is my husband hiding money?

mumof4littleguys

Guest101 wrote: »

Have you tried to seduce him?

Not being funny, but there's two equal parties in the relationship. If your love life has gone sour, he may be thinking the worst.

Poor communication is the death of a relationship. But equally lack of intimacy can stifle communication.

As I said before I have tried EVERYTHING to fix that part of our relationship. It has been going in for years and he is not interested in tge slightest.

fierystormcloud

Funny how the posters saying stay put and make it work etc, are men.

I'm off now anyway, as I said OP, ignore dangerous and damaging advice to put up and shut up, and saying just act sexy for him and seduce him. (Can anyone believe someone actually SAID that?!) And get help. PLEASE.

mumof4littleguys

fierystormcloud wrote: »

I have to go now OP, but hopefully you will take heed of the sensible advice that myself and Thorsoak and a few others have given, to try and leave this emotionally abusive and controlling relationship, and not the dangerous information that has been given to stay in your marriage because it's just a bit 'tired.'

Seriously, I have heard it all now.

Thankyou so much for all your advise. I cant believe that people out there who don't even know me will try to help so much. I do appreciate it.

thorsoak

mumof4littleguys wrote: »

Thankyou so much for all your advise. I cant believe that people out there who don't even know me will try to help so much. I do appreciate it.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do. We've given you food for thought at least. Also, leads to tools which you might use at some time in the future.

mumof4littleguys

David301 wrote: »

o did a basic form online with the bits of info you have supplied and you are entitled to about £10,000 worth of help.So that + wages is £1200 to £1300 per month

We applied for housing benefit and council tax benefit but were turned down. Other than ctc I cant think of anything else.

Mojisola

mumof4littleguys wrote: »

Thankyou so much for all your advise. I cant believe that people out there who don't even know me will try to help so much. I do appreciate it.

Doesn't that put your husband's behaviour towards you into perspective?

The person who is closest to you, who should love you more than anyone else in the world, doesn't care enough about you to discuss your joint family finances, let alone any intimacy or other relationship issues!

Is this the relationship you want to stay in for years? Is that what you want your children to think is a healthy marriage?

LannieDuck

OP - apart from childcare, what's preventing you looking for a full time job?

Presumably your OH's view is that he doesn't have to worry about childcare because he works full time and is the breadwinner. So what would his attitude be if you were both working full time?

mumof4littleguys

I have given a lot of thought to leaving. Not just recently but over the years.
But the guilt of taking the children away from their dad kills me.
Plus I literally have no friends, no family... I cant do it.
Im so so so upset right now. I actually think I'd rather die than live this life.

mumof4littleguys

LannieDuck wrote: »

OP - apart from childcare, what's preventing you looking for a full time job?

Presumably your OH's view is that he doesn't have to worry about childcare because he works full time and is the breadwinner. So what would his attitude be if you were both working full time?

He said he will not pay towards childcare atall. I wouldn't be able to afford it on my own. Id be working to pay someone else to look after my kids.

Guest101

fierystormcloud wrote: »

Funny how the posters saying stay put and make it work etc, are men.

I'm off now anyway, as I said OP, ignore dangerous and damaging advice to put up and shut up, and saying just act sexy for him and seduce him. (Can anyone believe someone actually SAID that?!) And get help. PLEASE.

Did i say 'act sexy', or did i say seduce him.

Hmm.

There's two parties in this relationship, he may equally feel the OP isnt attracted to him anymore....

Oh but mere men should not have an opinion....