Here we can all be heard for a little while

whitewing

I haven't read everyone's posts yet, but I had to link this in. If you are feeling fragile, do not read it. It is about a woman who buys puppies and then gives them away when they are too much trouble.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3213491/I-rid-dogs-soon-stop-cute-puppies-woman-s-given-away-FOUR-dogs-four-years-brazen-confession-ll-enrage-pet-lovers.html

I have serious concerns about the effect on the dog's mental health, but also that the Daily Mail itself can put "being controversial" over the wellbeing of the journalist's family as I don't doubt that this article will have a big impact on the journalist's children.

Would there be any mileage in a formal complaint to the RSPCA do you reckon? Could she be banned from owning dogs?

Also, what do you think would be the best way to complain to the Mail?

(I am happy to use my own childhood experiences of neglect to express my concerns).

Note, I am not against a dog being rehomed, but to continually buy puppies and get rid of them...

Birdie85

Change is always scary Melly, but I think you should move on to pastures new!

codemonkey

Ww, I don't say this about many people but she is a disgusting human being and I hope her children grow up to treat her the way she treats those poor dogs. Rescues are packed with unwanted dogs not to mention (penguin -do not read WaS or anyone sensitive about animal cruelty all the dogs in pounds that are killed after 7 days and all the dog fighting rings who get bait dogs from the free ads - Was you may read again.)

That being said, I think she's trying to be Katie Hopkins by trolling and being contraversial for the sake of it. Best not to give her any publicity really.

Mells - change is terrifying but it does sound like the new job is the better fit. But nobody would blame you if you decided to stay put with everything else that's going on.

whitewing

Just went back to read some of the thread, but didn't get very far as I wanted to ask this before I forget (so you may have already been asked, WaS).

Why didn't social services remove you when you were born, and put you in care as a baby?

Waves_and_Smiles

I think that you should go for it, Melly. You can still stay in contact with the nice people and might meet even more nice people! A challenge is always good as long as you can handle it and it does really sound like you can. Also, the potential company sounds very good indeed.

Whitewing, there simply wasn't the help available back then from what I have gathered. I was put specifically into my dad's care and his mum was alive then too and seen as a stable influence. Unfortunately she died when I was two by which time all outside support had been stopped. My cuddly bulldozer of a social worker has questioned it, too and believes that I shouldn't have been placed with my parents at all but from talking to my dad it seems that they weren't offered an alternative. My aunt asked my dad if she could adopt me or at least have me live with her when I was five because she could see how bad the situation was but my dad refused. She told me that I became very much my dad's focus after I was born and he clung onto me as the one bit of something good in his life, he didn't want to let me go.

Sadly, the last time I saw my aunt was when I was 16 after my mother hadn't contacted her for 3 years and she told me that it was too difficult to stay in contact with me due to her own feelings of guilt. Within minutes of me arriving she apologised and said she should have tried harder to remove me from the situation and that she was always aware of how bad it was but her own mental health prevented her from acting. I never blamed her at all, I adored her while growing up. But she didn't feel strong enough to cope with her feelings and was honest enough to admit that staying in touch with me would be a constant reminder to her of how she felt that she had failed. It was very sad.

mellymoo74

Thanks Code

[FONT=&quot]Dear Mrs xxxx [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot] [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Thank you for your email and letting me know that the police attended last night until 7pm. I am saddened to hear that the situation has deteriorated for you. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot] [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Our response in difficult circumstances such as this is always to await contact from the police so as not to prejudice any due process the police may be following. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot] [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]So I am regrettably unable to let you know what we doing as we are not aware of what the situation is. I can only imagine the distress that you may be experiencing currently and would like to offer support to you. This could be directly from our support services, Victim Support via any criminal proceedings the police may decide is warranted or a referral from us to the BRAVE project which specifically supports people in your situation through any due process in which you may become involved. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot] [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Please let me know if you would like me to make a referral or you would like to access any service that we may not be aware of. I am more than happy to visit you at a mutually convenient time if this is something you require. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot] [/FONT]

mellymoo74

WaS one of the hardest lessons is that parents are fallible

not normally a wuss, just had too much on I think

whitewing

melly,

A referral to the BRAVE project has got to be worth a go, hasn't it?

(I don't like Victim Support, as I can't stand the word 'Victim').

Waves_and_Smiles

A referral sounds good, Melly, I agree that it's worth a try. The more support the better.

I don't like the word victim either, whitewing. I am a little odd with words, I never refer to myself as a victim (I don't consider myself one), never say that I am 'suffering with' (I believe I have a choice to not to suffer with anything if I choose not to view it that way) and I never use the term 'survivor' (I don't view myself as defined by anything negative that I have been through). They are all personal preferences, I have no objections if anyone else uses the terms to refer to themselves or others, I just don't like using them with myself.

mellymoo74

too much intrusion currently OH no cope well with it and hes already screwed up because of yesterday (felt vulnerable, couldnt protect himself, worries about protecting me)
plus the issue wouldnt have existed but for the stupid housing association