Shocked at my friend.

Indie_Kid

fierystormcloud wrote: »

One girl at work I know had a go at a colleague for saying 'black coffee' once!

Riciulous. I know that sometimes (it depends where I go) if I order coffee, I'm asked if I want it black or white. Sometimes, they will say "is that with milk?"

And an elderly colleague (63) got slaughtered because she said she had just popped to the little Indian shop on her street on the way to work for some milk. It's been run by Indians for 30 years, and they very good friends of hers, and they loved her, and loved to see her, and she had no issue with their race at all. But she got annihilated by 3 uber-PC girls in their 20s and 30s at work, because she said the 'wrong thing!'

How silly. We have a shop around here (which I can never remember the name of) which I always refer to as the Chinese shop.

fierystormcloud

Indie_Kid wrote: »

Riciulous. I know that sometimes (it depends where I go) if I order coffee, I'm asked if I want it black or white. Sometimes, they will say "is that with milk?"

How silly. We have a shop around here (which I can never remember the name of) which I always refer to as the Chinese shop.

Exactly! :T

As I said though, with some people, you can't say ANYthing!

Money_maker

So the absolute correct phrase to use for a person who is neither white nor black but their origin is not known is...?

zagfles

fierystormcloud wrote: »

I hate racism, and I'm not racist; I have lots of black friends.

But this constantly having to worry about what you say for fear of being jumped on is just absurd. I see posts on here all the time where someone is describing someone and they mention their skin colour, and you would think they killed someone!

Also, people get jumped on if they say the 'wrong thing;' ie' 'coloured' instead of 'black' or 'half caste' instead of 'mixed race' and then we are told it's not mixed race; it's 'dual heritage!' And yes, I also was also told we should say 'coloured' back in 80s, and that 'black' was rude! It was rude because they weren't actually black!

It's ridiculous, and it needs to stop, because it's fuelling racial tension. People are fed up of being afraid to say anything. One girl at work I know had a go at a colleague for saying 'black coffee' once! And an elderly colleague (63) got slaughtered because she said she had just popped to the little Indian shop on her street on the way to work for some milk. It's been run by Indians for 30 years, and they very good friends of hers, and they loved her, and loved to see her, and she had no issue with their race at all. But she got annihilated by 3 uber-PC girls in their 20s and 30s at work, because she said the 'wrong thing!'

But re the OP, your friend does sound a bit racist. Saying she is not being put first because she is not black is a bit silly and is also wrong.

I know some white people who are actually scared to interact with black people in case they say the wrong thing! I think the extremist morons you mention are fairly rare though, but they do exist, and sometimes in positions of power.

The professional offence takers are generally up their own backsides and just want to feel morally superior to others who don't use the "correct" terms, or want to demonstrate to their bosses or peers how "PC" they are.

I used to work with a guy from the West Indies who was here on secondment for a few months. He was born and had spent his whole life in the West Indies, so unsurprisingly, he had a strong West Indies accent. But, obviously surprisingly to a lot of ignorant Brits who associate skin colour with accent, he's white.

He had a few interesting stories about some of the morons he met - one time he was buying a train ticket and having to talk quite loud because the (black) ticket seller was behind a security screen, white guy behind him in the queue suddenly interrupts and accuses him of racism because he thinks he's imitating "the way black people talk" :rotfl:

cavework

My son was in a pub with friends.
They had been to a vintage toy fair and had bought a few items.
They were discussing old teddy bears and gollywogs.
Next thing the barman comes over and asks them to leave..
Son has no idea what is wrong until the barman points to a young woman sitting 2 tables away...behind him
apparently she had taken offence to the use of the word gollywog..accusing son and friends of aiming racist comments at her !
Barman explained it was easier to ask son to leave but he would be welcome back in the future.
Lady who complained got a free meal... not the first time she has pulled this stunt

jackieblack

Money_maker wrote: »

So the absolute correct phrase to use for a person who is neither white nor black but their origin is not known is...?

Person of unknown ethnic origin?

Petra_70

cavework wrote: »

My son was in a pub with friends.
They had been to a vintage toy fair and had bought a few items.
They were discussing old teddy bears and gollywogs.
Next thing the barman comes over and asks them to leave..
Son has no idea what is wrong until the barman points to a young woman sitting 2 tables away...behind him
apparently she had taken offence to the use of the word gollywog..accusing son and friends of aiming racist comments at her !
Barman explained it was easier to ask son to leave but he would be welcome back in the future.
Lady who complained got a free meal... not the first time she has pulled this stunt

OMG unbelievable! Why does this woman get away with this?! Someone should tell her to do one, or would she cry racism?

zagfles wrote: »

I know some white people who are actually scared to interact with black people in case they say the wrong thing! I think the extremist morons you mention are fairly rare though, but they do exist, and sometimes in positions of power.

The professional offence takers are generally up their own backsides and just want to feel morally superior to others who don't use the "correct" terms, or want to demonstrate to their bosses or peers how "PC" they are.

I used to work with a guy from the West Indies who was here on secondment for a few months. He was born and had spent his whole life in the West Indies, so unsurprisingly, he had a strong West Indies accent. But, obviously surprisingly to a lot of ignorant Brits who associate skin colour with accent, he's white.

He had a few interesting stories about some of the morons he met - one time he was buying a train ticket and having to talk quite loud because the (black) ticket seller was behind a security screen, white guy behind him in the queue suddenly interrupts and accuses him of racism because he thinks he's imitating "the way black people talk" :rotfl:

I can believe this because I used to know a man who was brought up in the Caribbean (a white man,) and he spoke with a strong Caribbean accent, and he was frequently lambasted for 'mocking black people.' It got to the point where he was scared to go out where he knew there would be black people. He went back there after 5 years. I think he had had enough!

And Zagles, there are plenty of professional offence takers unfortunately, and I agree with you saying "The professional offence takers are generally up their own backsides and just want to feel morally superior to others who don't use the "correct" terms, or want to demonstrate to their bosses or peers how "PC" they are."

I agree political correctness has gone mad, and I also get sick of worrying about what I say. And back in my day things were different too,and yes you did call someone coloured, not black.

fierystormcloud wrote: »

But this constantly having to worry about what you say for fear of being jumped on is just absurd. I see posts on here all the time where someone is describing someone and they mention their skin colour, and you would think they killed someone!

Also, people get jumped on if they say the 'wrong thing;' ie' 'coloured' instead of 'black' or 'half caste' instead of 'mixed race' and then we are told it's not mixed race; it's 'dual heritage!' And yes, I also was also told we should say 'coloured' back in 80s, and that 'black' was rude! It was rude because they weren't actually black!

One girl at work I know had a go at a colleague for saying 'black coffee' once! And an elderly colleague (63) got slaughtered because she said she had just popped to the little Indian shop on her street on the way to work for some milk. It's been run by Indians for 30 years, and they very good friends of hers, and they loved her, and loved to see her, and she had no issue with their race at all. But she got annihilated by 3 uber-PC girls in their 20s and 30s at work, because she said the 'wrong thing!'

But re the OP, your friend does sound a bit racist. Saying she is not being put first because she is not black is a bit silly and is also wrong.

This post reminds me of when my sister started work some ten years ago in a coffee shop. She was told explicitly that she must not say "black coffee'" just ask people if they want coffee with milk or without milk. In addition, I remember quite a few years ago (early 2000s, maybe 15 years back,) going for a drink with a friend, and she asked for two coffees, one black, one white, and the assistant said 'you mean one without milk and one with milk? When she said 'that is what I said, one black, one white,' the assistant said (snottily,) 'you can't say that!'

Ridiculous

I have also come across many other similar scenarios mentioned in the posts above.. People up their own backsides standing on the moral high ground, telling folk how bad they are for uttering the wrong terminology!

All this said, the original poster needs to speak to her friend if she is unhappy at the way she speaks.

GracieP

Just imagine how confusing it is in the Irish language. "Fear dubh," literally black man (but inverted as nouns and adjectives are in Irish) means 'the devil' so if you want to describe someone as a black man, you have to say "fear gorm" which literally means blue man.

Why it's not "fear donn," which means brown man and would be much more accurate than black or blue, is a mystery.

cavework

My son is a redhead...I really wish she had ordered a ginger beer ..LOL

as for 'person of unknown ethnic origin' being PC, to me it sounds too close to 'person of unknown parentage'
For the record.. I am pink , sometimes quite red, when I have been on holiday I sometimes get called brown with freckles.. I have never met a 'white' person in my life..

Person_one

Money_maker wrote: »

So the absolute correct phrase to use for a person who is neither white nor black but their origin is not known is...?

A person.

Or their name, ideally...