Benefits and children leaving home.

gettingready

What about trying to work smarter rather than harder?

Get some qualifications that will allow you to increase your salary and be self sufficient?

Evening classes when your almost grown up daughter can look after the younger one so you could attend and improve your job/pay prospects? Open University?

I was a single parent most of my life, my daughter is all grown up now and away from home but while she was young I did better myself in every way possible.

You do come across bitter about the "woman with the shiny car" and have a dig between the line about her not having UK qualifications implying she is "foreign". So am I - I came to UK 24 years ago with poor English and a year old child and I managed to come on top. Why can't you if you were born/brought up/schooled here?

FBaby

OP I risky feel for you. Raising a child alone whilst working full time is very tough. To do so and yet feel you actually have less control over getting decent accommodation then a single parent on full benefit is hard to cope with.

I know that most landlords don't want people on benefits but I would have thought that was mainly in relation to people not working at all rather then those working full time but still need help. Have you made it clear to the agency that you work and ask them to ask landlords if they would make an exception for you?

As for HB once the kids have left I think you are letting your current situation affect your outlook. You will have a lot more time when it comes to it to look for somewhere smaller or a bit further away. Commuting will be easier without worrying about dropping a child to childcare. You might yourself decide that you want out of where you are and look for another job. And who knows by then you might fall in love again and move in with a partner.

I wish you good luck finding somewhere to live. It must be such a stressful time at the moment trying to juggle everything.

BigAunty

Deleted_User wrote: »

So, what happens when parents rely on HB and other benefits to pay the rent and bills, then their child(ren) leave home and they are no longer entitled to the same amounts?

Yours is a common query - this forum gets swamped by the same question at school/college leaving time each year. At least you are considering it a decade in advance!

The answer is that it is a family, not a state matter. It is up to the parents and their now non-dependants to make changes to plug the shortfall. They are usually advised by forum members to BUDGET for this, for example, by decreasing their household expenses or making changes to their family finances - for example, the non-dependent contributes towards the cost of house keeping from their own benefits, employment or student income.

The government does not provide any advice on how the family can achieve it - it's a private domestic matter.

BigAunty

PS - I don't think it is very constructive of you to compare your situation with others that appear to be thriving despite not having your work ethic - comparisons are pointless and corrosive. You are not them. Also, worrying about something that is a decade away is very premature - ruminating about issues that may be 10 years in the offing is not a good use of your time and mental energy.

The forum members get your disappointment - it's very palpable that you feel betrayed by the state, your ex, your landlord. You do face some potentially unpleasant changes, none of which you prompted nor deserve.

That said, clinging onto the status quo is a waste of time - you are now a 1 earner household in one of the most expensive parts of the UK in a rental market that is generally unforgiving towards benefit claimants. That's your reality - not what other people are enjoying who you regard as less deserving, not a potential situation in 10 years time.

I hope your viewing goes well, that the property is nice and you get accepted.

Spendless

The maternal side of my family are from London, ever since a relative took up a post to do with the royal navy sometime in the 1800s and there they remained until it got to my Grandmother. She met my Grandad who was from Yorkshire during WW2. After marrying and having my Mum they continued to live in London, they were fortunate enough to find a rented flat, but the job my Grandad has was miles away, he had to catch a bus then a train/tube and for the last 2 miles cycle to work. He rented a shed off someone to store the bike in. They tried to find property closer to his work, but couldn't. There was a lack of housing straight after WW2 (obviously!), he tried to find work closer to home but couldn't. Eventually one of Grandads brothers sent him a job ad he'd seen in a paper back in Yorkshire, Grandad applied and got the job and they all moved to Sheffield. 5 years on my Grandmothers unmarried sister announces she's pregnant and around the same time my Great Grandfather leaves my Great Grandmother for another woman. They too moved to Yorkshire because my Great Grandmother could not afford the rent there alone.

The point I'm making is London has always had expensive costs, and people had to move away to make ends meet even 60+ years ago.

You've got 10 years to make a plan, be able to work different hours, save to cover costs for a couple of years, get further qualifications. I have read that the 'bedroom tax' does not apply when a child is at Uni, I don't know if that is the same for HB, if it is and your child goes it might mean there's a further 3 years for you to sort something out.

sheramber

If someone can't afford to live without benefit it is surprising landlords don't want to rent to those in receipt of benefit in case they lose that benefit and can no longer pay the rent.

[Deleted User]

gettingready wrote: »

What about trying to work smarter rather than harder?

Get some qualifications that will allow you to increase your salary and be self sufficient?

Evening classes when your almost grown up daughter can look after the younger one so you could attend and improve your job/pay prospects? Open University?

I was a single parent most of my life, my daughter is all grown up now and away from home but while she was young I did better myself in every way possible.

You do come across bitter about the "woman with the shiny car" and have a dig between the line about her not having UK qualifications implying she is "foreign". So am I - I came to UK 24 years ago with poor English and a year old child and I managed to come on top. Why can't you if you were born/brought up/schooled here?

I am a foreigner too. I came here 10 years ago (May). I have a undergraduate degree from my country and with it I can do a Masters here. My eX was abusive and unsupportive and that is why I never took a bigger step here to 'better' myself. But I had already finished two British qualifications, opened and closed (due to circumstances) my own business and I am in a very good full time employment albeit still low paid at the moment. I have to say, I got My new job in March 2014 to start in September, working only 2 hours a day in a less desirable position and below my capabilities but by February I was a full timer with a different title (the role I always wanted) and loads more responsibilities. I will take a new role (and even more responsibilities) after Easter…..

But maybe I am not progressing fast enough….(?)

I mentioned about the shiny car because she complains about the low amount of benefits she receives, no maintenance, she is refusing job interviews etc and I remember years ago I suggested (and offered to help) her to open a small business selling cupcakes or Birthday cakes since she is a fantastic baker but she refused, it was too much work….meanwhile she is driving her brand new shiny car (maybe I say shiny because is bright red - I know, not relevant) when she could be walking 10 minutes max to the school. It isn't a mobility car and she has no family here or contact with her eX so I don't know how someone could have bought her a car?
Well, yes, maybe I am jealous of the car, I will admit. I can't drive (fear) and my absolute dream is to learn how to drive and I wouldn't mind having an old battered car at all, as long as I could drive.
Once I solve my housing situation I will overcome my fears and learn (I hope).

[Deleted User]

sheramber wrote: »

If someone can't afford to live without benefit it is surprising landlords don't want to rent to those in receipt of benefit in case they lose that benefit and can no longer pay the rent.

Equally, people who don't earn benefits are at risk of losing their jobs and be unable to pay the rent.
But I know it is a LL's right to accept or refuse whoever they want.

[Deleted User]

FBaby wrote: »

I know that most landlords don't want people on benefits but I would have thought that was mainly in relation to people not working at all rather then those working full time but still need help. Have you made it clear to the agency that you work and ask them to ask landlords if they would make an exception for you?

No, I explain and have all my paperwork/budget at ready to show my income, plus a letter from my LL and employer but here the LLs have so many applicants to chose from, they don't bother. They will go for professional couples without kids or sharers every time, specially in the type of property I am searching (small flats).

gettingready

Deleted_User wrote: »

I am a foreigner too...... I had already finished two British qualifications, opened and closed (due to circumstances) my own business and I am in a very good full time employment albeit still low paid at the moment. I have to say, I got My new job in March 2014 to start in September, working only 2 hours a day in a less desirable position and below my capabilities but by February I was a full timer with a different title (the role I always wanted) and loads more responsibilities. I will take a new role (and even more responsibilities) after Easter…..

But maybe I am not progressing fast enough….(?)

In that case just keep going girl... and demand more money or look for similar job somewhere else that pays more money.

All the best