Quit everything , and start again over 50?

gallygirl

Thinking about you and your family LL xx

another_casualty

lessonlearned wrote: »

AC. I don't get this "I'm just unlucky".

You are doing well, there's absolutely no need now to keep thinking of yourself as a victim, at the mercy of fate.

You are now the master of your own destiny.......so grab hold of those reins and take charge.

You have ditched the job and the boss from hell, you have more than enough money to pay back the debts you owe in full. You are merely trying to negotiate yourself a deal.

There's no need to be going to great long garbled explanations about the state of your bank balance. Just make them an offer and then wait and see. If you need to up your offer then so be it. They do not need to see your bank statements, you do not need to do a means test. You don't need to discuss anything with them.

Dont tie yourself in knots over this. Just Get a deal if you can, pay up and then move on. No one is trying to screw you over. They just want to get back as much as they can, just as you want to get away paying back as little as you can.

Stop fretting and torturing yourself, Reach a compromise, settle up And then get on with your life. However, I agree with Harz - Don't be in a mad rush, you are likely to get a better deal if you play it cool. You have a strong hand so play it well.

Dad not doing too well at all. Tbh I just want it to be over. DS2s girlfriend is a nurse and she asked how he was doing. As she so succinctly put it - we wouldn't put a dog through this.

Sorry again about your dad LL

I didn't mean to sound so needy . I do sound whiny
I'll do nothing until the review , which is Jan / Feb time .
When I read posts from others about negotiations I never heard about the forms the creditors send back to you . I thought that payplan could see what's in your bank acct etc.
Sounds better the way yourself and harz put it .
I've just dot to give myself a break and get on with it .
Thanks
Thanks

MrsPorridge

So sorry to hear your news LL.

another_casualty

Btw: a few people have the flu that I have at the moment.
Normally , I just get on with it .
Today rescheduked viewing with estate agents .
I will get groceries . Will knock on my friends door ( wife should. E in)
and will leave his present outside .
Then back to bed

dreaming

Agree with what others have said- just hold your nerve AC. Of course no-one can see your bank account, and when it comes to revealing financial stuff to others less is definitely more IMO. I know you feel a bit rotten at the moment, and on top of your MG and the roller-coaster of the last few weeks with moving etc. it is tempting to feel a bit panicky but just give yourself the next couple of weeks to get better again and then take the advice offered here (and on your other thread), or don't take it. The choice is yours.


LL - thoughts are with you.

lessonlearned

AC Sorry to hear you are still struggling with the lurgy. Yeah go back to bed, sleep it off.

Well I have cancelled my hair appt....I just can't face being pulled about today. I'm a mass of aches and pains .......just stress, nothing sinister. And hospital chairs don't help.

Luckily Physio tomorrow. I've been a bit remiss and haven't been stretching so I'm not helping myself really.

I too need to shop, put up the Christmas tree and the house is a tip. My bedroom is a disaster area, and the study has become a dumping ground. Hey ho.....it's not important, it will get done by and by.

We are still hoping dad can come home for a bit longer but I'm guessing that the timescales for his prognosis mean we will need to think about a hospice sooner rather than later.

I don't want him to die in hospital. He has been placed on the presurgical Ward because there were no beds in haematology so it's not ideal where he is.

The staff are great but they are so overstretched. I really feel for them, most of them are doing 12 hour shifts. They are so overworked, it has to be seen to be believed. It's just not right.

The whole hospital seems to be bursting at the seams. As you say AC flu season is upon us and services are very stretched.

AC stay warm, rest and sleep, plenty of fluids. Don't fret over "stuff" - watch some Christmas c r a p on the TV, listen to music.

You've had an incredibly busy and stressful year, tiime to just kick back and give yourself time to recuperate. Your body is telling you "no more" - you need to listen.

I plan to do exactly that Once things are back on an even keel here......"after". Iyswim.

This will be the third death in around 2.1/2 years I've had to deal with. Sounds awful I know but I've had enough. I just want to put it all behind me and look forward to better times.

lessonlearned

Just had a call from the hospital. They want a meeting. Hey ho.

Good job I cancelled the hairdresser.

dreaming

Really feel for you LL. I think you are of a similar age to me when it does seem that there are more funerals than weddings.
My youngest is a nurse and she is absolutely shattered all the time. As she says - you don't just leave work at the end of your shift if someone is in pain/dying/relatives need help (although apparently some do). She doesn't even get overtime pay (and their pay has been frozen for the last few years) - just time off in lieu. But of course, with the staffing shortages it is hard to take the time off that she is owed. Luckily she has 4 days off for Xmas this year but most of that will be spent sleeping I think.

wendym

I got really stroppy with my GP surgery after they re-chaired the waiting room with the same hospital chairs. I asked why they hadn't thought of some lumbar support. Their response was "but these new ones are incredibly expensive".

Today is/was trifle making day here, for twins visit tomorrow. I very efficiently had an Ocado order yesterday evening. Fortunately the bag that seemed to be full of blood was full of beetroot juice, but the bag that seemed to be full of cream was full of cream. And had split and leaked cream into many gaps in a quarry tiled floor. Should you ever need to know, it doesn't rinse off packaging. CS were horrified, refunded the ruined stuff, and said the new staff employed for Christmas clearly needed re-training. Because you would need specialist training in not putting two pots of cream at the bottom of a bag.

LL - I have never been so unprepared at this stage, and I don't have your excuse. I do now have a small tree - artificial for the first time - 'decorated' in what I am calling retro-minimalist style.

So far today I have stared pointlessly at my list. Shall we all have a day off?

ETA Sorry you now can't relax today LL.

Smodlet

I am sorry for your situation, LL but agree with the nurse, sorry. Once quality of life is gone, all that is left is suffering. I hope you dad is not in too much pain.

Hope you feel better soon, AC. I know you just want things done and dusted but that can be very expensive; once you've thrown money at a problem you can't get it back. Just hold your nerve. Either your creditors will take what they can get (who knows, they might have targets they are supposed to hit before Xmas) or they won't. It will all be sorted soon enough and in the meantime, stressing will accomplish absolutely nothing except to ruin your day, so please try not to.

S x