bit upset by MIL's careless comment

ariba10

We have a son amongst our children and is known and called "Frank" even by his siblings children.

He is his mothers blue eyed boy. (Frank Sinatra)

Hard_Up_Hester

She probably didn't mean anything by it, I have to admit I'm scared to say anything to my DIL's in case it's taken the wrong way.
My ex MIL, at various times told my ex hubby that our child wasn't his as the baby had blue eyes (ex hubby's Dad has blue eyes).
She told EVERYONE that my pregnancy problems were caused by my promiscuity (I had placenta previa)
The list goes on but I think her remarks were made out of spite, not by mistake.
Hester

pollypenny

ariba10 wrote: »

"There is no woman yet born that is good enough for any Mothers son"

My DIL is lovely and is very good for my son.

misspickle_2

pollypenny wrote: »

My DIL is lovely and is very good for my son.

I still thank the lord I had a daughter

fluffnutter

It seems a fairly mild comment to me, particularly if she's the over-protective sort.

So what did your husband say in answer, OP? It's his job to stick up for you.

fluffnutter

ariba10 wrote: »

"There is no woman yet born that is good enough for any Mothers son"

I don't feel like this. I want my son to have happy relationships with loving women and the best way I can think of helping him to do this is to not bring him up thinking the sun shines out of his botty.

My MIL loves me to bits (as I do her). Not every woman is precious about their sons.

jess1974

barbiedoll wrote: »

Yes, it's the only time you get to have a proper cuddle with your teenagers is when they're ill!

Or when they want money or a lift somewhere !!! x

Pearlstar

I have both sons and daughter and no one is really good enough for them

Savvy_Sue

Grimbal wrote: »

Hubby is not well at the moment, he has a lung infection. MIL calls up and whilst chatting, asks "so is (me) looking after you, or are you having to look after yourself?"


I am a little upset at the implication that I wouldn't be looking after my sick husband. It feels like there was always a question about whether I was capable, or indeed wanted to, look after him.


Would you be a little disgruntled by that comment too?

It is exactly the kind of thing my mother would have asked, and she'd have kind of meant it. But I wouldn't have let it upset me, because I knew what she was like.

And it is the kind of thing I ask my sons, although they have no-one to look after them, so I'll ask (what they consider) a dumb question. And I just get a 'look'. Even if they're not with me, I can feel the 'look', even across an email.

Practise the 'look'.

barbiedoll wrote: »

Yes, it's the only time you get to have a proper cuddle with your teenagers is when they're ill!

Mine were never THAT ill!

jess1974 wrote: »

Or when they want money or a lift somewhere !!! x

Not even then ...

Kynthia

She either meant it as a dig at your skills as a caring wife, or as a way of finding out whether her son was ill enough to need looking after, or as a jokey way of starting a conversation. We can't really know as we'd need to know what she's like and your history. However the comment can only bother you if you let it. You know that you're caring for your husband so shrug it off and have more confidence in yourself.