sisters wedding

Hermia

mogwai wrote: »

Think people are being a bit mean to the OP - I agree your sister should have told you once things were booked, esp if you have to book tickets, make arrangements etc.

I think the strong reactions were to the bit where the OP said she was a "gobby cow" who can't stop herself saying something and had already planned what she would say. Maybe I misread her post, but it sounded like she wasn't going to make too much effort to stop herself saying something snarky to her sister. I can understand the OP feeling upset, but she needs to deal with it in a constructive way. I am sure the sister misjudged the situation rather than deliberately hurting the OP.

pickledonionspaceraider

I think as well, that it comes across as if the OP has waited for the first possible teeny issue, so she can cause a problem

pollypenny

mogwai wrote: »

Think people are being a bit mean to the OP - I agree your sister should have told you once things were booked, esp if you have to book tickets, make arrangements etc.

However I would not make a big issue of it with your sister OP, I would just call her and ask her in a light hearted way why she hadn't let you know yet..maybe she's a bit ditsy and thought she had already told you (I'm like this so can totally believe this might have been the case!)..good luck and resist the temptation to make it a serious issue!

My comment about the OP being childish was more about her rambling opening post.

Did we need blow by blow?

oliviacam

I have not demanded anything.

I would just have liked to have heard from my sister that she had booked and finalised her wedding, and all her plans were in place.
Not sat here 7 days later with hearing nothing from her.
As if it was me, my 1st port of calls would be my daughter, parents,sister.


And to the people who have pm,d me I have replied to them, thank you.


Thanks for those helpful comments.

Flick216

I have often text someone and not realised the text did did not go through - or that I did not press send properly - could this have happened? Especially if your sister is rushing to tell loads of people.

Pollycat

pollypenny wrote: »

My comment about the OP being childish was more about her rambling opening post.

Especially the bit I've highlighted in red - I think the OP has done her best to make her Mum feel bad about this:

oliviacam wrote: »

hi old user new name, because family know my old name.

Right here goes, my sister is getting married next year, 18 months time, abroad for the 1st time, she is 45, and were really happy for her and saving up already.

Now last week she has booked the wedding, date sorted, venue, time.
I only found out because my daughter rang her yesterday and she was at the hairdressers, and she said oh I was just telling the hairdresser about the wedding plans. So my daughter told me last night.
Today on the phone to my mum I said I believe our sam has booked the wedding, and then mum started gushing, (understandable) about the arrangements, at the end I said, oh it would have been nice to get a call/text about it,
mum said oh she only booked it last week, I said last week, she's had 7 days to ring/text me, mum said, oh she'll be busy with work, I just said to mum got to go now.

now I know my mum, she will probably say to my sister when she next speaks to her, have you not told our *** about the plans.
and I'm expecting a text/call after this, well it's not come in the past week, so can't see it coming soon.
I can't understand it because we are a closeish family, theres me my sister and my 30 year old daughter, and we are always together for birthdays/Christmas/easter/mothers fathers day and stay in touch.
I would have thought she would have jokingly text me and said hi booked the wedding save ***** in your diary...........but zilch nothing, my daughter said she feels as if she hadn't rang her yesterday she wouldn't have known.

now here is my problem, I'm a gobby cow, and things go round and round in my head, and I tend to say stuff as it comes into my head.
I've already in my head got planned to say, if or when she texts me, to say 'congratulations, I heard through the grapevine you was getting married'
Hubbys pooed off already, as we've sat down and done a bit of cost cutting and extra shifts at work to save for the wedding and he's unhappy that we've heard nothing, as he's out tonight doing a extra shift.

am I wrong in feeling hurt.......cause that is how I feel at the moment.

duchy

I suspect this is where the childish comments have come from ......a forty something year old trying to involve Mum into the situation. Presumably the OP and her sister are around the same age and should be capable of sorting things out in an adult manner between them rather than trying to drag Mum into it.

From the sister's perspective
"I've finally booked my wedding and the next day mentioned it to my hairdresser as I want to make sure she will be available before we go away as I want my hair done right before we go away"

I know my sister knows we've booked it and has thrown a hissy fit at my Mum and niece over it already. So I would sound really stupid ringing her now to tell her. She can be really gobby and I really don't want her kicking off and spoiling what should be a really happy time for all the family.

It's now a week later- I know she knows about it -so why hasn't she contacted me ? If it was me I would be on the phone asking when we were getting together to make plans ..... She must know I know she knows and she's just blanking me. Do you think she's looking for excuses not to attend the wedding (I realize it'll be expensive for her)

Pollycat

oliviacam wrote: »

I have not demanded anything.

I would just have liked to have heard from my sister that she had booked and finalised her wedding, and all her plans were in place.
Not sat here 7 days later with hearing nothing from her.
As if it was me, my 1st port of calls would be my daughter, parents,sister.

It wouldn't surprise me if your Mum has told your sister that you were 'off' with her so your sister has decided to leave you to stew.

If it were me, I'd send a text along the lines of 'Mum's mentioned that you've finalised your wedding plans. I'm so excited for you. Would love to meet up for a coffee and a catch-up. '

peachyprice

It's threads like these that make me glad I don't have a sister!

FatVonD

I read through the original post expecting to come to a bit where you are double booked for the date but then it all became a bit of a non issue.

Purely because of where I was at the time I heard my workmates have heard about offers being accepted on houses before I've told my husband and a workmate knew I was pregnant before my parents did, these things happen.

I do think it's a bit rude if you didn't have exact dates and you need to book yourselves not to tell you but presumably she knows you know now and I'm not sure that was the case. What exactly is it that she's booked that you are so miffed about? Is it the ceremony because presumably if it was accommodation and you are paying she would have needed your deposit?

I think you need to clarify a bit more why practically you need to be the first to know before you'll gain any sympathy here.