: »

Also he expects me to fork out £5000 for my mothers headstone.

I've just been watching ....'Shoppers guide to saving' on C4. They were looking at where the money goes when you have a funeral. They said the average price of a headstone in the Uk is £900. It can vary 'cos the price changes the number of letters they need to carve out in your name.

System

. Or maybe the failure is the parents for not thinking of the future when a child grows up?

To be honest if you start from zero you'll struggle to house the children yourselves let alone pass money down, inheritance comes too late to help the immediately next generation onto the ladder but not too late for grandchildren, so what we do now is providing for grandchildren, not so much immediate children