Taking Children out of School in Term Time

Baby_Angel

pollyanna24 wrote: »

Even if you live with said brother?

Especially then, wouldn't he know better? He should understand the school attendance issues you are having.

TBagpuss

I think the first thing you need to decide is whether you want to go (ie whether the costs (assuming no fine) and DD missing the start of school are too much for you.
Be clear in your own mind what, if anythign, would change your mind - for instance, if your brother offered to pay towards the flights or other costs.

If your feeling is that no, it's not going to work, sit down with your brother sooner rather than later, explain that you are very sorry but unfortunately it is not going to work out, that this is not a case of not wanting to support him and his fiancee but simply that it does not work.

if your feeling is that ou want to go, then at that point I would say make the application to the school, tell your brother and SIL-to-be that you are doing so, but also be very clear about the outcome - e.g. if you cannot afford the fine, be clear that if the school refuses permission you will not be able to come.

Person_one

pollyanna24 wrote: »

No, she's not Greek, they (well she) just decided to get married over there as her parents have bought a holiday villa over there.

But...they're not getting married over there!

They're basically asking you to come on the honeymoon with them, not to the wedding.

duchy

Where in Greece is the wedding?

Often there's little difference between scheduled and charter flights.... Try putting the flight into skyscanner with more limited dates eg long weekend rather than the whole week and see if it comes up with a connection changing at probably Athens. Even if it's a little more than the charter the saving on things like the dog sitter might make the numbers better and help you decide if you can go to your brother with a compromise ?

(Why are you paying for your parent's flights ? Surely that's your brother's job)

notanewuser

pollyanna24 wrote: »

Hassle
6.50am flight (which means getting my kids up at about 2am).
Four hour flight (enough said)
No toys for a week (although there is a pool).
No kids channels on demand.
possibly no wifi

Not specifically for this trip but do your kids know what drawing is? It's really not hard to stash a few books, paper and crayons in your case? Have you a tablet? If the kids must have telly while they're away you can download stuff to that and take it with you. Stash a couple of cheap games or play sets in the case. Or even better give each a backpack and let them put whatever toys they want to take themselves.

People have managed this situation for decades before wifi!

supersaver2

Person_one wrote: »

But...they're not getting married over there!

They're basically making you to come on the honeymoon with them, not to the wedding.

Well not quite 'making' them, I'm sure the OP does have a choice. Never understand all this fuss, if it's to much hassle, just don't go and give your perfectly valid reasons. Problem solved!

Jagraf

pollyanna24 wrote: »

Even if you live with said brother?

Hmm, I am thinking of this now though. My parents will still go. My mum minds my girls, so I could just book days off work and enjoy the peace!

We agreed to go when it seemed all we had to do was pay for flights.

But now I've thought:-
Cost
Dog sitter - £240 (£30 a night for 8 nights)
Possible fine - £360
Food while in the apartment - £....
Hire car - £200 (we were just going to rely on my brother's fiancee and her parents to ferry us about, but sure they'll have other things on their mind).

Hassle
6.50am flight (which means getting my kids up at about 2am).
Four hour flight (enough said)
No toys for a week (although there is a pool).
No kids channels on demand.
possibly no wifi

Who are you living with after the wedding? Are they both coming to live with you? Can you clarify your living arrangements a bit

Loz01

OP it seems like you mean well by wanting to go to your brothers wedding (of course) but don't be afraid to say no and put your own feelings and kids first. It is inconvenient to hold a wedding abroad, especially when you have school age children and have to pay a fine. If theyre getting married in the UK, really they are asking a lot by asking people to travel to Greece just for a reception!! My friend got married abroad and I couldn't afford to go but they held the party back home as they knew most people wouldn't want to go abroad/couldn't afford it. Like you say its not just a flight and hotel, its dog sitters and all these extra expenses you find being heaped upon yourself.

Person_one

supersaver2 wrote: »

Well not quite 'making' them, I'm sure the OP does have a choice. Never understand all this fuss, if it's to much hassle, just don't go and give your perfectly valid reasons. Problem solved!

Should have said 'asking', hence the 'to', must have been an autocorrect!

pollyanna24

TBagpuss wrote: »

I think the first thing you need to decide is whether you want to go (ie whether the costs (assuming no fine) and DD missing the start of school are too much for you.
Be clear in your own mind what, if anythign, would change your mind - for instance, if your brother offered to pay towards the flights or other costs.

If your feeling is that no, it's not going to work, sit down with your brother sooner rather than later, explain that you are very sorry but unfortunately it is not going to work out, that this is not a case of not wanting to support him and his fiancee but simply that it does not work.

if your feeling is that ou want to go, then at that point I would say make the application to the school, tell your brother and SIL-to-be that you are doing so, but also be very clear about the outcome - e.g. if you cannot afford the fine, be clear that if the school refuses permission you will not be able to come.

Thank you. This is a very helpful post and certainly something to think about.