Children at weddings...

I know this is an age old question that there have probably been many discussions about but this is really starting to get me down.

Every wedding (apart from 2) that I have been to have been adult only affairs. The first one I went to was when I was 3 and a neice of the groom and so was a flower girl. The other wedding was my best friends a couple of years ago and she has 2 children.

My H2B has 2 nephews and a niece, I have no problem inviting these 3. We see them every single week and they all know us. My problem lies with his cousins daughter (who I have met once and is 3) and my cousins son and daughter (who are 2 and a baby). We have seen my cousins children probably once every month/6 weeks but they still don't know who we are (obvious with the baby).

I don't want them 3 coming to the wedding as they have no idea who we are and us them. They won't enjoy sitting through the service and just disrupt things.

My mum is of the same opinion.

My H2B aunt died 11 years ago and would be the grandmother of his cousins daughter. Last week my sisters in law to be were very horrible to me over the issue of not inviting them and told me I was insulting the memory of their aunt. This is so far from true and caused a really large argument. I was under the impression that this was sorted after they apologised but a few days later I find out that they had been talking to their mum about it and me behind my back.

My H2B want's to invite them as well. I had said before that I would compromise and they would be invited for the day only as long as no one else has another child by then.

After everything that has since happened I really don't want to invite them. Not out of spite but because why should I have something I don't want on my wedding day. I haven't even told my mum about the argument and what happened after as the sisters would hardly be invited, let alone the child.

Any time me and my H2B talk about this it ends in an argument. It's really starting to get me down as I don't want to talk to him about it. My mum told me yesterday though that if I don't want them there then not to invite them, it's my parents footing the bill and therefore doing the inviting at the end of the day.

I know those of you who have children will object but if I knew these children I wouldn't have so much of an issue. My thoughts are still that a wedding is an adult affair but I could accept it. We both know our best friends children better than the cousins so shouldn't it be them who are invited instead?!

I just needed somewhere to put these thoughts down I think...
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