Taking Children out of School in Term Time

Person_one

pollyanna24 wrote: »

They don't have kids I guess and don't realise how much hassle that causes

I don't have kids either, it takes about 5 seconds of thought whether you have them or not to realise that September is not a good time for a 4 year old to go on holiday!

onlyroz

Firstly, if your youngest is not statutory school age then they will be allowed to go - I took my son out for the week after October half-term when he was in reception and there were no problems. However, if you're talking about a week in September then this really is very early in the school year, and might impact on them forming friendship groups etc.

You *might* get permission for your oldest child - I'm not sure if weddings count as "exceptional circumstances" - however they might be dubious about why you need to take a whole week off. Could you just go for a few days instead? Or would it be a possibility for the children to stay with another friend or relative, and for you to go without them?

Baby_Angel

We had the same dilemma last year. My brother's wedding was on Aug 31st in a remote town in India, where the airport was about 8 hours away!!! The school was to start on the 1st of Sep. We clearly told them to think of all the school children who they expect to come to the wedding, when deciding on the date. That was the best they could do. I actually showed all proof of wedding to the Headteacher, who is usually a very nice lady. However she refused. We were set to miss atleast 2 days of school. My DD was looking forward to the wedding, because she was going to meet all her 15 cousins from both sides. It later turned out that the school had 2 staff training days in the beginning of the year and we manage to commute back on those days and didn't miss the school start. We usually never take her out of school, term time, no matter how important the occasion is. We would have not definitely lied or faked illness. I believe you should do what you think is right. After all you are going to live with any consequences.

Jagraf

I wouldn't take them out of school. I would speak to my brother and tell him why. I would however think about going myself if you could find someone to look after the kids.

I'm very close to my bro. There have been numerous things I have not attended, and also things he has swapped to fit in with school etc. as someone else suggested, even of you don't have kids you can work out the hassles :cool:

I turned down a wedding in Spain last year because some friends of ours were getting married over there for no other reason than it was 'different'.

Jagraf

Baby_Angel wrote: »

We had the same dilemma last year. My brother's wedding was on Aug 31st in a remote town in India, where the airport was about 8 hours away!!! The school was to start on the 1st of Sep. We clearly told them to think of all the school children who they expect to come to the wedding, when deciding on the date. That was the best they could do. I actually showed all proof of wedding to the Headteacher, who is usually a very nice lady. However she refused. We were set to miss atleast 2 days of school. My DD was looking forward to the wedding, because she was going to meet all her 15 cousins from both sides. It later turned out that the school had 2 staff training days in the beginning of the year and we manage to commute back on those days and didn't miss the school start. We usually never take her out of school, term time, no matter how important the occasion is. We would have not definitely lied or faked illness. I believe you should do what you think is right. After all you are going to live with any consequences.

Excellent post.

pollypenny

Oh, weddings cause more problems than anything!

They will already be married by the time they get to Greece. Why not a big party here? Is the fianc!e Greek?

I think a little chat with brother would be the best at this stage. It's a difficult decision for you, OP.

Jagraf

pollyanna24 wrote: »

Again, this is true. And I think I am being a witness to this bit. And her brother the other witness. And they have parents, and my kids and that's it.

As much as I'd like a holiday, I am thinking that I'd rather take them (at 6 and 4) to Butlins for less money and hassle, but as I live with my brother at the moment, not sure I could take the fallout if I don't actually attend this big do in Greece.

I would risk the fallout. He would be being silly and selfish. It would be the most expensive party invite ever!!! Five flights plus hassle from the school. I would prefer a bit of hassle from my brother!

pollyanna24

pollypenny wrote: »

Oh, weddings cause more problems than anything!

They will already be married by the time they get to Greece. Why not a big party here? Is the fianc!e Greek?

I think a little chat with brother would be the best at this stage. It's a difficult decision for you, OP.

No, she's not Greek, they (well she) just decided to get married over there as her parents have bought a holiday villa over there.

I think I will sit down with them and see what they say. They know I have reservations about going, but everyone's opinions on taking them out of school has made it worse for me. I didn't think it would be that bad to take them out of school, they have good attendance at all other times, but thinking about it, it is really.

They are already annoyed at so many of the family not going out there, but I think they have to accept that. I honestly think it is going to be just the parents going at this rate! Think they rushed into booking a wedding over there and regret it now. The other day I suggested "cutting their losses" and just organise something over here, but that didn't go down too well.

pollyanna24

Jagraf wrote: »

I would risk the fallout. He would be being silly and selfish. It would be the most expensive party invite ever!!! Five flights plus hassle from the school. I would prefer a bit of hassle from my brother!

Even if you live with said brother?

Hmm, I am thinking of this now though. My parents will still go. My mum minds my girls, so I could just book days off work and enjoy the peace!

We agreed to go when it seemed all we had to do was pay for flights.

But now I've thought:-
Cost
Dog sitter - £240 (£30 a night for 8 nights)
Possible fine - £360
Food while in the apartment - £....
Hire car - £200 (we were just going to rely on my brother's fiancee and her parents to ferry us about, but sure they'll have other things on their mind).

Hassle
6.50am flight (which means getting my kids up at about 2am).
Four hour flight (enough said)
No toys for a week (although there is a pool).
No kids channels on demand.
possibly no wifi

Mojisola

pollyanna24 wrote: »

They are already annoyed at so many of the family not going out there, but I think they have to accept that.

People can chose to have their wedding celebration where they want but they shouldn't be pressurising people to pay out to join them or get annoyed if people decide not to go.:(