We all need to be heard for a little while.

Birdie85

Oooh Tangled is my FAVOURITE! Even more than Frozen! Please watch it, everyone! We have a couple of Pascals (her chameleon friend ) hidden around our flat and a 20" tall Rapunzel doll pride of place in our living room! When we went to Disney World on our honeymoon we queued for 45 minutes to meet 'her', we hadn't planned to but once we'd committed we couldn't walk away after wasting so long waiting already! She was great though, we kept asking silly questions about the characters in the film and she answered each one perfectly! **End nerdgasm**

Great news about being approved Tea! :T Hope it all moves quickly now!

Sounds like you've got lots to look forward to MU, a date too! Hope it goes well.

ETA: Cross posted! Hope FOH does get his butt in gear and finds somewhere. I have a feeling he'll drag his feet, either on purpose or just because he's not used to doing anything for himself... Has he got family/friends he can stay with once he's not longer welcome in your house? Would you be willing to do a little legwork to find him a flat just so he gets out of your hair quicker?

codemonkey

*grabs Birdie and starts singing 'I've got a dream'*

tea_lover

Birdie - I would be willing to build him a house

codemonkey

Just seen your post tea. Just remember, he started all this, so can't play the wounded party. You probably will have an emotional meltdown when its all over but ultimately, you'll be happier.

Does anyone else have snow on the ground?

Birdie85

Not much snow on the ground Code, but lots of slushy stuff falling down in fits and starts. I'm confused, not a flake of snow in my area all winter and now that spring's on the way it's decided to make an appearance!

Tea, maybe you could buy him a tent and a camping stove as a leaving present/massive hint?!

tea_lover

codemonkey wrote: »

Just seen your post tea. Just remember, he started all this, so can't play the wounded party. You probably will have an emotional meltdown when its all over but ultimately, you'll be happier.

Does anyone else have snow on the ground?

Exactly. He has spent the last two years (at least) making it very, very clear that I don't even figure on his priority list, let alone near the top of it. Everytime I wanted to do anything - from a holiday to a quick walk around the block - he was too busy. Whenever he wanted to play football, watch football, buy trainers or go mountain biking he had plenty of time. He's offered no support at all through some tricky work/family stuff. He couldn't even be bothered to look up from his ipad and reply to me whenever I tried to speak to him.

I told him I wouldn't stand it for it forever. Not my fault that he chose not to believe me.

ETA: ooh good plan, I think there's a old mouse-eaten tent in the attic, might dig it out lol.

codemonkey

Or start leaving the property listings lying around the house.

Pyxis

tea_lover wrote: »

Still no progress on him finding somewhere else to go - not sure what I can do to get his ar.se in gear.

As Birdie said, could you perhaps find him some flats to let online? Assuming he wants to rent, of course.
Or start (or bring it up again if already decided) discussing the division of things, and get that written down, so that there's no last minute wrangling over what's his and what's yours?
That will keep reminding him that the situation is a real one, that it is actually happening, and that you mean business.

tealover wrote: »

Sorting the practical things gives me something to focus on. No doubt once he has finally gone and the legal things are finished I'll be a snivelling wreck for a few months.

Well yes, you will, Tea, but being prepared for it will help. You'll be grieving, for the good times you once had and for the what-might-have-been. Getting everything settled will really help, though, maybe even starting a new activity now, so that you'll have a new focus once you're on your own.

It might also help to write an account now, of what you've been feeling these last months, so that maudlin sentimentality doesn't overwhelm you in the future, and to remind you that you haven't made a mistake,
That might help you shrug off any maudlin sentiment that might arise, and make you strong again.
Just a thought, anyway. :A

jobbingmusician

Pyxis wrote: »

Edit. It's here......but warning..:D..don't listen to it if you've a sensitive nature about bodily functions!

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=TXGNuJ6wIes

Love it! (Sorry for late reply but listening to it any earlier would have disturbed Mr JM )

Well done tea! Yes, no doubt there will be an emotional meltdown later, but you are going into a really exciting period. Househunting! (you haven't found one yet, have you?) Buying a property! By yourself! Furnishing it to YOUR taste! (I am sooo lucky that we agree about taste in this household.) And living by yourself, without someone being horrid to you!

How is everyone today? Are you any better, WaS? xxx Hugs to all.

tea_lover

Pyxis - very good idea. I'm sure once the everyday annoyances of the state of the kitchen/bathroom are gone, I'll start remembering things through rose-tinted glasses... as we all do.

JM - I'm staying in the current house. Mortgage is being transferred to sole name, and I'm buying him out. Exciting times! I keep wandering around the house thinking about how much more space I'll have, and how tidy it will be!

WaS - hope you had a lovely big sleep and the windows finally get sorted today!