The Garden Fence - help and support in tough times

Floss

To me, a treat is an unusual event, whereas an indulgence is one that becomes more regular. For example, my monthly visit from my hairdresser and my fortnightly visit for shellac on my nails are indulgences - I can afford them, and as I work in the chief execs office as PA to a senior exec I have an expected appearance to maintain. Some will consider those as an unnecessary expense, which I accept as their view. My treat is the spa day which I will be on tomorrow - £39 for a full body polish and hot stone back massage, glass of champagne and full use of the spa. That happens about once every six months and I really look forward to them.

Hard_Up_Hester

Treat versus indulgence, I'm not sure, I don't buy magazines or clothes or makeup, I do have my hair cut every 3 months, so that could be a treat, I also have a can of diet decaf every weekend, treat or indulgence? Indulgence I suppose. My DD takes me out for a meal once a month, now that is a real treat, no cooking and no clearing up afterwards.

mardatha

Could anybody give me a recipe/idea thingy to jazz up broccoli and cauli? We are doing ok trying to go lower carb with less potatoes but its getting boring. I believe people do strange things like add cream and cheese?? LOL help me!

monnagran

HH: good for you. Go after every penny you are owed........pain and suffering should account for something and cheating on his part should account for the rest.

Silvasava: I was divorced at about the same time as you and the thing that grieves me most is that now the man's pension is counted in his assets. My ex had three pensions going and persuaded me shortly before the balloon went up that money needed to be spent on the house and I might as well cash in my teachers pension as "we were well covered." Poor trusting, naive creature that I was I went along with it. As it was, by the time we got to the divorce I was willing to give him anything just to be rid of him. So I for went any maintenance for myself in order to get a larger portion of the house but my barrister insisted that I got maintenance for the boys. In those days maintenance was made out in the children's names as otherwise the wife would have been taxed on it. Ex showed this to the boys and told them that he was going to give the money straight to them because the court said IT WAS THEIRS.

This brings me to your point Mrs L W. suddenly these boys,aged 11 and 13 had all this pocket money lavished upon them with no need to earn it or account for it. Treats were the order of the day. I did my best at pointing out what the money was really for but what boy of that age is going to cough up money for the gas bill or school shoes when you could be having a great time in the amusement arcade or buying all the latest records. I did insist that they paid for their own school lunches until one of them fainted at school because he had no money left for lunch and had only eaten a slice of toast for breakfast because he was late again.

Just go for it HH. If you succeed you'll be striking a blow for all of us who lost out.


P.S.. Justice comes if you wait long enough. My ex is now in Her Majesty's Pleasure.

x

pollyanna_26

HESTER I had a catch up on your blog last night - blame MONNA .
The little babies top on there took me right back to the seventies . It's very similar to the tops I knitted for my two eldest .They were called angel tops and quite smock like , they buttoned down the back and had a patterned yoke and baby ribbon threaded through the yoke . They were perfect over babygros tights etc . I knitted them for my two youngest many years later . I wish I had a pound for each one I knitted I think they were a Sirdar pattern and as I would never have given that pattern away I now have a quest on my hands for the spring to find the pattern . Thanks for the memory . Stay warm and get well . The blanket you are making is beautiful .
polly

pollyanna_26

Brilliant post MONNA . Re the ex the mills of god eh ?
polly

*zippy*

Oh I had pages here to catch up on this afternoon, you've given me a good laugh it's been a good excuse to ignore the ironing pile

Hester good luck, hope you get your fair share
Happy Birthday to little zebra
And congratulations on your golden wedding Mardatha
Thank you Polly

There's some nice recipes on bbcgoodfood to use up cauli and broccoli, I've made the soup and the caulk/broccoli cheese, both nice x

Poorly pup ended up having b&b in the vets, but thankfully came home yesterday and is on the mend, thank goodness for insurance. It's just me and the dogs today, DH has taken youngest DD to Plymouth as she has her Uni interview tomorrow. Right I suppose I'd better go tackle that ironing pile now

nursemaggie

Oh pollyanna that sounds like a pattern I started in the mid 60s when I was a student nurse. My cousin was expecting. They were called Angel tops and knitted all in one apart from the sleeves. Very complicated they were and I was struggling with it when I got a phone call from my mum to tell me she had had twins 12 weeks early.

There was a patient on my ward who was an exquisite knitter. She had been after sorting out my knitting for me and she finished it and knit another one.

Your right Lyn. We went without chocolate for a long time then I found I could afford to buy some once a month. Now we have it nearly every day.

ivyleaf

Go Hester! Go Hester! :T :T :j :j That's great news.

pollyanna Oh, angel tops! I'd forgotten about those. So cute

Some of you will remember my mentioning my brother in Germany was ill in hospital. They still haven't found out what's causing the problem with his blood, but he's having a blood transfusion as i type, so that should make him feel more perky.
He's been transferred to a big hospital in Munich and seems to be be very well looked-after. Only thing is, it's about 40 miles from the little village where they live, so his wife won't be able to visit him very often. She was meant to have visited today, but it's been snowing hard so he told her to stay home to be on the safe side.

I may be able to fly over and spend a few hours with him at some point, if we can afford the fare.

Hard_Up_Hester

Thank you all for your support, I have to admit I'm scared but I have to try.
Hubby is very supportive, he just said 'How much do you want to spend on a solicitor?'
We've had a chat about the money needed to sort out MIL's will & my settlement, we aren't going in to debt, we will use our savings and see how far it goes.