Wife wants divorce, advice on my financial position

Guest101

VestanPance wrote: »

Get yourself a solicitor asap.

Also paying her £2k a month and living in a place in her name only that only cost £100k! You've been paying all the bills and then some! :eek:

Exactly. It's not uncommon for one partner to keep the budget - I transfer approx £1k to my partner start of the month, which covers approx half the household budget.

The same could be reversed if i was the more organised one!

The point im making is, the OP covered his share (1k) and her share (1k), so what on earth did she spend her wage on?!

fluffnutter

snakebyteuk wrote: »

i transferred £2,000 a month to her every month for the past 3 years (all documented) to cover each and every bill.

Guest101 wrote: »

Why?! :eek::eek:

Why not? They were married. She wasn't earning much. Perhaps that simply represents a fair split of the household income. Or do you think you get married to someone, and they sit there enjoying all their money whilst you scratch around on the bones of your arse?

VestanPance

fluffnutter wrote: »

Why not? They were married. She wasn't earning much. Perhaps that simply represents a fair split of the household income. Or do you think you get married to someone, and they sit there enjoying all their money whilst you scratch around on the bones of your arse?

Standard mortgage repayments on a £100 property, even assuming that no deposit was paid, plus average living expenses wouldn't be £2k a month.

Also if you are going down the fair split route. Why is his name not on the mortgage for a property she bought just two months before they got married, but was happy for him to sink money into doing it up? That's not so much a red flag as a !!!!!!!

fivetide

On a 100k place with a deposit, unless you have a 10 year mortgage, the payments should have been what? All of £500 given the current interest rates?


Council tax, TV, utilities should still all come in for a grand a month so unless you were burning money or also covering the food bills it seems like a very uneven split.


Get a solicitor on the case and protect your investment. Be sure to remove your nuts from her purse when you leave too!

Guest101

fluffnutter wrote: »

Why not? They were married. She wasn't earning much. Perhaps that simply represents a fair split of the household income. Or do you think you get married to someone, and they sit there enjoying all their money whilst you scratch around on the bones of your arse?

RE-read what the OP said.

The 2k covered ALL the bills, not his share of the bills.

His wife wasnt paying anything towards any bills.

Marisco

fluffnutter wrote: »

Why not? They were married. She wasn't earning much. Perhaps that simply represents a fair split of the household income. Or do you think you get married to someone, and they sit there enjoying all their money whilst you scratch around on the bones of your arse?

Because it makes him sound like the lodger, not the husband! And from the other side, I would hate to be "handed over" money like a kept woman, what's wrong in having a "pot in the middle" and everything comes out of it?

misspickle_2

fluffnutter wrote: »

Why not? They were married. She wasn't earning much. Perhaps that simply represents a fair split of the household income. Or do you think you get married to someone, and they sit there enjoying all their money whilst you scratch around on the bones of your arse?

:rotfl: great delivery and did make me lmao.
But its not a third world country!
She could have got a job and given a bit. Instead of take take take.
She's screwed him over!

heartbreak_star

VestanPance wrote: »

Also if you are going down the fair split route. Why is his name not on the mortgage for a property she bought just two months before they got married, but was happy for him to sink money into doing it up? That's not so much a red flag as a !!!!!!!

Credit issues. I'm not on partner's mortgage for the same reason.

HBS x

TBagpuss

OK, first thing you need to do is register your matrimonial home rights via the Land Registry.

Then see a solicitor.

Be aware that in looking at your respective interests in the house, a court will look at the value of the property, and can consider what contributions you have each made.

In your case, the deposit came from joint funds (did you contribute equally to those?) and you have each contributed since then.

The start point will be an equal split, although an unequal split may be fair if one of you has contributed very substantially more, or if there are significant differences between your respective financial needs and resources (i.e. if one of you earns a lot more than that other)

It would be possible for a court to order that the house is sold, if the two of you cannot work something out. It would be possible for you to offer a settlement whereby the house was to be sold but she has first refusal - and you could agree a time scale to give her the chance to raise the money, if you were willing to do so.

You both remain entitled to live in the house in the mean time.

snakebyteuk

Thank you for all the advice, very much appreciate everyone taking the time to offer their advice on the matter.

As far as "why £2k a month" - because the bills (household) came to around £1100 including the mortgage, there were then 2 cars at roughly £350 each and insuraances etc, hence £2k a month and i covered the lot.

What did she spend her wage on? Generally clothes and shoes if i'm honest, but i never minded, a mug? maybe, but i earned a lot more and needed very much less in terms of material items to keep me happy, i'm a simple bloke!

Everyone keeps telling me to leave the house but the only bit of actual legal advice i received from a solicitor in the family was to stay put and under no circumstances leave the property as it could and would be detrimental, not sure how or why but thats the advice i was given.

I will be booking to appoint a solicitor this week and hopefully get the ball rolling, following registering my interest with the land registry.

Horrible situation, i will learn from my mistakes, i guarantee it, just a very expensive mistake to make but we do all make them.