Intimidated by new partner's wealth/expectations

elsien

I have to ask, but if you've only been on a few dates and find it hard to talk about what he sees in you, how come you've got as far as the bedroom department?
Maybe you both need to back off a bit and get to know each other a bit better.

System

Get out while you can! All of his rich tof friends will see you as a gold digger. You will see what they are like when you meet them. I went with a rich girl and her friends were proper !!!!s to me just because i wasn't wealthy.

geminilady

You really need to talk honestly to this guy if you cannot do that the relationship will not survive.Next time he wants to change the place you have picked tell him it does not have to be expensive to be a nice place and you feel hurt that he thinks your choice not good enough.As for the bedroom if you can have intercourse with him you should be able to talk to him and explain most women need more stimulation than straight sex to orgasm and it is not unusual but normal.As to you not been good enough of course you are he would not be dating you if he did not think that and you can be a lovely person without having a nice house and lots of money.

pinkshoes

Time is something that money cannot buy...

So organise a date,and spent TIME and not money on it e.g. Organise a picnic with a treasure hunt or something. If he doesnt appreciate someone spending time on him, then he is not the man for you!

determined_new_ms

Honestly I hear alarm bells, why would any guy care how you orgasm surely it's just important you do. I think this is uncaring and would really upset me. The money stuff isn't so much of an issue but this is

bagpussbear

poorlittlefish wrote: »

For a couple of our dates I've suggested what, to me, are 'normal' places to go for a meal, but what's happened is that I've met him there and he's just driven us onto somewhere more expensive, which makes me feel that places or things I like aren't good enough.

I think you need to be a little more assertive in this relationship. I would be quite offended if I suggested a restaurant and then he just drove off to what he thought was better. He might be trying to impress you, but it is coming across as domineering.

You're having a sexual relationship after only a few dates - ok that's your choice as a consenting adult, but it sounds that both in the bedroom as well as out he is controlling everything about this relationship, and it's triggering some self esteem issues.

I suggest you step back a little, give yourself some space and maybe reassess things a bit.

lostinrates

elsien wrote: »

I have to ask, but if you've only been on a few dates and find it hard to talk about what he sees in you, how come you've got as far as the bedroom department?
Maybe you both need to back off a bit and get to know each other a bit better.

Or if you have only gone on a few dates how did the subject of exact multiple of salary become clear?

There is no need for financial inequality to be an impediment what so ever, however, if you are not suited in other ways, it doesn't need to grease it artificially either.

poorlittlefish

lostinrates wrote: »

Or if you have only gone on a few dates how did the subject of exact multiple of salary become clear?

I can't remember exactly, but I think he was telling me about how he owns a number of properties that he paid cash for and I didn't understand how that was even possible. I certainly didn't just come right out and ask him!

Reading all these replies has literally lifted a load from my mind so I'm going to have a talk with him tomorrow. I'd already joked "It's not all about you" but as it's having an adverse effect on me I need to let him know - thanks to everyone.

gt568

Hang on, hang on, hang on......

Since when can women orgasm?:eek:

Dr._Shoe

My ex was a demanding control freak who tried to make me feel as if I couldn't run my own life. Makes me wonder how I'd managed for 40 odd years before meeting him and I wonder how I manage now! LOL