My friend needs your help, wife threatening to take everything!!

duchy

Not now he's gonna be broke anyway
In all seriousness unless she is a lot younger than him (ie has significant number of working years before 60) the courts may very well decide he has a responsibility to continue to support her either through maintanance, pension share or a combination of both in addition to an asset split. He really needs to find out where he stands with proper legal advice.

Feisty_Fairy

Why does everone automatically start bad mouthing the husband?:T , when he has done nothing wrong except love this woman all the time they have been married and give her everything she has ever wanted in order to keep her happy, in return he has had nothing but nagging and complaining that they never 'do' anything as he was working 6/7 days a week running THEIR business!

She has never been a particularly affectionate woman and he put up with that too for over 40 years, she was 'homemaker' yes but that also almost stopped 10 years or so ago, she does look after the house in a fashion but all she cooks now is microwave- ready meals etc, she spends more time looking after her dog!:eek:

This poor man has done everything she has ever wanted for her and has even continued to work after she made him sell his business and last home to up sticks and move to the country, so he did this and has to continue to work to support them both, he is now retired (company policy) and is now looking for another job because they cant manage, if he had kept his business another 4/5 years to now and also his house he would have sold his house for more that triple what he bought it for and be financially stable but he did what SHE wanted and sold his house for the same amount they bought their current home for!:eek:

Come on peeps this man is the most un-selfish person i know, cut him some slack!

Feisty_Fairy

:rotfl:

Clive_Woody wrote: »

I think you may have just won the award for the most rude and ignorant post 2007. :T

Normally these are seperate awards, but thanks to the dross you posted above you have demonstrated just how deserving you are of both these titles.

:rotfl: :T :rotfl: :T :rotfl: :T :rotfl:
I AGREE, WELL SAID!!!!
:rotfl: :T :rotfl: :T :rotfl: :T :rotfl:

Clive_Woody

Feisty_Fairy wrote: »

:rotfl:


:rotfl: :T :rotfl: :T :rotfl: :T :rotfl:
I AGREE, WELL SAID!!!!
:rotfl: :T :rotfl: :T :rotfl: :T :rotfl:

I think some of the bra burning loonies can work themselves up into quite a frenzy at the drop of a hat. You only have to mention that a man feels a bit hard done by and off they go foaming at the mouth while typing out their crazed rants. Heaven forbid they stop and listen and actually figure out that raw deals work both ways, and that a man can be hard done by by his wife when it comes to seperation.

While none of us know this gent as well as you do, too many have immediately jumped to conclusions, and in the case of the poster I replied to were down right rude to you. You asked for advice and recieved abuse which I believe is contrary to the terms and conditions of using these message boards.

I don't have a great deal of practical advice other than to echo what others have said about advising your friend to speak to somebody who knows more about this sort of thing, either CAB or a solicitor. Most of all they should try and keep things as amicable as possible otherwise the only winner will be the solictors with their nice big fees when it all gets drawn out.

teacup_2

I dont think tao should have said " go post some where else" , but as I said I think the post was meant mockingly .
I am a bra burning loonie( female), and I dont take offence to that as I have a cracking sense of humour!!.I am not thick skinned , just full of humour and open to different views, everyone to their own.:rotfl:
I dont think any one has jumped to conclusions but like I said offered a view, another side to think about merely.
Also as I said I think tones can be read in to things, ie the same as text messaging depending on what mood you are in when you receive them(if you know what I mean )

Clive_Woody

teacup wrote: »

Also as I said I think tones can be read in to things, ie the same as text messaging depending on what mood you are in when you receive them(if you know what I mean )

I agree people really should try not to read 'tones' into people's posts, but when somebody asks for advice and gets the following response...

you ought to feel throughly ashamed of yourself?!!............

followed by...

We don't need stupidity like this here?!!

and finally this little gem...

Go post somewhere else where you will be assured the company of your fellow philistines!

I don't think there really can be any mistake over the 'tone' of the reply.

The reply was petty, unhelpful and abusive and that was just the first few lines, it then descended into some silly little rant with very little understanding of the situation described.

I am pleased to hear you have a sense of humour, if only more people in the world did. :T :beer:

Ms_Piggy_2

I'm a feminist (aka Bra Burning Loonie :rotfl:) and I firmly believe that with rights come responsibility. One can't expect to have 'rights' and 'equality' without having responsibility. And that means showing some independence and not expecting someone else (whether male or female) to support them.

duchy

Ms_Piggy wrote: »

I'm a feminist (aka Bra Burning Loonie :rotfl:) and I firmly believe that with rights come responsibility. One can't expect to have 'rights' and 'equality' without having responsibility. And that means showing some independence and not expecting someone else (whether male or female) to support them.

I agree with rights come responsibility and I think it would extremely irresponsible to expect a woman (or man) who has supported the family by staying at home (with the agreement of BOTH parties) and worked within the home for 40 years and is likely at or past retirement age to enter the work force and become self supporting.
A marriage contract made forty years ago is a very different animal to one made today where there are different expectations on BOTH partners.

fay144

If your friend wasn't happy with the labour split between him and his wife, then he should have told her to get off her bum and get a job a long, long time ago.

After 40 years looking after the home, she is no in no position to walk away and start again independantly from zero, especially as she must be at retirement age now.

She has contributed to the partnership over 40 years, but even if she did absolutely nothing, that is the arrangement your friend agreed to. He can't just cut her loose when it no longer suits. A 50/50 split is totally fair in my opinion.

Errata

fay144 wrote: »

If your friend wasn't happy with the labour split between him and his wife, then he should have told her to get off her bum and get a job a long, long time ago.

After 40 years looking after the home, she is no in no position to walk away and start again independantly from zero, especially as she must be at retirement age now.

She has contributed to the partnership over 40 years, but even if she did absolutely nothing, that is the arrangement your friend agreed to. He can't just cut her loose when it no longer suits. A 50/50 split is totally fair in my opinion.

Spot on ! It takes two to tango. Clearly whatever the arrangements and decisions were over a period of 40 years they quite obviously suited both of them.