If you are single....

bugslet

torbrex wrote: »

Why is it this thread makes me feel I need to appologise to all the women posting on it?

.

You don't! There are some rubbish women out there as well that go and slope off with another chap and play games in relationships.

Most of the time I was happy with Mr Bugs, the good outweighed the bad bits.

SanguineSteve

Kim_kim wrote: »

I would like to me Mr wonderful "for me".
He can be rather ordinary, I am!
Just be nice if we created some extraordinary magic between us physically.
And stimulated each other's minds.
Someone I click with.
Someone without hang ups or weirdnesses!

I think you have high expectations, any human will have 'hang ups and weirdnesses'.

purpleshoes_2

TheMagician wrote: »

I've been single for 2.5yrs and recently I've been terribly missing the uncontrollable laughs together, talking through the night, dancing for hours, going to nice restaurants for meals, having extended family of in-laws, sensual kissing that leads to intimate times, long walks and hikes, holding hands, looking into someone's eyes and just feeling utterly happy, the feel of a strong and protective man's body, being completely adored and wanted, someone to look after and him to look after me, showers and baths together, giving and receiving compliments, giving each other surprises, hugs, someone to cuddle up to at night, I honestly could go on and on.

I am hoping with all my heart I will meet my soulmate. I am not prepared to be just with anyone, I could do that tomorrow. He has to be my one and only.

I believe that when you're in a healthy relationship, you won't feel suppressed or controlled in any way or made to feel guilty for spending money on yourself.

You can always buy a super king size bed for room.
And get an extra en suite bathroom.
But you can only spend so long with your loved one before the clock is up.

But if those ex relationships were so fabulous, you'd still be in them.

Unless someone died that is.

Even relationships with your soulmate can take a lot of work, its not all hearts and flowers.

My view is, if you are happy being single a good relationship if it comes will be a bonus.

Soleil_lune

TheMagician wrote: »

I've been single for 2.5yrs and recently I've been terribly missing the uncontrollable laughs together, talking through the night, dancing for hours, going to nice restaurants for meals, having extended family of in-laws, sensual kissing that leads to intimate times, long walks and hikes, holding hands, looking into someone's eyes and just feeling utterly happy, the feel of a strong and protective man's body, being completely adored and wanted, someone to look after and him to look after me, showers and baths together, giving and receiving compliments, giving each other surprises, hugs, someone to cuddle up to at night, I honestly could go on and on.

I am hoping with all my heart I will meet my soulmate. I am not prepared to be just with anyone, I could do that tomorrow. He has to be my one and only.

I believe that when you're in a healthy relationship, you won't feel suppressed or controlled in any way or made to feel guilty for spending money on yourself.

You can always buy a super king size bed for room.
And get an extra en suite bathroom.
But you can only spend so long with your loved one before the clock is up.

January20 wrote: »

Ah! To be young and romantic and still believe life is just like in a romantic comedy :rotfl::rotfl:

I clearly need to work on my cynicism

purpleshoes wrote: »

But if those ex relationships were so fabulous, you'd still be in them.

Unless someone died that is.

Even relationships with your soulmate can take a lot of work, its not all hearts and flowers.

My view is, if you are happy being single a good relationship if it comes will be a bonus.

Sorry 'The Magician,' I have to sadly echo the cynical views of Jan and Purpleshoes, the content of your post does sound like a script from a cheesy romcom, and nothing like real life at all. Yes of course people in couples have good times together, but I don't think anyone can say that they have ever been in a relationship like the one you describe. (Well, maybe for the first couple of months!) As for the wonderful thought of the extended family bit. I think many posters will hoot at that one!

Have you been in a long-term relationship before 'The Magician?' Or have you just been watching too many rom coms?! Just wondered, as I don't know of anyone in a relationship like you have described.

Maybe you should think about writing some chick-lit?

VestanPance

I'd disagree with the last few posters, it doesn't sound unusual to me. It sounds fairly close to what I experienced for 18 years of my relationship (not the closeness of a manly body though!).

From what I've seen the best relationships don't require a lot of work. Those that do are trying to patch over the incompatibility issues they have.

I do laugh at the constant "bad relationship" comments that many singles throw around. It's the exact thing they throw a fit about if coupled up people give them the "poor single person" speech. Two sides of the same bloody coin.

bargainbetty

I'm quite happy single, and entirely comfortable with my own company. I'd find it fairly difficult to share my space after a few years on my own, but I wouldn't reject a person because of it, if something that seemed warm and real came along.

I've got little idea of what I would want in a person, but the time alone (and in short term relationships) has given me a far better idea of what I won't tolerate in a partner. I think it might be better to reject a person for casual racism than because he doesn't have a high-powered job etc... If you set ideals, you'll often be disappointed.

I'd be happy with the imperfect.

Soleil_lune

VestanPance wrote: »

I'd disagree with the last few posters, it doesn't sound unusual to me. It sounds fairly close to what I experienced for 18 years of my relationship (not the closeness of a manly body though!).

From what I've seen the best relationships don't require a lot of work. Those that do are trying to patch over the incompatibility issues they have.

I do laugh at the constant "bad relationship" comments that many singles throw around. It's the exact thing they throw a fit about if coupled up people give them the "poor single person" speech. Two sides of the same bloody coin.

Given the content of the posts you constantly put on here, the irony in this post is off the scale. :rotfl:

And sure, good relationships don't necessarily require 'a lot of work,' but to say that most relationships are like the one The Magician described in his/her post is ridiculous.

All dancing and laughing and cuddling and kissing and smooching passionately until it leads to that 'ultimate intimate moment' and the lovely in-laws and the hikes and the late night talking and the wonderful hugs and the special looks and the laughing til your sides split, looking into each others eyes and being utterly hapy, and longing for that person with all your heart!

Come on! Those words were straight out of a cheesy rom com. That kind of relationship only exists in the movies. :cool:

Of course many people/couples have good relationships, but nobody has a relationship like that! It's like these people who say they never ever argue.... and they are happier than anyone they know, and then they end up splitting up, after one discovers the other has been cheating for a year!!!

purpleshoes_2

Maybe some of us have been in bad relationships and would prefer to be single until someone who treated us well came along.

Btw I don't throw fits if anyone refers to me as a poor single, not that anyone in my life does as it happens, they like me for me and I like them for them, our single or coupled up status isn't an issue.

My gran was married for 35 years until her husband died, I know fine well two people can meet and marry and be absolutely in love with one another, but they went through tough times, that was my point above, even the best relationships can hit hurdles, its not always like a romantic novel.

System

Even relationships with your soulmate can take a lot of work, its not all hearts and flowers.

I agree with this. I'll even add it takes a great deal of commitment from both parties to work things through.

purpleshoes_2

Soleil_lune wrote: »

Given the content of the posts you constantly put on here, the irony in this post is off the scale. :rotfl:

And sure, good relationships don't necessarily require 'a lot of work,' but to say that most relationships are like the one The Magician described in his/her post is ridiculous.

All dancing and laughing and cuddling and kissing and smooching passionately until it leads to that 'ultimate intimate moment' and the lovely in-laws and the hikes and the late night talking and the wonderful hugs and the special looks and the laughing til your sides split, looking into each others eyes and being utterly hapy, ad longing for that person with all your heart!

Come on! Those words were straight out of a cheesy rom com. That kind of relationship only exists in the movies. :cool:

Well I do think it a bit odd, someone who was in a long term relationship which ended and who has made posts saying they have no interest in dating again is calling other people out just for saying that even the best relationships can need effort.

I've been in relationships where I was treated very badly. That doesn't mean I'd never be open to dating someone again, but it means that I'd never go back to a relationship like that.

It's not a competition, as in, I was happy with someone for X amount of years and then it went belly up so I'm superior to you because you've been in relationships that were a lot of hard work that you left.

Give us a break.