Nice People Thread No. 14, all Nice and Proper

PasturesNew

Spirit - Sorry I wasn't here to say something daft so you know everything's still normal! Glad there was "nothing wrong with you".

Doozergirl

Generali wrote: »

Wuss. I used to ride across the city with my 9 month old strapped to the back!!!



Nice. You come into Waterloo from memory...? That's a pretty pleasant stroll.

What is this talk of folding bikes? Surely you didn't move away before the advent of the 'Boris Bike'? I still haven't been on one. I'm either not wearing appropriate footwear or lugging a cabin bag.

lostinrates

Generali wrote: »

The roads will be absolutely chocka....or everyone will be working from home apart from the [STRIKE]peasants[/STRIKE] hard working ordinary men and women of London that can't afford the congestion charge anyway.

Yes! but at least its mid week.

SingleSue

Doozergirl wrote: »

Hmm. That's probably the worst thing to do.

Imagine it was someone else suffering an anxiety attack. Would you say that to them? Think about what you might say to someone else and remember to treat yourself with that kindness.

No digging deep required, just an acceptance of the feeling, an appreciation that the threat isn't real (although worrying it's a heart attack is a concern) and a talking to yourself in the way that you would talk to someone you loved. No pulling together or digging deep. We talk to ourselves in ways that we'd never dream if taking to others.

Anxiety is horrible. Mindfulness classes would be helpful to help manage those moments and it sounds like some councilling for what triggered that fear.

Not sure if you're allowed beta blockers with your recent conditions? It does make the phyical sensations stop within a numberof minutes. The head stuff triggering it needs sorting. Anxiety is debilitating, you don't need any more of that.

I do the stern talking to myself thing too, it seems to help me, not sure why.

Mind you, I am also one of those who hates people cuddling or hugging me when upset (and I feel awkward when others start blubbing) or will say things designed to make me feel better. I prefer the logical route "Don't be blooming silly, of course the place isn't going to flood, it's the blooming tap dripping!" sort of thing.

Suppose it is one reason why counselling never really worked for me, don't like platitudes, I like facts.

I kicked the CPN out of my house once as she tried the platitude, designed to make me feel better approach "I think you are coping really well", "Well, if I am 'coping really well', you wouldn't be coming to my house!". I didn't want platitudes, I wanted help.

Did I ever tell you I am an awkward begger......:rotfl:

Nikkster

PasturesNew wrote: »

Yes, it's what I intended to do in the longer-term. My sibling did that with hers. I need to make it worth their while and think up more electrical work too, I'm sure I had something else in mind at some point.

Outside light?

PasturesNew

Nikkster wrote: »

Outside light?

Yes, I think I was thinking of a PIR with a switch for: ON, PIR, OFF and maybe a DUSK+4 hours setting (if that exists).

michaels

PasturesNew wrote: »

Yes, I think I was thinking of a PIR with a switch for: ON, PIR, OFF and maybe a DUSK+4 hours setting (if that exists).

Sometimes PIR lights (if you have one already) have that sort of functionality (apart from the on for 4 hours) built in, for example on (not PIR) can be achieved but switching on, off and on again quickly.

ivyleaf

Sending very best wishes to all unwell /anxious NPs

It's lovely to read your care for each other coming across in so many posts.

Edit: What does PIR stand for, please? I suspect I'll have a DUH! moment when someone tells me.

michaels

PIR stands for 'motion sensor light'

lostinrates

I think there are certainly times wherea stern talking to is more in order than other routes, otherwise the risk is the boundaries become too frightening to challenge and the comfort of not becoming less anxious is less stressful than living with the anxiety.

Spirit seems to me possessed of a great deal of emotional wisdom.

I wonder though, if one cannot do a balance of both. 'Get a grip' between times you set aside to investigate and work towards resolve of emotional crisis.