Starting Again at Zero

Flyonthewall

pinpin, possibly, but just because someone got somewhere with lies doesn't make it right.

It confuses me why so many people seem ok with lying, especially when there's no need to. Plus I bet if you are lied to about something you don't like lying then!

Then again, I suppose these forums would be really boring and have very few posts if people rarely lied.

ACG

There is a need to lie. Unfortunately the world we live in means potential employees can be biased. Not all of them but a decent proportion. Legally they can not, but just like bouncers on a night out who do not want groups of lads in they will find other reasons.

Would you want to work for those employers? Those employers could be people that are trying to do the best fo rthe company and other employees (smaller companies feel it a lot more than larger companies as there are less people to share the work between if someone is off).

In an ideal world, no you should not have to lie. In the real world people do need to lie.

Your example about charity work is a mute point, they are getting a free employee. The risk of having someone on the sick with wages to pay is not there.

Flyonthewall

ACG wrote: »

There is a need to lie. Unfortunately the world we live in means potential employees can be biased. Not all of them but a decent proportion. Legally they can not, but just like bouncers on a night out who do not want groups of lads in they will find other reasons.

Would you want to work for those employers? Those employers could be people that are trying to do the best fo rthe company and other employees (smaller companies feel it a lot more than larger companies as there are less people to share the work between if someone is off).

In an ideal world, no you should not have to lie. In the real world people do need to lie.

People feel the need to lie because of the world we've created. There are so many situations where people think they need to lie when in fact they don't and some where saying nothing at all would have been best.

I've had some bad situations with people in a trusted position who have needlessly chosen to lie to me. Personally, I value honesty and chose to be honest.

Regardless of all other situations, I still believe the OP should be honest for all the reasons I've previously stated. Brief, but truthful.

Your example about charity work is a mute point, they are getting a free employee. The risk of having someone on the sick with wages to pay is not there.

No, it's not. They still have to trust the volunteer. There are many volunteers trusted with important information and many who work with vulnerable people. They want honest, trustworthy volunteers. Free or not, if they found out you'd been lying they'd get rid of you.

ACG

The OP being honest is not going to change the world. All it will do is make it harder for them to get a job.

Charity work is not the same as normal work, the risk for the company is not the same. Totally agree if you are doing charity work be honest.

Lets put it another way - if they are honest, they are more likely to come across someone who will discriminate and not give them the job than someone who will appreciate their honesty and give them a job.

Flyonthewall

ACG wrote: »

The OP being honest is not going to change the world. All it will do is make it harder for them to get a job.

Course not, but it could make all the difference to their own life. You don't know that. Getting a job right now isn't easy and there could be any number of reasons for someone not getting a job. However, the OP honesty over another persons clear lack of ability or obvious lie or whatever, could just land them a job.

Plus lying could make it harder for them to get the job if they forget specific details or something doesn't add up and the employer knows they're lying. They'll wonder what they're hiding and assume it's really bad.

Then if they get the job there's the fear of the lie coming out.

You know one of the worst things about anxiety? Overthinking. Overthinking every little thing. When you're trying to get over that doing something that could cause extreme anxiety isn't the smartest option. Worst still when you then add depression to the mix. Especially when you consider the one place they're worrying about is the one they're going to and the one that doesn't know about the issues because they lied.

Actually telling the lie is only one very small part of it all.

Charity work is not the same as normal work, the risk for the company is not the same. Totally agree if you are doing charity work be honest.

I disagree. Some companies rely on a lot of volunteers doing all kinds of jobs. In any company a volunteer could be in any position. There can still be massive risks. A person off sick means no one to do an important job, for a start. Not to mention a possbile risk of their reputation or financial risk (in ways other than wages), depending on the lie.

Not every company with volunteers is a charity and volunteer doesn't mean unimportant.

Lets put it another way - if they are honest, they are more likely to come across someone who will discriminate and not give them the job than someone who will appreciate their honesty and give them a job.

You don't know that. There are numerous equal opportunity employers.

Besides, aside from honesty, if you come across as positive that's another good thing employers want. A positive attitude goes a long way.

If you can also turn negative things to positive that shows the employer what you can do for them then even better. For example, not finishing the piece of work your doing before leaving for the day makes you feel a little bit anxious so you'll always put in that little bit extra time to make sure all work is done and done correctly.

Sure, there's a better way to word that, but hopefully you get my point. Employers want work done and showing you're willing to stay behind to be sure it's done is a good thing, regardless of reason, and better than someone who doesn't care and will run out the door the second the clock ticks to finishing time.

In fact, a common interview question is about strengths and weaknesses. You always get told that you should make your weakness look like a positive.

You don't have to lie, sometimes you just have to think a little about what you're saying and how you're saying it. "Honesty is the best policy" is a saying for a reason.

ACG

We can go on, I think we live on different planets.

Flyonthewall

ACG wrote: »

We can go on, I think we live on different planets.

Yeah. I know people lie, but can't believe I'm having to defend being honest Still, at least personally I'm happier knowing I'm being honest.

So all I'm going to say is, next time you go to lie just think for a moment about telling the truth. Think about what you're saying and how you're saying it. You might just realise you don't need to lie as much as you think and feel better for being able to tell the truth.

devilivus

If you've been sacked from a job for gross missconduct, then it's best to lie and just erase the job from your history as if it never existed. Replace the gap with almost anything!
(I used to say 'travelling' as a younger man when I was job hunting)

Being honest is a noble sentiment, but it won't put food on the table if you have a bad past. You'll be the homeless guy with principles!

nyc_451

Flyonthewall must be surrounded by very nice people at work

I think OP doesn't have a lot of real life experience, so he will learn as he goes. Once he starts working and meets more people, he will decide for himself how he wants to lead his life. It's easy to talk online.

Flyonthewall

blue_mango wrote: »

Flyonthewall must be surrounded by very nice people at work

Yeah, they're all honest, nice people. Actually, same goes for the place I worked for before. Which only goes to prove people don't have to lie so much.

I think OP doesn't have a lot of real life experience, so he will learn as he goes. Once he starts working and meets more people, he will decide for himself how he wants to lead his life. It's easy to talk online.

Indeed.