Getting kids to be more mindful around the house

FBaby

Ha but at that age they were little angel robots! What I said was what was done often with a big smile because praise was enough of a reward! Then something happened and they regressed, something to do with being more interested in pleasing their friends than mummy! Still at the stage when nagging works for a little while though crossing fingers that the stage by which even that won't work will be short before the stage of accepting their own responsibility will kick in!

Kaye1

My eldest is quite messy. I tried this. I took one clean pair of knickers and one clean pair of socks and hid them.


I tidy her room but I do expect her to bring out her glass and throw her dirty clothes in the basket each day.


She kept forgetting and I stopped reminding. Suddenly, on a school day there was no socks or knickers left. Massive panic on her behalf. I explained that as she hadn't put them in the basket, I didn't wash them, so she no clean clothes left.


Massive realisation that the clothes don't just appear. After about 5 minutes of 'what am I going to do with no knickers?' I produced the last clean pair. She came home from school and saw all the washed knickers/socks on the line.


As time goes on, the amount I expect is slowly increasing. Now she also has to straighten her bed, glass out and washing picked up. It literally takes her 5 minutes a day.


No problem since.

skea56

I really wish my MIL had taken more responsibility when it comes to making her children clean up. She was a SAHM and did everything for them, and still does. He has lived on his own now for 4/5 years and still brings his clothes home to her for washing every other day.
He takes notions where he will go all OCD and clean the house from top to bottom and then want a medal for doing so. And yet, he will reward himself with a cuppa, but leave the cup in the sink instead of the dishwasher 2 feet away - drives me insane!
I spent this morning tidying before work and found 3 cups, a plate, 5 pairs of shoes(!) and his t-shirt he took off to mow the lawn, all in the living room.
And the best of it is, I would put up with all this if he sorted all the gross things like rinsing down the shower after use, hair in the plug hole, wiping down the sink after shaving, cleaning the toilet, just so I don't have to boak every time I have to do it.
I blame MIL's every where

sk56

TBagpuss

surely you should also blame the FIL?

Spendless

Newly_retired wrote: »

The rot has already set in if they are not flushing the toilet at this age.

Don't buy anything with wrappers.
Don't provide tissues.
Insist , as they do at school, on clearing away one activity before getting another one out.
Use school routines as a "given".
I am blessed with a seven year old grandson who does all this without being asked, hates mess in the house, but he was taught from the outset to tidy up and it is second nature.

Do his parents say the same? At not much older I remember drying the pots at my Grandmother's house but I never did it at home. Even as an adult I can't explain why-lol.

j.e.j.

Newly_retired wrote: »

The rot has already set in if they are not flushing the toilet at this age.

I agree re. the toilet flushing.

General untidiness is one thing, but not being toilet trained at the ages of 9 and 12 is something else :eek:

Primrose

As a child my mother gave my brother two warnings abiut tidying up his room, with a deadline, otherwise he was told his things be thrown out in the garden. . Imagine his surprise when he csme home fem school one day and found all his things thrown out into the font garden. To make things worse, it was raining.

My mother refused to enter to enter into discussion about it; just told him that as a teenager this is what taking responsibility was all about and it was time he started lesrning how to be an adult if he wanted to be treated like one. He always took her threats seriously after that.

missbiggles1

notanewuser wrote: »

She's 4 and a half (going on 13).

ETA - I meant that I'm pathologically untidy myself.

So am I, but I do flush the loo after using it!

Newly_retired

Spendless wrote: »

Do his parents say the same? At not much older I remember drying the pots at my Grandmother's house but I never did it at home. Even as an adult I can't explain why-lol.

Yes, they do. His nature is to be tidy.
However his older sister is messy.

Loz01

Sorry but I think if they can't remember to flush a toilet aged 12 and 9 then they need to sharpen up a bit! You should limit the internet/tv or whatever they enjoy doing until you seen an improvement - it isn't a lot to ask to put empty wrappers in a bin or drop dirty clothes into a laundry bin, especially at that age.