Boyfriend potentially owes his ex money, advice needed please

kitrat

Rambosmum wrote: »

I'd wait for the solicitors letter if I were you - she might be bluffing. In the mean time put the money aside in case it arrives.

If it does arrive then a response, in writing to the solicitor from your boyfriend with a breakdown of the loss of contents against the value of the loan may stave her off.

in the mean time if she tries to contact your boyfriend tell him to tell her all correspondence from now on should be in writing (paper and pen, not text message or email).

Thanks, I think this is the best approach for now. Thanks all for the advice but I guess this is all largely speculation until something actually happens. I will come back if it does.

Person_one

kitrat wrote: »

Definitely jointly owned. He was only given one morning to come back into then house and remove his things so his ability to take anything away was limited by that. Tricky tricky I dont really know what the consensus is on what to do. It is tempting to offer her a reasonable sum and then leave her to it. He has offered her a further £400 to settle but she has refused it.

If they were jointly owned he couldn't have just taken them anyway, however much time he had. How long were they living together and using this stuff?

BitterAndTwisted

If she decides to try to enforce repayment by court proceedings and the court finds in her favour, they could decide to award her costs against him. In the fast track/small claims this would probably amount to about fifty quid.

I'd go the no contact/response route as I think she'd be unlikely to stoop that low considering she prevented him from taking any of the jointly-owned possessions.

She must have been really bl**dy angry with him to have chucked him out with only a few hours notice. In your position I'd be more interested in the reasons for that rather than the money considered unpaid.

tomtontom

kitrat wrote: »

I haven't had a chance to chat with him face-to-face about it yet so I'm not sure but I expect as she sounds like a rather difficult character he may have just come to the end of his tether with her and snapped back a bit. I think he resents all the stuff he lost from her and yet she doesn't feel any responsibility to him for that.

Isn't this just what anyone would say about their ex to their new bit? He's not going to tell you he was an a*se and deserved to be chucked out is he!

I've been in your boat, heard the same story, and then six months later he was telling that story about me - and I'd got rid of him for being a lying cheat. I'd take anything he says about her with a pinch of salt.

kitrat

Person_one wrote: »

If they were jointly owned he couldn't have just taken them anyway, however much time he had. How long were they living together and using this stuff?

Indeed. 4 years.

As to the rest if the comments I understand your thoughts and had the same questions myself, this is not the first time I've heard of all this and we have spoken about it before and I have come to my own decisions about it.

Poppops

I really would just pay it back. It started as a loan, so at the point he received the money he fully accepted and intended to pay it back. Forget what was said in between. She was good enough to loan him the money in the first place, she said it didn't need paid back whilst they were together, but they aren't now.

I think he would be forced to pay it back in court anyway. He has no proof she said it was a gift.

But I don't think that's why he should pay it. He should return her money because it is the right thing to do.

lindsaygalaxy

You are going to a solicitor to fight £700? It will probably cost you more than this in fees seeing one - think around £120- £160 an hour, £90 a letter plus costs for emails and phonecalls. If she takes him to small claims he may also get the costs put ontop. He was paying it - I'm guessing he agreed to pay it back.

I would pay it back and move on.

FBaby

I just wonder if it would be beneficial to write a letter offering an amount minus a bit considering she kept all the household furnishings that he paid half of. I believe he's been arguing this from the beginning but she won't accept it. It don't expect she will ever accept it either.

Could it be that they are stuck in a vicious circle in that she won't discuss him having some of the furniture because he is not agreeing to pay the rest of the loan, that if he paid it, then maybe she would consider an arrangement for the furniture? Do you actually know who paid what for the furniture? Does he have any receipts? Were these paid in full or on credit cards? Are they all repaid?

What kind of insurance cost £1300? Also, it is not usually something you would give as a gift, so not helping him.

Mojisola

kitrat wrote: »

BF was given money by his ex-GF when they were seeing each other, she said 4 years ago when they moved in together that he didn't have to pay her back.

When they broke up a year ago she decided she wanted the money back, he has been paying her back and has paid £600.

He has now basically told her to get lost and see a solicitor if she wants any more money, she says she has done so and he can expect a letter soon demanding £700.

He wouldn't have started paying her back if he really believed the money had been a gift.

By starting repayments, he's accepted it was a debt and needs to pay the rest of it back.

Person_one

kitrat wrote: »

Indeed. 4 years.

As to the rest if the comments I understand your thoughts and had the same questions myself, this is not the first time I've heard of all this and we have spoken about it before and I have come to my own decisions about it.

Ok, so he should just forget any idea that she owes him money for household stuff they bought jointly and then jointly used for 4 years. He got his money's worth, and it won't have any value now anyway.