Wife cheating, just about to buy a house

Kendall80

nearlysingle wrote: »

Well it was an interesting evening and I notice a few things that I hadn't before, also think the paranoia is setting in now.

We met our friends and we decided to have a sit down meal at Nando's. So whilst us men did the hunter gatherer thing at the Coke fountain, I glanced back and noticed my wife texting.

Then after coming back to the table, she then waited a couple of minutes and went to the loo with her handbag. Now I know it isn't handbag time of he month so I can only assume she made a call or sent a text.

I was hoping when we came back to have a sneaky look at her phone but she has decided to go upstairs and watch goggle box so I am sat here nearly in tears.

I don't know what to do.

I know the Piri Piri is hot but that is terrible!


Assuming... and this is a 'huge' assumption, that you re being serious. Dont worry about it. I've been married for 16 years, have 2 lovely young boys and if wifey was to do such a thing - quite frankly i'd be glad for the spare time!

robatwork

nearlysingle wrote: »

Then after coming back to the table, she then waited a couple of minutes and went to the loo with her handbag. Now I know it isn't handbag time of he month so I can only assume she made a call or sent a text.

I don't want to bring an end to a thread that has amused and delighted many on the coldest night of the year, but "handbag time of the month"?

This is becoming more poorly written than a Jackie Collins bodice ripper. It's time to admit that the OP saw no pants, CK or otherwise. It's a fairly average cry for attention which seems to have succeeded. Good luck in Devon, and don't forget to change your username to finallysingle.

moneyistooshorttomention

...and misspickle changes her name to "Igotlucky" (or maybe "WhathaveIletmyselfinfor?")

ultimatefighter

thesaint wrote: »

Pretend to go out next Wednesday, but instead hide under the bed.

I must say I would notice if I didn't put my boxers on after a afternoon session with someone else's wife.

This exactly.... And for it to be UNDER AND NOT beside the bed?

neet87

You have missed an excellent opportunity last night. You could have gone up to her with something that will spill well under the bed, for example a bag of scrabble letters (giving you the perfect alibi too as you could pretend to ask her to play) and then accidently drop them so that they fall under the bed and ask her to help you pick them up. She would hopefully then spot the boxers in-situ and you could gage her reaction, or even worry her some more by joining her on the floor and reach under the bed, pulling out the boxers with a flourish. Maybe a course of action to consider tonight when she retires to bed? This may of course spook her out of putting her inheritance into a property.

My other advice would be to sell the Range Rover, hide the cash offshore then buy a much cheaper car, the £500 with a years MOT type, then she is much less likely to want to drive off into the sunset with it. To avoid her being suspicious you can tell her that you want to buy a very hard to find car and want to be ready as a cash buyer when such car comes onto the market but still need a car. Maybe someone else could recommend such a car? Upon divorce, if this is bought up you can then claim to have spent the money cheering yourself up after your loss. Depending on the type of Range Rover, this should go a fair way to make up for your loss of her inheritance.

That said, I was always under the impression that her assets, including the inheritance, would be split too.

deaston

nearlysingle wrote: »

Well it was an interesting evening and I notice a few things that I hadn't before, also think the paranoia is setting in now.

We met our friends and we decided to have a sit down meal at Nando's. So whilst us men did the hunter gatherer thing at the Coke fountain, I glanced back and noticed my wife texting.

Then after coming back to the table, she then waited a couple of minutes and went to the loo with her handbag. Now I know it isn't handbag time of he month so I can only assume she made a call or sent a text.

I was hoping when we came back to have a sneaky look at her phone but she has decided to go upstairs and watch goggle box so I am sat here nearly in tears.

I don't know what to do.

How do you know your wife doesn't come onto these forums...?

I've been cheated on. I found out, we chatted and I forgave. Two years later, with the rot well and truly set-in (because I never fully trusted them again), I finally ended it. Splitting the house etc. was a pain, but I so wish I'd done it the day I found out.

If the relationship is over, end it.

racing_blue

Could the CK boxers be YOUR Christmas present? From a charity shop maybe, good housekeeping that is.

You should give your wife a back rub and a cup of tea.

[Deleted User]

Rather than coming on here.., you really do need to speak to the other person.., your wife. Only she can say if and why. Then you can decide what to do about the house purchase.

But even if she has been having an affair (possibly since the other time you saw something).., she's still with you. Why? Either she can't afford to move out or she still loves you, but isn't getting what she needs out of the relationship (and I'm not just talking physically here), or she needs a different kind of relationship. You need to find out which so you can make an informed decision. There's no point in both of you being prisoners in a relationship that may be over. And only you and your wife can make that decision (whether its over).

Is it really worth putting up with what you've been experiencing over the last few days for the sake of getting a few extra grand out of the new house? You don't even know if you will. Even if you spoke to a solicitor.., they can be wrong, they can over inflate things.., and then there's their high fees to pay if you decide to fight and your wife fights back. Its sounds like it would be a very expensive battle.., can you afford to pay the ongoing solicitors fees? These fees can be overwhelming.

Have a talk with your wife, seek counselling if you need to and walk away if that's what you decide. Minimise your losses (which may be enormous anyway) and it will help you start again if you need to. Yes you earned more, and she earned less so contributed less to the 'community' purse. But you've been happy with that for years, you were happy with the 'deal' you two agreed on (it was a compromise you were willing to make), so just walk away rather than adding to your turmoil by allowing feelings of being hard done by to seep in.., you were happy with the arrangement at the time. You can't change the past. You can change your future. And I suspect there is a happier one out there with less compromises (and less dogs lol).

Brown_Eyed_Girl

I think I've worked out the identity

Was it professor plum, with the Calvin's in the Bedroom?

I'm sorry you're going through w difficult time OP but I think as others have said, you need to have a conversation. Maybe starting with asking if you are both happy is the way to go. You want her to be honest but you're willing to sneak around to catch her out. Just talk.

Birdman2015

I think the OP has mistaken this for the Dear Deidre column.

Mind you, have you ever seen Martin Lewis and Deidrie in the same room?:rotfl: