one day at a time

710 Posts
I am a 48 year old mother of one DS, I have a mortgage of 100,000 on my little bungalow and a few other debts CC etc of approx 5,000 or less..................
We have a wonderful DS. We have a quite successful business (for now anyway)………
My OH is a functioning alcoholic, (there I said it), too look at him you would never know, and probably never believe it. When sober there isn't a better man walking, he is a hard worker, kind, considerate and a fantastic father. When he drinks, which is most evenings he can be all of the opposite. Don't get me wrong we do sometimes still have good days, especially when OH is on the wagon, but many more bad than good....
I have been trying now for years to help my OH with his problem, his health has suffered but he refuses to stop. Xmas 2015 gave me the strength to take a massive step backwards, I am exhausted with it him mentally and physically, not to mention the affect this was having on my DS.
OH can only help himself, it is not my duty and it has taken me a long time for me to accept this, but I finally have................I am now putting myself and my rock my DS first.
Future protection in mind, I have been saving without his knowledge now for roughly 10 years scrimping with the intention of paying off our mortgage "My life the last 10 years have given me a terrible fear of being homeless to the point of constant nightmares".....To my amazement I have managed to secretly save £63,550 to date....(69,140 updated 19th November 2016)
These are my reasons for wanting to pay my mortgage off as quickly as possible, I have no idea how long my OH will manage to carryon working or how much longer before our little business will crumble or how long the relationship will take the strain, I just know by focusing on saving for our future and my little house I get back a sense of control which helps get me through each week.
I also have a diary to help keep me in check when tempted to spend and a place to throw out my emotions when I feel like I am falling backwards…………………
DS 270…. CC 3,950 …. Mortgage £100,000 /£63,550/72,420 paid £36,450/27,580 remaining….Xmas Hols £0
We have a wonderful DS. We have a quite successful business (for now anyway)………
My OH is a functioning alcoholic, (there I said it), too look at him you would never know, and probably never believe it. When sober there isn't a better man walking, he is a hard worker, kind, considerate and a fantastic father. When he drinks, which is most evenings he can be all of the opposite. Don't get me wrong we do sometimes still have good days, especially when OH is on the wagon, but many more bad than good....
I have been trying now for years to help my OH with his problem, his health has suffered but he refuses to stop. Xmas 2015 gave me the strength to take a massive step backwards, I am exhausted with it him mentally and physically, not to mention the affect this was having on my DS.
OH can only help himself, it is not my duty and it has taken me a long time for me to accept this, but I finally have................I am now putting myself and my rock my DS first.
Future protection in mind, I have been saving without his knowledge now for roughly 10 years scrimping with the intention of paying off our mortgage "My life the last 10 years have given me a terrible fear of being homeless to the point of constant nightmares".....To my amazement I have managed to secretly save £63,550 to date....(69,140 updated 19th November 2016)
These are my reasons for wanting to pay my mortgage off as quickly as possible, I have no idea how long my OH will manage to carryon working or how much longer before our little business will crumble or how long the relationship will take the strain, I just know by focusing on saving for our future and my little house I get back a sense of control which helps get me through each week.
I also have a diary to help keep me in check when tempted to spend and a place to throw out my emotions when I feel like I am falling backwards…………………
DS 270…. CC 3,950 …. Mortgage £100,000 /£63,550/72,420 paid £36,450/27,580 remaining….Xmas Hols £0
0
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clean bathroom DONE
hoover through DONE
Clean kitchen DONE
mop through DONE
polish DONE
Cook dinner. DONE
Cook tea. DONE
ironing loads DONE
Post teabay jacket DONE
list for teabay items
walk dog DONE
Empty green bin and bag up leaves from last year yuck not nice but DONE
Wash dog after she rolls in gungy leaves from last year again not nice but DONE
nice hour nap on my way
CC 5,980 mortgage £29,570
CC 5,980 mortgage £29,570
Congrats on the win!:beer:
Just popped in to say hi your not alone
Well done for starting the diary :T
🌟
My to do list today:
Went shops, cheap essentials only before big shop DONE
Hoover through DONE
Mop DONE
Polish DONE
Cook tea DONE
Phone yellow DONE
Cleaned ds room and bathroom yikes and he thought was clean DONE
Change bedding DONE
Walk doggy moo / started to rain
Goodnight diary, goodnight everyone happy saving ……..
CC 5,980 5,960 mortgage £29,570
£2 a day challenge now up to £24.00.
To Do List:
Hoover through DONE
Washing DONE
Ironing
Do shopping DONE
Casserole for tomorrow DONE
Mow lawn to front DONE
Cut back bushes/ Sweep side path DONE
Mow back garden
Sweep/clean patio DONE
List teabay
CC 5,970 MORTGAGE 27,630
Now on to the downsides, yes I have been very silly and lots of downsides, firstly spent £24.99 on clothes rack for DS as his snapped and he has more clothes than Gok Wan, my ocd was causing me to almost tremble every time I walked into his room, clothes freshly washed and ironed just sprawled all over, nightmare. Second spend, this a necessary purchase as DS has laryngitis and humidifier for his room definitely needed in this weather, soooo another £39.99 ouch.
Friday night £10 down the drain online bingo, then again Saturday night so another £20 wasted. This is my worst regret of the weekend hating myself at the moment. I haven’t used any online gambling sites for almost 2 months so angry and disgusted in myself again……..
Third spend at carboot this morning, bought a lovely bag for £4.50 shouldn’t have, but thinking straight had gone right out of the window by now. I did stick to my £5 spend however and found a lovely top from nexty only 50p.
Also used CC yesterday has now gone up by a further £6.84, why can’t I cut that blooming card up once and for all. My water bill plonked through the door also yesterday with an all mighty thud for £77.82 I had totally forgot about that so backward step again. £96.82 spend this weekend BAD, but helps by writing it down. I am going to have a nice nap then search out some teabay stuff to sell, that might make me feel better. Goodbye Diary see you soon……..
To Do List:
Hoover through DONE
Mop kitchen DONE
Clean bathroom DONE
Washing DONE
Ironing 3 quarters DONE
Mow lawn to back garden DONE
List teabay
CC 5,976.84 MORTGAGE 27,630
To Do List: Not done very well today, sunshine slows me down
Doggy walk DONE
Hoover through DONE
Mop kitchen DONE
Clean bathroom
Washing DONE
Ironing
shopping DONE
List teabay
Cc 5,962.13 mortgage 27,390 my £2 a day now up to £40.00.
Pets always manage to come up with something helpful, don't they?
LBM £29,598 :shocked: (29.05.15) DFD June 2021
29.12.15 - B/card 1 £6813 B/card 2 £3575 Virgin CC £13658 Loan £5842 Next £0 OD £200
20.06.15 - B/card 1 £4139 B/card 2 £4025 Virgin CC £13100 Loan £7303 Next £58 OD £200
Diary http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5256548
I also have a teen with expensive clothes habits that I find hard to say no to
Good luck, I look forward to your progress
Mortgage 1 @ 23/03/2019 [STRIKE]£101297[/STRIKE] £84457 16.6% DI [STRIKE]£6.95[/STRIKE] £6.15
Mortgage 2 @ 12/04/2015 [STRIKE]£136121[/STRIKE] £100,546 26.1
% DI [STRIKE]£9.13[/STRIKE] £6.07
1st LBM 02/06/2013 £[STRIKE]21595[/STRIKE] Debt Free Day 27/03/2015