Dating someone who has less than you

VestanPance

feetflames wrote: »

Interesting.

I have a degree in Philosphy and completed this about 15 years ago. Today I earn very little and rent a room in a shared house. The industry I work in is nothing to do with my education.

All I have to show for my education is debt. To be honest, I went to uni as an escape from an unhappy and abusive home. Back then I had no idea what I wanted to do with it, I just knew I wanted to get out.

Very few people I know work in the industry that they qualified in. That's not to say it's all worthless though as some have got really good jobs. I just went into it as a form of escape.

I have read and heard before that those with degrees end up earning more than those without. But that may be because most people who study in uni are a bit more ambitious and probably knew what they wanted to study/do. Although I have no regrets, I wouldn't recommend anyone to study unless they had an idea of what they wanted to do with it (apart from teach it) as it is very expensive to gain a qualification.

I'd imagine they do well because they did science or engineering degrees, not something like philosophy!

Everyone I know with a science or engineering degree is employed in their field of study, or something very closely related to it.

a1fan

Guest101 wrote: »

Do you have a mortgage? If so, you couldnt do the above anyway.

Yes I have a mortgage.

Thanks, I didn't know that. What if I re-mortgaged? which is what I plan to do when my fixed rate is up anyway.

Guest101

VestanPance wrote: »

I'd imagine they do well because they did science or engineering degrees, not something like philosophy!

Everyone I know with a science or engineering degree is employed in their field of study, or something very closely related to it.

To be fair, there's plenty of well paying field or sectors to enter, if you have a decent degree in philosophy. I suspect the poster still doesnt know which path to take and hence has the problems they described

Guest101

a1fan wrote: »

Yes I have a mortgage.

Thanks, I didn't know that. What if I re-mortgaged? which is what I plan to do when my fixed rate is up anyway.

The lender would require (if you wanted both to be on the deeds) to both be on the mortgage application and a joint income assessment be carried out.

You would also need to decide whether you were joint tenants or tenants in common (either both own 100% of the property (or equity therein) or each own a share of the propety (or equity therein))

a1fan

Guest101 wrote: »

The lender would require (if you wanted both to be on the deeds) to both be on the mortgage application and a joint income assessment be carried out.

You would also need to decide whether you were joint tenants or tenants in common (either both own 100% of the property (or equity therein) or each own a share of the propety (or equity therein))

Thanks.

To be fair though it is a small flat (to small for just me sometimes) so if I were to be partnered with someone I'd rather us get our own bigger place and keep my flat to rent out.

Guest101

a1fan wrote: »

Thanks.

To be fair though it is a small flat (to small for just me sometimes) so if I were to be partnered with someone I'd rather us get our own bigger place and keep my flat to rent out.

Just to explain:

1: your residential mortgage would not allow this. You could get consent to let for upto 12 months (possibly 24 lender dependant) before switching to a Buy to Let (where you would require atleast 70% LTV share)

2: you would be a LL, which comes with many responsibilities. The property would not be 'yours', you would give up the rights in exchange for rent ( many find it difficult with places they used to live)

3: Your leaseholder may prevent this, you should check your lease

4: come back to the housing, renting boards before you do such a thing

- though i understand this is not something you considering now; other posters/readers might be, so info is for them as much as you.

Errata

The perfect solution is a man/woman in one's life, but not in one's house.

Carl31

a1fan wrote: »

Would you do it?

My colleague has her own property in London and has her own car. Apart from mortgage she has no debts. She's not a high earner but to have what she's got, she made a lot of sacrifices (such as not going to uni and working instead, saving hard and living cheaply/simply). She is in her late 20's and is single.

She claims she is single because many guys who are around her age do not own their own home and she's reluctant to risk losing anything.

I remember when my sister divorced, she felt she lost out on a lot of financial assets by sharing everything in the first place. It's now put her off to be with someone who has less.

I dated a guy who earned more than I did but over the course of our relationship (5 years) I contributed more financially as he had other outgoings like child support.

I doubt shes single because of that, more likely because it sounds like she values possessions above people

How would she even know that people dont have anything before dating them?

In answer to your question, yes i would, in fact i did and I am now married to her

a1fan

Guest101 wrote: »

Just to explain:

1: your residential mortgage would not allow this. You could get consent to let for upto 12 months (possibly 24 lender dependant) before switching to a Buy to Let (where you would require atleast 70% LTV share)

2: you would be a LL, which comes with many responsibilities. The property would not be 'yours', you would give up the rights in exchange for rent ( many find it difficult with places they used to live)

3: Your leaseholder may prevent this, you should check your lease

4: come back to the housing, renting boards before you do such a thing

- though i understand this is not something you considering now; other posters/readers might be, so info is for them as much as you.

Thanks, I love how this thread has evolved

barbarawright

Do people really make so many enquiries about potential partner's finances before going out for a drink? No wonder she's single...