Hiding habits from your partner.

paye

This got me thinking on a different post I was Typing.

I've been with my partner for the past 7 years, she knows everything about me or so she think she does. However one thing that she dosen't know about me is that I got a habbit or i'm addicted to smoking weed. I've been smoking this since the age I was 18 and still do it up until today.

I would say there was a point in my life that I was smoking this constantly and when I say constant, I mean everyday on average I use to smoke about 6-7 spliffs a day. As i've got older (33 now) the habibit has started to where off a little. During the week when I have work I don't smoke. But I only have the urge to smoke it over the weekend. I would love to stop but find it really difficult to do so and at the same time, I feel so guilty about my wife not knowing about my habit.

fairy_lights

Are you sure she doesn't know? Surely you spend your weekends together and she would notice what you're doing. Doesn't she have a sense of smell?

paye

nope she doesn't know , I smoke a joint when the kids and wife have gone to bed. I don't even know if she knows what it smells like.partly the reason why I want to stop is because of my kids.

Hedgehog99

If I was your wife and I found out, I'd be livid.

Ames

So, you're smoking it in the home and think she can't smell it in the place or on you?

I stayed in a hostel in December and one of the guys in my dorm was smoking it outside, even so the room stank so much that I was catching whiffs of it in my clothes days after I'd left.

McKneff

Resist the urge, do something else instead.


Thy say that Nicotine is harder to get off than Heroin.


I haven't had a cigarette for nearly 10 months, I smoked for over 50 years, I get a habit 'urge' at least 10 times a day, if I can resist these urges, you can too.


So what is the difference between weekdays and weekends, work on that and you will find it easier.

McKneff

Are you smoking inside or outside.............




If you are smoking outside, at least 20ft from a door or window, you will be home free.


Any closer and your wife, and your kids will already know,..... smokers of anything are ALWAYS in denial, they have no idea of the stink they create.

marisco_2

Why did you take the decision to keep a part of who you are from the person who is supposed to be your life partner? You fail to have a proper relationship with someone, when you cant be totally open and honest with them and risk damaging the trust that they have placed in you. Differences are there to be discussed and accepted not hidden.

paye

McKneff wrote: »

Resist the urge, do something else instead.


Thy say that Nicotine is harder to get off than Heroin.


I haven't had a cigarette for nearly 10 months, I smoked for over 50 years, I get a habit 'urge' at least 10 times a day, if I can resist these urges, you can too.


So what is the difference between weekdays and weekends, work on that and you will find it easier.

weekdays i'm constantly busy at work and when i come home, i just want to eat, spend some time with the kids a go bed. weekend slightly different lots of free time. I have a workshop at the bottom of my garden which the wife hardly goes into. I will never smoke it inside the house. Your right i need to try and resit the urges and first thing I need to do is quit smoking cigarettes as they don't help.

balletshoes

paye wrote: »

nope she doesn't know , I smoke a joint when the kids and wife have gone to bed. I don't even know if she knows what it smells like.partly the reason why I want to stop is because of my kids.

its a very distinctive smell though - if you are smoking in or near the house it will be noticeable, unless she has no sense of smell whatsoever? It would also be on your clothes if you're smoking in an enclosed space?

paye

marisco wrote: »

Why did you take the decision to keep a part of who you are from the person who is supposed to be your life partner? You fail to have a proper relationship with someone, when you cant be totally open and honest with them and risk damaging the trust that they have placed in you. Differences are there to be discussed and accepted not hidden.

I honestly don't know the answer as to why I have never told her about it, probably because I thought I could pack it in. She would be upset if she found out I've hidden this from her. I always have this thought at the back of my mind, if something was to happen to me and the wife found out from the doctors that I was a user of cannabis that would break her. Also my life insurance could probably be invalid. I seriously need to think about the consequences and do something about it.

[QUOTE\]she has no sense of smell whatsoever? It would also be on your clothes if you're smoking in an enclosed space?[/QUOTE]

i also smoke cigarettes, she probably think it's that.