Standing up for Pregnant lady

geerex

fierystormcloud wrote: »

Oh yes, of course they are, but in EVERYONE ELSE'S WORLD....First class is generally at the front. :rotfl:

I don't believe your story for a fleeting second, that half the train is empty and people are all huddled in one or two carriages. I do believe that the empty carriages were first class though!

Honestly? Do you want schematics? A video perhaps?

You're making a total fool of yourself. Just beacsue thats how trains are configured in your neck of the woods does not mean that's how they are in EVERYONE ELSE'S WORLD.

And yes, this does happen on a daily basis. I suspect that even with a video, you'd still deny the truth. You seem to be the type.

Georgiegirl256

geerex wrote: »

Honestly? Do you want schematics? A video perhaps?

You're making a total fool of yourself. Just beacsue thats how trains are configured in your neck of the woods does not mean that's how they are in EVERYONE ELSE'S WORLD.

And yes, this does happen on a daily basis. I suspect that even with a video, you'd still deny the truth. You seem to be the type.

Yes, you are correct in that first class is not always at the front. The vast majority of the time it is, but now and again it is at the back. DH found that out when he went and stood on the track where he thought first class would stop at, only for it to be at the other end of the train for a change and so had to run down to the other end!

I still think that if someone fit and able sees someone who is clearly struggling that it's only polite to at least offer their seat.

fierystormcloud

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

Yes, you are correct in that first class is not always at the front. The vast majority of the time it is, but now and again it is at the back. DH found that out when he went and stood on the track where he thought first class would stop at, only for it to be at the other end of the train for a change and so had to run down to the other end!

I still think that if someone fit and able sees someone who is clearly struggling that it's only polite to at least offer their seat.

This is why I said 'generally' at the front. As it is sometimes at the opposite end. But the very idea that people would cram into one or two carriages while loads of carriages sit empty at the front is ridiculous. They are obviously first class.

The poster in question is just trying to cover the fact that they are rude and ignorant, and would not give their seat up for someone who needs it.

persa

I would always get up for a woman with a badge or who was heavily heavily pregnant. However, I wouldn't necessarily get up for someone with a smallish bump if no badge - it's the fear of offering a fat person a seat. I've had it done to me before, and even though the gesture was made out of kindness, I felt like crap for a very long time afterwards.

I wouldn't give an older person a seat without being asked unless they looked like they were struggling/tired. You don't want to assume, whereas pregnant women rarely decline a seat.

London is a busy place, I can probably count on one hand the number of times I've waited for another less busy train. People always have to be somewhere fast. Even if there was an empty train behind, I'd still get up for an obviously pregnant lady. It's just instinctive, isn't it?

In my experience though, it's generally us women who give up seats for other women... I guess blokes are so rarely offered a seat, when they grab one, they're reluctant to get up!

System

DKLS wrote: »

I would have given up my seat but you need to be careful differentiating between fat and pregnant, I once offered me seat to a lady I thought was pregnant, she was huffing and puffing and looked flushed and uncomfortable, I offered my seat and she berated me as she was "effing fat not pregnant".

Still doesn't stop me offering my seat, just like I still open doors for the person behind me regardless of gender and I have been berated for that my militant feminist types.

That happened to me yesterday. I was so embarassed i just took the seat Didn't have the heart to explain i'm just fat

lostinrates

Soleil_lune wrote: »

Nobody else even looked at her.

That is the real point. Its unlikely everyone on the carriage needed a seat yet, OP benefits more than normal and a pregnant woman might be expected to. Where is everyone else in this tale?

harrys_nan wrote: »

I would and do, give my seat up for anyone regardless of age, sex or condition that I think needs my seat more than I do and I am an OAP. Not that should make any difference.

Exactly

Flyonthewall wrote: »

Or maybe she knew all that and thought "I can't manage to stand for 5 minutes waiting for the next train" .

The number of times I have felt this


I am a sometimes walking stick user. Last time I went to London I took no stick, of course no one stood for me, but by the end of the day I was rather lame and hobbly. Last time I went I did take a stick and I thought it was rather depressing that only twice was I offered a seat, ( neither time did I need to accept it). Both times were by people very obviously not of 'westernised' culture.

AubreyMac

I've been told many times that London has an 'uncaring' culture but having lived her my entire life, I know no different.

I would happily give up my seat for an elderly or disabled person. With a pregnant woman though, I wouldn't voluntarily offer my seat. If I was asked directly then I would begrudgingly oblige. Pregnancy is (mostly, I hope) a choice and to expect (and feel entitled) others to accomodate that choice is, in my opinion, rather selfish.

Georgiegirl256

AubreyMac wrote: »

I've been told many times that London has an 'uncaring' culture but having lived her my entire lift, I know no different.

I would happily give up my seat for an elderly or disabled person. With a pregnant woman though, I wouldn't voluntarily offer my seat. If I was asked directly then I would begrudgingly oblige. Pregnancy is (mostly, I hope) a choice and to expect (and feel entitled) others to accomodate that choice is, in my opinion, rather selfish.

It is (mostly) a choice, but some people also suffer terribly throughout or at various stages. So, if you saw a pregnant woman who looked like she was suffering and needed a seat, would you not offer?

I genuinely can't get my head around the fact that someone fit, healthy and able to stand, would not give up their seat to a person who was in need of it more than them.

AubreyMac

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

It is (mostly) a choice, but some people also suffer terribly throughout or at various stages. So, if you saw a pregnant woman who looked like she was suffering and needed a seat, would you not offer?

If I was tired and had sore feet then no I wouldn't. If I felt sympathy for her then I would. But as mentioned before, I try to avoid seats where I'm likely to have to get up in the first place.

When there was a tube strike, my friend who had then recently moved to London walked for 3 hours straight. This was due to getting a bit lost and gathering her bearings to get a bus. When she got on the bus it was packed because there was no tubes so she had to stand. Her legs were in agony by then any gave in, causing her to collapse in exhaustion. Although people helped her up, nobody offered her their seat (and she isn't the type to ask directly).

Now I would say in her situation, she was less able to stand comfortably than some pregnant/elderly people but it's just not visible therefore easier to ignore.

What I don't understand is why fit parents with a pram need to sit. Surely if the pram is parked safely in the allocated space, the parent is just as able to stand (by the pram) as any other childless person.

FatVonD

I know where you're coming from, OP.

I used to take a bus from Waterloo station every morning. It was the terminus and in rushe hour there was just one minute between buses and they would come out empty. There would be one queue and anyone that didn't want to stand would step to the left if there were no seats left when they got to the front and start to form the front of the queue for the next bus, people that didn't mind standing would walk past and get on. I would usually wait the extra minute for a seat and invariably a pregnant woman would get on at the last minute instead of waiting a whole minute for the next one and though they may not have expected a seat they certainly never refused. Eventually I just started sitting at the back instead of the front.

Re trains and first class carriages, in London the first and last carriages are never first class on the suburban/commuter trains. First class is always about three carriages from either end.And it's true, people crowd onto the first carriages through the barrier but if you walk further down the train there will be seats. In the mornings the reverse is true, everyone wants to be at the front but if you get on at the back you're more likely to get a seat.