Daring Myself to do this

rainbowskies

I'm really sorry about your sister. Maybe it bothers her that you're actually making the effort to do something positive, that you're actually taking control of your life and in the long run, making things better for yourself and your family? Keep doing what you're doing and don't let her get to you. I know, easier said than done!

There's nothing like putting the Christmas tree up! I really do love this time of year. We bought one last Christmas. On the box it said that it was 6 foot tall but when we got it home, it was so spindly and sparse! Going to treat ourselves to a beast next year, lol.

Have a good MSE week! xx

Kitten868

Hello! I forget about my diary going on everyone else's.

No, I know she's just a miserable cow. I'm a happy optimistic person (despite appearances on here sorry) so we don't see things the same way.

So it's Monday. Always plan so much for Monday's and never do it. Not even sent my eBay parcels yet! Need to package them up but kids won't let me. I have a two page list of to dos but not even looked at it today. Once it's done my bedroom is going to look brilliant. Down to the bare bones in the eBay box and just that printer that needs shifting. My house pongs an all. Blooming two smelly baby bums filling up the bin. Wouldn't change it though and my mums coming round tomorrow so I can take the bins out
Playgroup went so well. Playing with other children really well and I got to talk to people!! And they're going to do nativity dress up closer to Christmas!! So cute!! I put us down for angels.
Trying to work out when to make the gingerbread house. I'm thinking Friday. Never done one before and I'm so excited!!
Budgets been blown. Was told yesterday Santa is bringing sing along elsa by my little girl. Bought it in a total panic as its one that sells out. So cute when she showed me how she'd sing with it. Hope it'll bring her talking on. And have been talked into buying presents for everyone. Don't see why we need to bother buying rubbish for each other that we don't want. I know I'm a grinch but Christmas for me is kids and food and religion.
Best be off dd2 just woke up x

AspiringButAnxious

Hi Kitten,

Your sister sounds like a prize b!tch. I wish people like that would keep their opinions to themselves. What's the point of wasting money? Even if I had loads, I still wouldn't shop in Waitrose — when you can buy good quality food cheaper elsewhere, the money is best allocated to something worthwhile. At least your thriftiness benefits you, your family and others. Materialism benefits only the rich business owners who provide all the tat to buy! It makes me sick to think of how much money and how many resources I used to waste just by buying what I neither needed nor particularly wanted.

It can be difficult readig other people's diaries when their income is a lot more than your own, but you can still extrapolate ideas and money saving tricks. I get about £5200 a year (long term health problems, so living on ESA) and owe well over double that, but I think the trick is to focus on your own situation and find what works for you. That's true whether you earn £5000 a year or £50,000. Good luck in finding and doing what works for you and well done on all the ebaying — I feel too intimidated to try it, especially since I think it may exacerbate my anxiety, so you are doing really well.

Have to disagree with you on Xmas though — I don't spend much on my friends, but I like to get stuff which they can have fun or pamper thenselves with, especially if they wouldn't buy it themselves. One of my friends enjoys trying different whiskies, for example, but spending £12-5 on a box of miniatures seems too extravagant when she could buy a bottle of her favourite whiskey for not much more — yet she loves getting different types as a gift, so I like taking the opportunity to give her a different taste experience. It's just my way of showing my friends how much I love them and telling them that they deserve a treat I love all the goodwill that surrounds Xmas and giving gifts alllows me to engage in it, whereas my mental health problems prevent me from doing other Xmas activities.

Good luck with your MSE journey!

Kitten868

Thank you for popping by. I'm sorry to moan on here. She has confidence issues and making me feel like rubbish makes her feel better so I let her. Then I have to moan somewhere... Normally to hubby but he's so busy. I think he's sent me 4 text messages all week poor guy.

I find eBay easier than Facebook as you don't have to meet, you just post it. Does that help you? I don't know what your particular anxiety is sorry I know it affects everyone different so I don't want you to think I'm generalising. Plus I've found the decluttering great for my mental state. As well as money for credit cards while I'm on SMP. Builds the momentum for me rather than waiting for paydays.
I know we're all different and at different times in our lives. Just very jealous of people paying off £40k quicker than I pay off £6k. Made so much progress at the beginning and it's really dropped off.
The parcels are gone except for a couple as the tape ran out. I've managed to screw up on two listings this week. Wrong photos on the wrong listings. I really need to get more sleep!! I feel like such an idiot.
Hitting my under £2000 target seems impossible. So I'm giving myself til the 0% runs out. I have no idea what I'll do with that debt next. So by feb 1st it needs to be under £2000. I don't even want to know what the balance is today. But I'll go look :-/ xx

Kitten868

And I know I'm a Scrooge but my family are the 'have you still got the receipt?' Variety xxx

chanie

Hi kitten,

I've read you diary and I promise to subscribe so I can keep up.

With regards to your sister, I think the best thing to do is not tell her what you are doing. If she is childless, she is likely to have a much larger disposable income than you and if het financial situation changes, she'll be knocking on your door for advice.

Kitten868

Hello! I'm still rubbish at this. Thanking all over the place and not thanking who I should. And I don't know how to subscribe but I'm getting there
My diary is boring but I think it's all about plodding along so it's ok.
Found someone on here who's aiming to be a sahm which is what I'll have to do soon. It's great finding people in a similar boat.
Oh yea sisters minted. Holidays and new clothes and savings. But like they say, Can't buy happiness.
I'll be popping over xx

Rebecca01

Hi Kitten

Sorry to read about your sister. Ignore her and stay positive. There really is more to life.

I was a SAHM for five years it is not without its challenges but I am flad I had the opportunity. If I were to ever have anymore I don't think I would get the chance this time. So enjoy it all.

AspiringButAnxious

Never apologise for moaning on here! I don't think you should let your sister treat you like that — it's making you feel bad and affecting your happiness. It sounds like it could even be a form of emotional abuse. Neither do I think it does her any good: if anything, accepting her attacks will reinforce her beliefs about what makes people valuable anc their lives worthwhile, which will do her confidence no favours in the long term.

If it's easier for you to just nod along and ignore her, do that by all means, but please don't excuse her behaviour by making excuses and pretending that being a verbal punchbag is helping her in some way. As someone who continues to struggle with confidence issues, I know that criticising other people makes me feel worse after the initial release. It's destructive behaviour, which is the last thing anyone with low self-esteem needs to participate in.

I think perhaps the best way to deal with your sister is to just cut her off by saying something like "that's your opinion, but doing this in my own way is important to me." It's what I ended up doing with certain relatives who emotionally abused me throughout my childhood and teens — it proved very effective! Even if she doesn't take any notice, by stating your point of view you are disengaging from her criticism and reminding yourself that you have different values and priorities. That's pretty powerful.

chanie

Your diary isn't boring,is all about you!!! I do mine for me. It's early days, but writing it all down does help to focus my mind.

My children are a bit older than yours at 5 and 3 and they are becoming a bit less demanding physically. The early years were tough with two,but it does get easier.