Money Moral Dilemma: Is it OK to let my rich friends pay for me?

duchy

Maybe you should ask for a payrise from MSE or look for a better paying job

pendragon_arther

Petra_70 wrote: »

Well I would definitely not let ANYbody fund me. I am no charity case, and would not ever want to be beholden to someone, who will possibly throw it back in my face at some time in the future, or 'expect' something from me, if my financial situation improved, and theirs got worse.

I would also feel that they had some kind of hold on me, and I believe (rightly or wrongly) that they would feel more powerful and somewhat superior to me, because they were paying for their pauper mate.

All I would ever do - and this would be unlikely and rare - is borrow money which I would pay back; with interest.

But no WAY would I let people pay for me, not for anything.

You have a strange skewed view on life I feel.


OP, if they're happy doing it then fine. In life there's givers and there's takers then there's giver/takers. Some folk like to give because it makes them feel good. They obviously enjoy your company and probably want to be philanthropists because they have it and want to redistribute the wealth and why not to one of their friends. That's why your Paul Gettys and Bill Gates want to give after taking so much to balance things out.

Good luck to you.

VfM4meplse

This made me think....I have a friend in this position who never minds being subsidised, and orders away with gay abandon. I on the other hand am very careful about what I order, as I hate waste. The fact is I'm not happy to pay for her expensive tastes, or her waste. Time to tell her - next time she can treat me!

Anyone who takes their friends for mugs, be warned. It is noticed and it certainly isn't appreciated.

ceecee1

Reported this stupid hypothetical question as spam

JSS

Petra_70 wrote: »

Is there really any need for this?

If you're not interested in the thread, then don't post on it.

Your comments to MSE Nick are just rude and uncalled for!

I agree with Petra

selement

I can see why it's make you uncomfortable all the time, you don't want to be seen as the sponging friend. It sounds like they genuinely want your company and don't want to let you use money as an excuse not to do things! I think they mean well and it's really generous. I'd maybe be tempted to let them if that's what they want to do, but keep offering to pay if you can afford it.

Jagraf

My brother does this. I love him to bits and he is extremely generous, but I see some of the things he does as a waste of his money, let alone mine. I hate him handing over wads of cash on everyone's behalf. "I saw you coming" comes to mind.

74jax

If I asked a friend if they fancied meeting up and they said they would love to but couldn't afford it at the moment, I'd offer straight away to pay. My friend would do the same to me.

We don't keep tabs, so friend A paid last time I now owe this time and also friend B owes from six months ago....

I was in a shop at weekend and we were waiting for a cashier, one came available and I just took my friends stuff and said I'll just get them at my till to save time, but we don't think anything of it.

If it wasn't a close friend, I doubt I'd have done that.

Depends how close you are, if you can invite them to your home to return the favor etc.

pollypenny

Never.

We had this with a friend who was well off when we were hard up. We'd always pay our way, to the point that we had to stop going out with them and the friendship faded away,

JerryW

Simply isn't right, sorry...