Ex Date Won't Give Me MY Money Back! Advise please

Gaz83

*Inhales sharply through teeth*

Fraise

Candyapple wrote: »

Clearly you don't understand sarcasm

So judging by your dates, day 14 of him having to respond to the pre court claim letter is this Monday, does that mean you sent him the pre court letter around third week of July? So him stopping talking to you happened circa mid July?

If he was genuine, 3 weeks is ample time to have paid you back. Also, what grown man in his 40s throws a strop to that extent? Is this extended lack of silence on his part supposed to teach you a lesson or something? :rotfl:

I don't understand how your friends still think he is genuine if he has treated you this way. He supposedly owns a business/es (delivery man business via eBay? selling/buying secondhand cars) has purchased or is about to purchase a flat, has business associates you've met so clearly he is paying staff wages as well, so why so hard up for such a small amount of money?

It doesn't really add up. The only logical conclusions are;
1. He is mentally unstable and has thrown the biggest strop but will pay up either if/when you visit his folks and he is embarrassed, or will pay up as soon as you send the proper court papers; the long wait period supposedly to teach you a lesson in trust(?) and to inconvenience you/being spiteful

2. He's a chancer/conman


What do you plan to do on Monday if he still hasn't responded? Are you going to visit his dad first or just go straight down the court route?

Oh, I understand sarcasm. It's the lowest form of wit and usually comes from those who've eaten sour grapes.....

You're wrong on the dates too....this happened just two weeks ago yesterday, and I sent him the letter on the Monday. So get your calculator out again.....

No, we haven't spoken since then, although he has phoned me without leaving a message. Which could mean anything.

Quite why you find this scenario amusing is very odd. Anyone would think you're deriving some kind of pleasure out of it.....that's not very MSE friendly is it?

In all your excitement you're still missing the facts. I never said he employs staff..I said he has work ASSOCIATES. Do you know the difference?

Furthermore, it is indeed true that he has this business, but owning a small business and property isn't liquid assets. I own a large property worth a fair sum of money, but for all you know I could have an overdraft. I do have one actually, although I don't use it as I'm fortunate enough to have liquid cash too, but if you think everyone who has an expensive property etc automatically has access to cash you're very wrong.

So, for all your assumptions that he must be rolling in cash because he has his own business and property is very naive of you.

But, you know, I'm not really interested in his reasons or mental state (you seem more interested in his - and my - mental state than I am!)

Are you always fascinated by strangers? And is there a name for that condition?

daytona0

Fraise wrote: »

No idea, and nor do I care..l just want my money back. Friends have asked me what i would do if he turned up with it and then tried to rekindle things, but NO WAY would I entertain him again. You only get ONE chance with me.....

I'm going to blow your mind here but...

- People on this forum are generally trying to help you in some way, even by offering you advice above the legal spiel. If you wanted to keep it legal then you shouldnt include the backstory because the backstory generates concerns.

- Your ex has up to now robbed 1400 from you.

We aren't the villains here. There is only one villain here, and it is your ex.

Why you'd have a pop at anyone on this forum is frankly beyond me, because most people on here have so much more integrity. I believe the phrase "love is blind" holds true here!

The mere fact that you have continued to post instead of following through on your letter before action paints a possible picture of your personality. This whole thing seems to rumble on, and you have put in a lot of energy into this thread when a simple solution exists! You have also indicated that you may be in contact with him still (to no avail) despite the LBA, so what the hell is that all about? Either he pays or her doesn't pay and you take him to court. Sod your friends, and sod him! Just sort it out for YOU!

P.S. you MAY benefit from counselling, but I am not going to be bold and say that you DO NEED it. Only you can figure out if you need it, and there is some evidence to suggest that it may help. I, or nobody else, will not lose sleep if you decline it!

dealer_wins

I understand you are angry, I would be. But chasing this loser will in all likelihood result in more upset and costs, and will have almost zero chance of recovering the money.

[Deleted User]

Fraise wrote: »

No, we haven't spoken since then, although he has phoned me without leaving a message. Which could mean anything.

This is looking good.
Exact same happened to me when I considered a moneyclaimonline
Within a week I received payment and didn't have to follow through with it
Good luck - keep your annoyance till you get sorted
xx

chucknorris

Deleted%20User wrote: »

This is looking good.
Exact same happened to me when I considered a moneyclaimonline
Within a week I received payment and didn't have to follow through with it
Good luck - keep your annoyance till you get sorted
xx

After my first (successful) experience with the small claims court, I had a second briefer one too. My wife and I bought a house and the vendor didn't move a significant amount of junk from the back garden. The removal of this was well documented because he refused our first offer, but when we increased the offer, we also sought confirmation that the rubbish would be removed from the garden. He didn't move it, we wrote to him, but got no answer, we went to his house, but his wife said that he wouldn't come to the front door and talk to me. We wrote to him again and said that if he didn't contact us within 14 days we would instigate court proceedings, and that this would increase the costs (I think from about £450 to around £485). He also ignored that letter, but when the court contacted him, he immediately sent us a cheque.

Enterprise_1701C

I noticed earlier that you said you had his bank details (to pay for flights). Are you absolutely sure this was HIS bank account?

If this is the case, could you ask a solicitor about the legalities of simply repaying yourself with these details?

moneyistooshorttomention

Enterprise_1701C wrote: »

I noticed earlier that you said you had his bank details (to pay for flights). Are you absolutely sure this was HIS bank account?

If this is the case, could you ask a solicitor about the legalities of simply repaying yourself with these details?

Whew.

I was surprised to read that comment - but I don't think that would be the way to proceed. It would lay OP open to criminal charges and NOT a good idea.

SnooksNJ

dacouch wrote: »

I'm guessing he either met someone else and / or was annoyed at you not loaning him the money.

Neither are acceptable reasons for his actions but I know a few guys like him and that's how they roll

Exactly. My guess is if the OP didn't ask for the money back he would still be his charming self. Soon to be followed up by another boo hoo story can you lend me money. And another, and another.
Lucky escape if you ask me.

robatwork

daytona0 wrote: »

P.S. you MAY benefit from counselling, but I am not going to be bold and say that you DO NEED it. Only you can figure out if you need it, and there is some evidence to suggest that it may help. I, or nobody else, will not lose sleep if you decline it!

This forum posting saga IS her therapy. And we are a community counsellor. Some people like to share minutiae... it's cathartic.

I guess.