If you are single....

Buffythedebtslayer

TheMagician wrote: »

Just wanted to thank kingfisherblue for starting this thread, I think it's incredibly insightful and has reminded me of so many reasons why I miss being partnered up. Sometimes you just feel that longing but this has helped me list at least 50+ reasons in my head why.

I think my post was misunderstood because people misread the start of it where I said 'I've been terribly missing'.
Yes, I still went to As*a and cleaned the windows when I was partnered up, I just don't miss those things

I'm completely self sufficient and very confident in myself, I don't need a man, but I do love men

Have you not watched a silly film like Anchorman and just spent the whole length of it laughing hysterically together at how completely ridiculous it is?
I loved when my man knew to text me 5min before coming home and I'd make him a cup of tea, and he'd do the same to me.
I loved it when he drove past a coffee shop at 2pm to grab me a coffee and drop it off at work.
I loved the smell of him.
I loved a little look I'd give him whilst having dinner at friends' and we both knew what it meant and couldn't wait to get home.
I loved how he'd suddenly hug me from behind and give me tingles all over.
I loved how we knew how each other was feeling just from hearing their voice on the phone.
God, I could be here all night. Maybe I'm one of the few, I didn't realise, but this is how I've always seen relationships and I guess I've attracted this sort of men.
It's feminine beauty and sensuality mixed with male's strength and prowess and powered by utter love, care and respect for each other.
This is what love is to me and I'll accept no less, this is all I know.

Yes, there's the mundane every day stuff and jobs and kids and whatever else, but it doesn't take away from being able to show your feelings to your partner and how much you appreciate them, even if it's just a kiss and a cup of tea.

January20 don't apologise, I did not feel ridiculed. All of our experiences are different. I am not naive but I am romantic to the bone and always will be and my heart aches for that someone and it tells me to wait, which I will.

Yes. I would love all of that. I had it once for about 7 months. I was so happy. So so happy.


He was married.


Edited to add, I didn't know he was married, he gave me the I am separated line and I believed him. I was happy tho.

purpleshoes_2

TheMagician wrote: »

Just wanted to thank kingfisherblue for starting this thread, I think it's incredibly insightful and has reminded me of so many reasons why I miss being partnered up. Sometimes you just feel that longing but this has helped me list at least 50+ reasons in my head why.

I think my post was misunderstood because people misread the start of it where I said 'I've been terribly missing'.
Yes, I still went to As*a and cleaned the windows when I was partnered up, I just don't miss those things

I'm completely self sufficient and very confident in myself, I don't need a man, but I do love men

Have you not watched a silly film like Anchorman and just spent the whole length of it laughing hysterically together at how completely ridiculous it is?
I loved when my man knew to text me 5min before coming home and I'd make him a cup of tea, and he'd do the same to me.
I loved it when he drove past a coffee shop at 2pm to grab me a coffee and drop it off at work.
I loved the smell of him.
I loved a little look I'd give him whilst having dinner at friends' and we both knew what it meant and couldn't wait to get home.
I loved how he'd suddenly hug me from behind and give me tingles all over.
I loved how we knew how each other was feeling just from hearing their voice on the phone.
God, I could be here all night. Maybe I'm one of the few, I didn't realise, but this is how I've always seen relationships and I guess I've attracted this sort of men.
It's feminine beauty and sensuality mixed with male's strength and prowess and powered by utter love, care and respect for each other.
This is what love is to me and I'll accept no less, this is all I know.

Yes, there's the mundane every day stuff and jobs and kids and whatever else, but it doesn't take away from being able to show your feelings to your partner and how much you appreciate them, even if it's just a kiss and a cup of tea.

January20 don't apologise, I did not feel ridiculed. All of our experiences are different. I am not naive but I am romantic to the bone and always will be and my heart aches for that someone and it tells me to wait, which I will.

But that relationship ended, so for all the lovey dovey stuff, it didn't go the distance.

Plus anyone can look at the past with rose tinted specs on.

You might fall in love with someone who is as romantic as a brick, but you know they love you anyway.

Its not always about the gestures, sometimes people just need to be.

purpleshoes_2

Buffythedebtslayer wrote: »

Yes. I would love all of that. I had it once for about 7 months. I was so happy. So so happy.


He was married.

I wonder if his wife felt the same.

Soleil_lune

purpleshoes wrote: »

But that relationship ended, so for all the lovey dovey stuff, it didn't go the distance.

Plus anyone can look at the past with rose tinted specs on.

You might fall in love with someone who is as romantic as a brick, but you know they love you anyway.

Its not always about the gestures, sometimes people just need to be.

Well quite! It's all very well trying to make out a relationship was wonderful, and like something from a romcom, but it can't have been that great if it ended. Obviously something wasn't right was it?

I mean, you can be in a relationship for say 18-20 years or so, and think that everything is amazing and wonderful, and your partner is as happy as a pig in muck, when all along they have been rather miserable, and have spent the last few years cheating on you, before they finally got round to dumping you.

I am sure 'The Magician' is a very nice lady, and her heart is in the right place, but what she describes is not like any relationship I have ever known. Well, maybe for the first 3-4 months, or if it's an affair, (like buffythedebtslayer said,) but certainly not a normal long term relationship.

byjimini

I had a girlfriend for 3 months when I was 17, and another for 3 months when I was 26. I turn 30 in the summer.

It's my own stupid fault, really. I've been unambitious for years, still live at home, and don't really get out much. I started 2015 with a plan to save more for a deposit, get out and meet people and get myself fit. 6 weeks in and I'm very happy, though yet to meet anyone single with a mutual feeling.

Keep calm and carry on, and all that jazz.

Pyxis

purpleshoes wrote: »

But that relationship ended, so for all the lovey dovey stuff, it didn't go the distance.
.

Has it not occurred to anyone that he might have died?

purpleshoes_2

Pyxis wrote: »

Has it not occurred to anyone that he might have died?

Ive actually mentioned partners dying in a couple of posts, I could be wrong but I think if he had, the poster would have mentioned it.

purpleshoes_2

Soleil_lune wrote: »

Well quite! It's all very well trying to make out a relationship was wonderful, and like something from a romcom, but it can't have been that great if it ended. Obviously something wasn't right was it?

I mean, you can be in a relationship for say 18-20 years or so, and think that everything is amazing and wonderful, and your partner is as happy as a pig in muck, when all along they have been rather miserable, and have spent the last few years cheating on you, before they finally got round to dumping you.

I am sure 'The Magician' is a very nice lady, and her heart is in the right place, but what she describes is not like any relationship I have ever known. Well, maybe for the first 3-4 months, or if it's an affair, (like buffythedebtslayer said,) but certainly not a normal long term relationship.

I agree, its like the honeymoon period. Rose tinted specs with a great big whiff of gorgonzola cheese.

Seriously, romance day in and day out would grate on most people's nerves after a while.

Soleil_lune

Pyxis wrote: »

Has it not occurred to anyone that he might have died?

purpleshoes wrote:

I've actually mentioned partners dying in a couple of posts, I could be wrong but I think if he had, the poster would have mentioned it.

Pyxis; yes purpleshoes did say that a couple of times. That a partner may have died.

purpleshoes wrote: »

I agree, its like the honeymoon period. Rose tinted specs with a great big whiff of gorgonzola cheese.

Seriously, romance day in and day out would grate on most people's nerves after a while.

:rotfl:

As for your last sentence, I have to agree. Maybe we are just a couple of old cynics but I would find my man hugging and grabbing me every ten minutes and trying to grope and smooch me, and always trying to hold my hand everywhere we go, and nuzzling my ear, and kissing my neck, all the time, day in, day out, somewhat irritating.

We love each other a lot, and neither of us is in any doubt about that, but we don't need to keep kissing, smooching, hugging, and tonsil wrestling and buying gifts and flowers every other week to prove it! Of course we hug and smooch sometimes, but not all the time!

We have different ways of showing we care, and that we love each other.

In addition, (like I think someone touched on earlier, maybe you purpleshoes,) I have known a number of couples who seem to be all close and lovey dovey and smoochy, and one of them is cheating on the side, and has been for years!

Being a super duper smoochy woochy couple means nothing. It really doesn't.

torbrex

Marraiges may be made in heaven but you have to do your own maintenance.