Dating someone who has less than you

Happier_Me

When I met my now husband 20 years ago at the age of 20, deciding on a partner based on material wealth was not a consideration for me. We had little by way of savings or assets between us at the time.

But would I have dated a man without a job and, most importantly, no real intention of getting one, when I was 20? The answer is no, I wouldn't. I was hard working and determined to at least earn a decent wage myself and I wanted someone with similar views to share my life with.

20 years and two children later we are still very happy.

If, for whatever reason, this relationship was to end, would I date someone with less material assets/income than me ... Absolutely!.

Would I marry them...Absolutely not!

Homeownertobe

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

That's debatable. A friend I went to college with (art course) went to Uni afterwards and got a degree in fine art. I decided not to go to Uni but to go straight into work. I was a retail worker for about 15 years. For the last 5-6 years, the friend from college joined our company....his degree got him a long way didn't it?

You have one example. Just one.

There are countless studies that have all come to the same conclusion - graduates earn more.

Here's one for you to peruse: http://www.cipd.co.uk/pm/peoplemanagement/b/weblog/archive/2014/08/04/graduates-earn-up-to-163-15-000-more-a-year-research-reveals.aspx

VfM4meplse

Homeownertobe wrote: »

You have one example. Just one.

That one example sounds like the sourest of grapes to me...!

Georgiegirl256

VfM4meplse wrote: »

That one example sounds like the sourest of grapes to me...!

Hardly love :rotfl: Uni would have been wasted on me. The course I would have done would have been fine art, and as I didn't want to actually get a job in that field, for me it would have been a waste of time.

My point being, that not all graduates earn more. Not all are lucky enough to actually get a job in their chosen field or indeed actually want to.

My "one example" (I could give you more, but I thought only one was needed (obviously not!) was that a university education only stands you in good stead in the long run if you actually do something with it.

Gloomendoom

meritaten wrote: »

I met lecturers who had never set foot outside education - and their lack of understanding of what 'real life' was like was gobsmaking.

Did you meet any with substantial experience outside education?

meritaten

Gloomendoom wrote: »

Did you meet any with substantial experience outside education?

I am sorry - I don't understand the question? in what context?

VfM4meplse

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

My "one example" (I could give you more, but I thought only one was needed (obviously not!) was that a university education only stands you in good stead in the long run if you actually do something with it.

A response typical of the uneducated. Most graduates do something completely unassociated with their choice of subject, it's the skills gained - such as aptitude for conceptual thinking, assimilative and research ability - that the top employers are looking for.

Apart from which, university education confers so much more than enhanced earning power.

missbiggles1

sofarbehind wrote: »

I'm not interested in a partner's education. The only thing that really matters is drive and determination. Don't lose that messedup, it will continue to serve you well. :T You are right to be proud of your achievements, they mean more than my stupid degrees.

And I couldn't imagine having a long term relationship with someone who wasn't well educated.

I've had a few short term relationships with men who weren't but, when the novelty wears off, you want someone that you can talk to and with whom you can have intelligent wide ranging discussions,rather than someone whose horizons are limited to sport and soaps.

I do know that's something of an exaggeration and rather stereotypical but it's based on my experience and, to me, far more important than how much someone earns or whether they have drive and determination (which, actually, I'd hate).

Georgiegirl256

VfM4meplse wrote: »

A response typical of the uneducated. Most graduates do something completely unassociated with their choice of subject, it's the skills gained - such as aptitude for conceptual thinking, assimilative and research ability - that the top employers are looking for.

Apart from which, university education confers so much more than enhanced earning power.

So because I didn't go to university, I am uneducated?

Considering you are presumably one of the "educated" ones, you are totally missing the point, once again!

VfM4meplse

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

So because I didn't go to university, I am uneducated?

No, your response typified a lack of exposure to higher eduction. You can't see it and insist on making unfounded assumptions.