Hygiene of friends

fivetide

fairy_lights wrote: »

Why feel sorry for them? A bit of clutter and mess is one thing but a sticky carpet, sofa so covered in pet hair it comes off your clothes and blatant disregard for basic hygiene in the kitchen is on another level.
If they were looking forward to having guests they should have made the effort to clean up a bit.

As I said, they might not realise there is an issue. The wanting to invite people round and be friendly (making food etc) is separate to the cleanliness issue. I can feel sorry for them and the way they live. It is called compassion. You might want to try it.


Example, my dad is a plumber. He used to do council contracts, servicing fires etc. He went round to one elderly lady's house once and she was delighted to have a guest and show off her 'new wallpaper' because 'she didn't get many visitors'.


The wallpaper was actually baked bean tin labels stuck to the wall. Do I think that is right? Of course not. Did it look a right mess? Apparently so. But do I feel sorry for her in that situation? Damn straight I do.


Besides, the OP can simply go and visit Yvonne next and have a shower there

Mojisola

fivetide wrote: »

The wallpaper was actually baked bean tin labels stuck to the wall.

Sounds like a Turner prize entry.

fierystormcloud

Urgh Gross! This is why I am glad I make a point of not going to people's houses very often, and rarely have people at mine. It's amazing how people have different standards of cleanliness. I don't know what to suggest actually, other than you just keep putting them off. We have done this a few times, and most of the time they just stop asking.

(nb: this excludes family and close friends.)

Gra76

Fortunately I've not got any friends who are like this but as part of my working day I spend a lot of time in peoples houses looking at insurance claims to peoples properties.

I'd say 99.9% of the houses are lovely and a pleasure to be in.

Of the 0.1% that aren't I can say I remember the worst ones vividly from the 15 years I've been doing it.

There was the woman with cat excrement all over the house and trodden into carpets. It was on worktops and unbelievably on top of the wall units. You couldn't breath for the stench of stale cat pee. I've got an iron constitution but even I was gagging. I left after a couple of minutes and refused to go back till the house had been cleaned and aired out.

Then there was the chap who had multiple dogs, all of which must have been infested with fleas, as were the carpets and pretty much everything else in the house I think. I ended up with dozens of bites on my legs and no-one would go back till he'd had it sorted out. How he lived in there I'll never know.

There's loads more but if I list them all as they come into my head I'll be here for hours...

fairy_lights

fivetide wrote: »

As I said, they might not realise there is an issue. The wanting to invite people round and be friendly (making food etc) is separate to the cleanliness issue. I can feel sorry for them and the way they live. It is called compassion. You might want to try it.

Seriously? Nice of you to assume I have no compassion because I don't feel sorry for everyone with a dirty house.
The story of the Old Lady with the bean can labels on the wall is a very sad one, but the OP has said nothing to suggest their friends are vulnerable and need sympathy. Some people just have dirty houses.

PlutoinCapricorn

I am not a particularly compassionate person myself, but I see it as caring enough to have a word with them.

mumps

I used to have neighbours whose house was like that. The smell was awful. They were nice but you wouldn't want to spend any time there. She had an excellent reputation for her cakes. She would make them for cake sales at school, get asked to make special ones for celebrations etc. If only people had known the conditions they were made in. I never had one of her cakes and it put me off buying cakes at fetes as I always wondered what the kitchen was like where they were baked.

System

Gavin83 wrote: »

What meat was it?

I do kind of read that as they like their meat rare and you like it well done. When you say 'raw' are you exaggerating?

Sausages, chicken, burgers.

No I wasn't exaggerating. The sausages were still cold inside and very pale. The burgers, well I know you can eat beef 'rare' but I'd still rather not.

The chicken was cooked enough just to seal the outside but still uncooked inside. Yes I did test them, I sunk my teeth into them and found out.

David301

No they aren't in any kind of hardship, and curiously enough they do bake cakes lol

vroombroom

This post had me reeling. I was diagnosed with OCD a few years ago and sometimes it can become quite severe.

I also work as a self employed cleaner so some of the houses I have seen recently make me do this :eek::eek::eek: Silently of course. There was a woman who smoked inside the house and I came out reeking - I had to have two showers to get rid of the smell.

I also clean a small building site (offices, canteen etc) and often witness the builders going for a pee and then not washing their hands :eek: