Miserly friends

j.e.j.

pickledonionspaceraider wrote: »

That is really unfair IMO - and well done to him for not bowing to peer pressure and office politics

Unless I work with a friend, I would never give money to a colleague just because by default we share the same air at work.

Ah but would you take/receive money or gifts?

He was fine with cadging and taking and generally poncing off people, but not with giving anything back.

jumpingjackd

pickledonionspaceraider wrote: »

That is really unfair IMO - and well done to him for not bowing to peer pressure and office politics

Unless I work with a friend, I would never give money to a colleague just because by default we share the same air at work.

Do hope you dont accept anything presented to you, although by your atittude I suspect there may not be a collection made in the office for you for any reason and hey be quite right, Try loosening the purse strings a little and being a bit more compassionate towards your fellow human beings!! What goes around comes around!!

Thistle-down

jumpingjackd wrote: »

Try loosening the purse strings a little and being a bit more compassionate towards your fellow human beings!! What goes around comes around!!

It can get overwhelming - I used to work at our local hospital and each shift there was someone (or two or three) collecting for someone's birthday or leaving present, selling something to raise money, someone's granddaughter's brownie group needing something, or the air ambulance raffle... it never stopped. There was a lot of pressure to give. Many of them were very worthy causes but had I given to all of them, I would have had very little of my pay left.

jaylee3

jumpingjackd wrote: »

Do hope you dont accept anything presented to you, although by your atittude I suspect there may not be a collection made in the office for you for any reason and hey be quite right, Try loosening the purse strings a little and being a bit more compassionate towards your fellow human beings!! What goes around comes around!!

Sorry but I think those comments are very unfair.

In some offices/workplaces, if you were to give something every time someone came around with a brown envelope begging and cadging, (for yet another blasted collection!) most people would never have any money for their own family and friends! Sometimes it's ridiculous: a collection for a leaver every month, someone's birthday twice a month, someone's engagement party, someone's 30th, someone's 40th and so on and so on. It gets exasperating!

I worked in a place like this up to 3 years ago, and it got me down. People should not be expected to put into every collection going! People need to be firm and make it clear they do not wish to take part, and consequently, have no desire to have anything bought for them.

I have enough family to spend on (and friends!) without having to fork out once a week or so for someone I hardly know in my workplace. 'What goes around come around?' So nobody at work buys for me? GOOD. I don't WANT anything. I have plenty of family and friends who buy for me!

Thankfully, the place I work now has only 5 of us in my office. When there is a birthday, (and at Christmas) we go to the pub and have a meal.

Not everyone is made of money you know, and even if they are, it's not your place - or anyone else's - to tell them how to spend it, or to try to make them feel bad, or guilty, if they choose to not contribute to every collection at work.

jumpingjackd

Thistle-down wrote: »

It can get overwhelming - I used to work at our local hospital and each shift there was someone (or two or three) collecting for someone's birthday or leaving present, selling something to raise money, someone's granddaughter's brownie group needing something, or the air ambulance raffle... it never stopped. There was a lot of pressure to give. Many of them were very worthy causes but had I given to all of them, I would have had very little of my pay left.

Thats perfectly understandable. With four kids there was always a collection going around, We gave as much as we could but sometimes had to stop. Its the ones who refuse to give a penny to anything regardless

jaylee3

jumpingjackd wrote: »

Thats perfectly understandable. With four kids there was always a collection going around, We gave as much as we could but sometimes had to stop. Its the ones who refuse to give a penny to anything regardless

That is THEIR prerogative. As long as they make it clear they will not accept anything, a person has every right to not give to any collection. It is not your place to accuse people of being mean and tight, because they do not spend their money on collections for people at work.

Anyway, this thread is not even about that! It's about people making others spend on stuff and not offering anything back, and using people for financial gain.

Refusing to contribute to office collections (which can often be weekly in some places!) is not the same as being a tight-wad who doesn't buy things for people who buy for them, and doesn't share. It's completely different.

jumpingjackd

jaylee3 wrote: »

Sorry but I think those comments are very unfair.

In some offices/workplaces, if you were to give something every time someone came around with a brown envelope begging and cadging, (for yet another blasted collection!) most people would never have any money for their own family and friends! Sometimes it's ridiculous: a collection for a leaver every month, someone's birthday twice a month, someone's engagement party, someone's 30th, someone's 40th and so on and so on. It gets exasperating!

I worked in a place like this up to 3 years ago, and it got me down. People should not be expected to put into every collection going! People need to be firm and make it clear they do not wish to take part, and consequently, have no desire to have anything bought for them.

I have enough family to spend on (and friends!) without having to fork out once a week or so for someone I hardly know in my workplace. 'What goes around come around?' So nobody at work buys for me? GOOD. I don't WANT anything. I have plenty of family and friends who buy for me!

Thankfully, the place I work now has only 5 of us in my office. When there is a birthday, (and at Christmas) we go to the pub and have a meal.

Not everyone is made of money you know, and even if they are, it's not your place - or anyone else's - to tell them how to spend it, or to try to make them feel bad, or guilty, if they choose to not contribute to every collection at work.

Not sure why you think my comments are unfair?? Poster refuses to contribute to any work place collection so why should he accept any for him freely?

I know we are not all made of money, why would you think I am? I choose to contribute to any collecions as and when I can afford and dont just refuse to contribute to any out of hand as a matter of principal!

Jagraf

I feel like this about people who come into work late and then don't offer to make up the time.

jumpingjackd

jaylee3 wrote: »

That is THEIR prerogative. As long as they make it clear they will not accept anything, a person has every right to not give to any collection. It is not your place to accuse people of being mean and tight, because they do not spend their money on collections for people at work.

Anyway, this thread is not even about that! It's about people making others spend on stuff and not offering anything back, and using people for financial gain.

Refusing to contribute to office collections (which can often be weekly in some places!) is not the same as being a tight-wad who doesn't buy things for people who buy for them, and doesn't share. It's completely different.

Yes its not my place and I didnt actually accuse them of being mean and tight, where did you read that?? I said they should not accept any collection for them when they refuse to contribute to others. Hmmm opinions differ

Try taking a wee bit of time to read more closely to what has been said. And not going by what you perceive has been said to fit in with your conscience

pickledonionspaceraider

jumpingjackd wrote: »

Do hope you dont accept anything presented to you, although by your atittude I suspect there may not be a collection made in the office for you for any reason and hey be quite right, Try loosening the purse strings a little and being a bit more compassionate towards your fellow human beings!! What goes around comes around!!

Is your idea of compassion towards fellow humans threatening them with karma, when they have a different opinion to you in terms of they should spend their own hard earned money?

Compassion towards fellow humans has nothing to do with money, it is about respecting other peoples opinions.

In terms of ''putting money in an envelope because ''Bob'' on the 6th floor who I have only ever spoken to twice in 5 years, has chosen to leave, - and I find myself asking '' Who is Bob?''.

And in answer to you, No I have long since opted out of any office whip arounds and do not partake either way - it is completely accepted in our office, some do, some don't. I could not imagine anything worse than a present brought, in part, by people who barely know my name.