Asking a guy out?

gwen80

I feel about 16 for posting this, but could do with some advice. I'm single, 34 and have recently left a job. There was a bloke there who I think might have had a soft spot for me. Whilst working there I was slightly stupid and rather distracted by another guy who I now realise would not have made me happy. Argh. I don't think I was obvious with the other bloke and certainly nothing happened. Now I've been thinking about things and I think I may have been barking up the wrong tree. The bloke who I think might like me is funny, kind and a really decent bloke. Can I salvage this and how?

raven83

gwen80 wrote: »

I feel about 16 for posting this, but could do with some advice. I'm single, 34 and have recently left a job. There was a bloke there who I think might have had a soft spot for me. Whilst working there I was slightly stupid and rather distracted by another guy who I now realise would not have made me happy. Argh. I don't think I was obvious with the other bloke and certainly nothing happened. Now I've been thinking about things and I think I may have been barking up the wrong tree. The bloke who I think might like me is funny, kind and a really decent bloke. Can I salvage this and how?

I would just send the guy you like a text asking if he fancies catching up over a coffee one day, and then take it from there.

gwen80

I don't have his number...

dandelionclock30

Just send a little note or card to work, addressed to him obviously saying that you enjoyed working with him and for him to keep in touch. Then he can take that how he wants, its a green light if he is interested or if he isn't then you haven't shown yourself up or anything.
Good luck.

NICHOLAS_2

What made you think he had a soft spot for you?

gwen80

NICHOLAS wrote: »

What made you think he had a soft spot for you?

Various things that I think I've been a bit blind to due to distraction of the other guy. He danced with me and two other girls all night at the Christmas party. When I've been a bit glum he's tried to make me laugh and smile. He walks past my desk and I look round and he's looking at me, but looks away.

gwen80

dandelionclock30 wrote: »

Just send a little note or card to work, addressed to him obviously saying that you enjoyed working with him and for him to keep in touch. Then he can take that how he wants, its a green light if he is interested or if he isn't then you haven't shown yourself up or anything.
Good luck.

I'm not sure about this. He'd open it at his desk and then his team would see so on one hand could be embarrassing for both of us. On the other hand, he may just see it as a friendly gesture and not think anymore of it. Of course I don't want to show myself up, but he's quite shy so I think I might have to make the first move. I'm shy too, but I'm thinking I need to bite the bullet and see if he wants to meet up. If he does, great. If he doesn't, then at least I know and I tried. If he doesn't want to meet up, I don't think he's the type to go into work saying anything like 'ooh gwen asked me to meet up - can you believe it??'. I'm sure he'd just politely decline and that would be it.

mrcow

gwen80 wrote: »

I don't have his number...

But you have your old work number? or can you email him?

Life's too short not to.

gwen80

mrcow wrote: »

But you have your old work number? or can you email him?

Life's too short not to.

I wouldn't call or email him at work. I agree life is too short. I'm wondering about possibly adding him on facebook and then sending a message? Thoughts? And what to say/ask?

Wilma33

Add him on Facebook and send a quick message saying hi and see what happens.

fizz

Agree with Wilama33, Facebook has it's plus points and if he's not interested, it won't be a big deal.