Getting kids to be more mindful around the house

suejb2

With the 'things' being left where they are, do what my dad did to me once, put the offending items in my bed! Never did it again.

Do you remember the advert in which the mum had a tantrum in the supermarket because her little one was playing up? Treat fire with fire and play them at their own game leave your stuff out.Hopefully they with realise what you are up to before your house resembles Stig of the dump.

Alikay

onlyroz wrote: »

If you find the answer let me know. I'm fed up of finding nasty surprises in the toilet bowl, toothpaste spit trails down the sink and a trail of empty wrappers around the house.

Getting them to leave the TV/Lego/XBox and come upstairs to flush the loo (both kids to come up together if the culprit is unknown!), clean up the toothpaste or pick up the wrappers: Doing it yourself and complaining won't work. You really need to make having to go back and do it after forgetting more inconvenient than having done it at the time IYKWIM.

With older kids you can extend the chore to make forgetting to flush/pick up dirty laundry etc very inconvenient for them , for example "and while you're cleaning the toothpaste off the floor, you can give the sink a quick wipe-over too".

notanewuser

missbiggles1 wrote: »

Obviously the word "mindful" is being used in a way I've not considered before, which is probably my fault.

I've been talking about doing something automatically, without being reminded all the time, so how is it different?

(Genuine question.)

An automatic process can't be mindful. Mindful implies thinking about it.

peachyprice

OP, if they can't be bothered to put the wrappers and tissues in the bin don't buy them the treats or tissues, they'll soon realise the consequence of their inactions when the cupboard is bare and they have snot dripping down their faces.

missbiggles1

notanewuser wrote: »

An automatic process can't be mindful. Mindful implies thinking about it.

The two aren't mutually exclusive.

notanewuser

missbiggles1 wrote: »

The two aren't mutually exclusive.

No, but they are different processes. Eg clapping at the end of a performance. Some do it because they've been taught (conditioned) that that's what you do while others do it because they really enjoyed the performance and want to show their appreciation. One is automatic and the other is more mindful. It's the difference between doing something because someone else says you should and wanting to do it because it benefits someone else.

amistupid

I was lucky I had a truncheon.

missbiggles1

notanewuser wrote: »

No, but they are different processes. Eg clapping at the end of a performance. Some do it because they've been taught (conditioned) that that's what you do while others do it because they really enjoyed the performance and want to show their appreciation. One is automatic and the other is more mindful. It's the difference between doing something because someone else says you should and wanting to do it because it benefits someone else.

I was thinking of driving.

Mojisola

spendingmad wrote: »

I am fed up with nagging the kids to tidy up after themselves, put wrappers in the bin, flush toilet, put dirty plates in dishwasher etc etc etc. silly little things that I shouldn't have to ask/tell them to do.

You want them to do things without being reminded and they chose not to.

What do you do for them that you can chose not to do?

warehouse

This is a bit of a coincidence but at the weekend I read the story about Paul Baker whos 14 daughter Liberty was killed by a driver high on drugs. The Police wanted to prosecute Paul for daring to stare at the killers family.

At the end of the story Paul says that all he wants in life is to see his Daughter back and that he absolutely misses the mess that she left everywhere. After reading that it brought it home to me pretty clearly that my own 13yo daughter is exactly the same mess wise, and from now on I'm not going to nag her constantly about it but enjoy the fact that she's around to make it.

Perspective OP.