Men and women being friends

onlyroz

Having been to a uni that was 70% male, and having worked in IT for 8 years, I would be very lonely if I was unable to maintain platonic friendships with men. I have a number of close friendships with men, and there is no suggestion on either side that we will ever be anything other than friends. My husband is not threatened, and I am not threatened by his female friends.

Indie_Kid

I get along a lot better (and share their interests more) with males in general.

dashriprock

I think it depends if you fancy them or not... if you are instinctively attracted to another person it's difficult to remain just friends, unless you have a lot of will power.

AubreyMac

I have had male friends before who have wanted more, the friendship just cannot continue after that.

I have also had male friends and the friendship was good until he got a girlfriend who didn't like our friendship.

I'd have to be extremely desperate or highly drugged up to ever get together with my current male friends. Not because they are awful people but they are just not my type.

When someone ask about my weekend, I would say I've been out with 'a friend', not wanting to be mysterious but what's the point of naming them when they don't know them?

I have never been the one who wanted more from a male friend though.

One of my current best male friends has a girlfriend who he's madly in love with and wants to marry. She didn't like our friendship at first but has come to accept it. I think she has no right not to like it as we were friends before she came along. Her best friend happens to be male too.

comeandgo

My daughters wedding the best man was a girl, my son in laws best friend. Now I know them all I realise that the best friend would never be girlfriend material for my son in law, as he would never be her boyfriend material. So yes, friends of either sex are something to cherish.

Person_one

I wonder why you feel the need to correct people and tell them that your friends are male?

Of course men and women can be friends, we're all people, we're not two different species!

AubreyMac

Person_one wrote: »

I wonder why you feel the need to correct people and tell them that your friends are male?

If I said me and my friend went to the cinema and I enjoyed the film, someone may ask 'did she enjoy it too?' I will say 'he did enjoy the film as well'.

Why wouldn't I correct them?

pickledonionspaceraider

AubreyMac wrote: »

gets annoying as though I have to justify the friendship.

You have to justify anything to anyone.

If you don't want to explain yourself to people - don't.

No, it's not that unusual to be friends with a member of the opposite s/x but it is common for an attraction to occur - which is why people will assume. However, as above, don't feel you need to over explain.

A confident person doesn't need others approval

Cuilean

My best friend is male. Ten years ago, we met through a dating website which paired us up, but it was pretty obvious within five minutes of us meeting that there was no attraction whatsoever, and we abandoned drinks and dinner to go and find some new CDs and drink coffee until Costa's closing time.

Ten years on, we live 500 miles apart, we're both married to other people (He was my witness at my wedding), and his lovely wife and I are in touch daily. My husband isn't at all bothered, in fact I think he's relieved he doesn't have to put up with me falling out with girlfriends :laugh:

I've found my bestie a better friend than any female I've ever met. He's not interested in gossip, tells it how it is, and still recommends me CDs like he did ten years ago. Female friends have come and gone, but he's always been there for me. Be friends with whoever you want to - it's your choice, and you don't have to justify it to anyone!

System

If your physically attracted to them it makes things a bit awkward.